Memories
by LoremIpsum
Summary: Riley deals with a trauma from his past with the help of his friends.
1. The Party

A/N: Everyone else has been writing their own Riley angst stories so I thought why not add my own to the hoard. This one is a hats off to savechangestonormal

This dinner would be the death of him, Riley was positive of that. Ever since the discovery of the Templar treasure, he felt like his world did a 180. Whether this was a good or bad thing, Riley couldn't say for sure. Sometimes he missed the days when he could walk down the street without someone saying, "Hey, it's that guy who helped find the treasure!" So what, he _just happens_ to help find a treasure worth billions that was hidden for centuries under a church. Did that mean he had to suffer through endless stiff parties? He was getting tired of them, and he was sure this one would be the same as the others. Even though he had to go, it didn't mean he couldn't whine about it.

On the way to the party Riley sat in a limo with Ben and Abigail. He occupied most of the ride by complaining, much to the agony of his friends. Even the driver seemed to be getting irritated. Finally Abigail threatened to scratch Riley's Ferrari with her keys. "I'll do it, if you don't shut it," she warned threateningly, brandishing her keys in Riley's face. The young man slumped down in his seat and pouted but stopped whining. Ben caught Abigail's eye and his lips quirked into a smile. The rest of the trip was relatively peaceful, if it wasn't for the fact that Riley began clicking the cup holders in and out.

When they arrived at the hall, reporters and photographers waited outside the limo. Riley groaned. "Come on, can't a guy just be relatively famous in privacy?" he quipped as he unfastened his seatbelt. Ben grinned as they waited for the driver to open the door.

"There's always a price to fame, huh? You'd think if you were famous people would just treat you like you weren't."

"I know right? Wait…" said Riley, trying to process Ben's statement. Getting out was like stepping into a spotlight. About twenty flashes from cameras went off simultaneously. Blinking, he tried to clear away the green splotches left over. Ben helped Abigail out of the limo. "After you, madam" he said gallantly.

"Why, thank you good Sir," Abigail answered in amusement. Watching this exchange take place, Riley couldn't help but roll his eyes. Ben had always been the gallant type.  
"What?" Ben asked, putting an arm around his wife. "I'm just bringing back chivalry. You know, knights and ladies."

"Ben, Abigail isn't a lady." Riley said pointedly. Abigail stuck out her tongue at him. "At least I'm not the joker." Riley was about to spew something back when Ben held out his hand. "Okay you two. Save your witty retorts for after the party. Let's just enjoy ourselves, alright?" Riley groaned and followed them into the hall.

The room they entered was big enough, managing to fit a couple hundred people comfortably. Riley broke away from his friends and made a beeline for the buffet table. Looking over the food, he decided to sample some of the chicken and salad. Not too shabby. He glanced over at Ben and Abigail. They were milling around with the other party members talking and laughing easily. Riley sighed, wishing sometimes that he had that kind of charismatic personality. Oh well. He took a shrimp off a tray of a passing server. Ben walked over to his friend. "Enjoying yourself?" He had so speak loudly over the music and general banter from the crowd. Riley swallowed the shrimp and shrugged. "The food's not bad." Ben smirked at the comment. "That's probably the only thing that keeps you coming to these things," he said, reaching to take a chicken off a Riley's plate. "Hey, get your own," Said Riley sheltering the overflowing plate of food protectively. "Riley, you have about eight chicken legs on there."

"Doesn't mean I won't eat them all."

"You have a monster stomach. I don't get how you're still scrawny with everything you eat."

"Monster metabolism," Riley offered, chomping on his chicken. Ben snorted and headed over to the buffet table.

Riley watched him go contemplatively and resumed eating his dinner. He finished rather quickly and almost instantly a passing server took the plate from him. Riley had to hand it to them; they did their jobs well. He then looked around wondering what to do with the rest of his time.

Suddenly he felt a hand grasp his shoulder. He turned around and froze. "Hello Riley." The man in front of him was tall with graying hair. He looked about in his sixties and was clutching a hat to his chest. The clothes he was wearing made him stick out in the crowd like a sore thumb. They were dirty and old, like he was living on the street. But it was his eyes that made Riley's insides go cold. They were Riley's eyes. Only they were older and wearier. The man pressed his thin lips together. "It's been a long time. I've been looking for you." Riley stepped back.

"D-dad?" It couldn't be. It was impossible. His dad reached out and grabbed him by the front of the shoulders. People around them began to stare. "I need to talk to you…about what happened." Riley shook his head numbly.

"Let me go." The man tightened his grip. Riley attempted to tear himself away but his father held fast. The crowd watching them began to mutter amongst themselves in confusion. "Listen to me, son!" The word _son _seemed to trigger something inside of Riley. "Let me go!" he shouted now desperately trying to free himself. People moved out of the way as the two men began to struggle violently with each other. Riley attempted to pull himself away and collided with a table, sending it to crashing to the ground. The noise drew the attention of the entire hall. "I came all this way-," the man said in desperation, "To talk with you!" Riley made a ditch attempt to jerk his body away but old man's grip was like steel. "Riley-"

"There he is!" Suddenly three security guards tore his father off of him.

"How they hell did he get in here?"  
"Beats me. He's probably just some crazy bum from the street."

"Had to much to drink maybe. Throw him out of the building."

One of the security guards walked over to him. "You're not hurt, Mr. Poole?" The younger man shook his head. "Okay, good. He was just being unruly I suppose."

Riley stood numbly as they began to drag his father away.

"I need to talk to my son!" he said to them frantically. The guards laughed at that one.

"Oh really? So what's the story? You discovered Mr. Poole was your long lost son when you found out he was rich? Please, we've heard it all."

As they moved toward the front exit, the crowd parted as they past. Looking over his shoulder his father shouted, "Things are different now, Riley!"

Riley was only dimly aware of the stares and people around him asking him if he was all right. Suddenly it felt like the air was too thin and he began to panic. Riley bolted, pushing his way through the crowd. He didn't know where he was going, he only knew he needed to get away.


	2. The Concern of Friends

A/N: This chapter turned out longer then I expected…angst alert.

Ben pushed his way though the crowd, trying to see what the source of the commotion was. He heard shouting and saw the security guards dragging a man in ragged clothes away. _What in the world is going on? _Ben thought in confusion. He squeezed closer to the front of the crowd. Many of the people around him were talking excitedly amongst themselves.

"Can you tell me what happened here?" he asked a lady who was standing next to him. The woman who had been talking with her friends looked over at him and seemed to do a double take. "You're Benjamin Gates, aren't you?" she asked breathlessly. Ben groaned inwardly. Out loud he said "Yes, that's me."

She and her friends giggled and flocked around him. "See Mabel? I told you he was even more handsome close up."

"We're big fans Mr. Gates," another gushed. Ben gave a forced smile. _What do you know, my very own groupies, Abigail won't be too happy about this._

"Um, thank you ladies. But can you answer my question?"

The women shared knowing glances with each other. The lady named Mabel beckoned him closer to listen. "You should be interested in this, Mr. Gates. Your friend Riley Poole was involved." Ben looked at her sharply. _Riley? _

"Did you see anything?" he asked tensely. Mabel seemed more then happy to answer his question. Her friends leaned in to listen excitedly.

"I didn't see all of it but from what I hear, that bum who was just dragged away somehow got past security in the front. Then he came in here and started talking to your friend."

Another lady broke in to continue the story.

"It was very strange, you know? He grabbed him by the shoulders…and well, Mr. Poole just freaked out. He tried to throw the man off himself. I saw them scuffling over there," she indicated with a gloved hand. "They knocked over a table. The security guards came and put an end to it though." She sounded disappointed.

Ben was confused as ever. What was going on? Suddenly his insides clenched. Did that man do something to Riley? "Did you see where he went?" Ben asked apprehensively. The woman nodded and pointed toward the exit sign at the back of the room. "He seemed to be in a hurry to go somewhere. But Mr. Gates, can't you stay and talk with us for a while?"

"I'm sorry but I need to check on my friend," he said irritably.

"But we've been wanting to talk with you all evening!"

"Ben?"

Aha! Yes, the Calvary has arrived. He could have kissed Abigail right then. She walked up to him. "Did you see what happened? I'm worried about Riley."

Ben muttered to her quickly, "I know, I'm trying to go find him but I can't get these ladies off my back. Can you talk to them to keep them occupied?"  
Abigail smiled a little evilly. "I'll see what I can do." She turned to Mabel and her friends to begin a conversation. "So are you fans of Mr. Gates?" Abigail asked casually. The other ladies giggled. "We were just talking about how handsome and rugged he is. Who wouldn't like a treasure-hunter I mean, it's like having your own Indiana Jones," one said dreamily. Then she looked around in confusion. "Hey, where'd he go?" she whined. Unnoticed by his fans, Ben had slipped away into the crowd. Abigail shrugged, "He probably has something more important to attend to," she said lightly. _Are these ladies serious? This is absolutely ridiculous! _

"Oh my goodness, I _know. _He must meet so many famous people," said Mabel totally ignorant of Abigail's insult. "He is totally my future husband. I'm Mabel by the way, are you one of his fans?"

"Oh? It's a pleasure. I'm Abigail Gates. His _wife_." Abigail said brightly. The other women looked momentarily mortified. Abigail smiled at them and walked in with an air of satisfaction.

Meanwhile, Ben was heading in the direction pointed out to him. _Oh Riley, what happened back there? _he thought anxiously. He opened the door in the furthest corner of the room with a neon orange exit sign over it. It lead to the back parking lot of the building. He shut the door behind him and the noise of the party was muffled. The summer night was quiet, broken by the sound of nearby traffic and the underlying song of crickets.

Glancing around, he breathed a sigh of relief when he saw his friend. Riley was leaning against the building staring into the night, seemingly unaware of Ben's presence. As Ben approached he became worried when he saw that Riley was shaking. It was a warm summer's night, so it couldn't be from the cold. Ben was standing almost next to him now, but Riley didn't seem to notice.

Ben placed his hand on Riley's shoulder. His friend whipped around stared at him with a frightened expression. Then he seemed to visibly relax when he saw who it was. "Ben…" he said with a slight tremor in his voice. He was breathing heavily and clutching the wall with one hand. Ben was momentarily startled by his friend's reaction.

"Riley, are you okay?" Ben asked, the worry in his chest growing.

"Yeah, Ben. I'm…fine," Riley said shakily.

"I don't think you are. Can you tell me what happened?" Ben pressed gently. His friend remained silent, staring blankly at him. He placed his hand on Riley's shoulder again, almost cautiously.

"Riley, come on. Tell me. I need to hear what happened from you, I only have information second hand."

"Ben, it's okay. I'm…I'm…" Riley trailed off, putting a hand over his face.

"Riley?" Ben asked in concern. His friend's breaths were becoming closer to sobs. "I'm…not… fine," he choked out. He turned his face to the wall, still covering it with a trembling hand. Ben immediately put his arm around Riley's back. He felt the kid shuddering, trying desperately to control his emotions. The anxiousness Ben had been feeling plummeted into downright fear. A surge of anger accompanied it. Whoever that man was, he scared his friend. Badly. _Oh God, please don't let it be anything terrible. Please._

"Riley..." Ben had to work at keeping his own voice level. He rubbed Riley's back, trying to comfort him. "Shh, it's okay. Calm down, it's okay." Riley fought to regain his composure, concentrating on Ben's voice. Finally his panic subsided a few notches. For a moment he kept his head bowed. Then he straightened up, drawing on all his self-control to not loose it entirely in front of Ben. "Okay," he said quietly. "Sorry about that."

Ben squeezed his friend's shoulders and looked into his face carefully. "Can you tell me what happened back there?" He made his voice as gentle as he could. Riley was already so distraught. He looked like some kind of cornered animal. Ben had no idea what was wrong and it made his stomach twist.

Riley swallowed and bit his lip. "Nothing I particularly want to talk about at the moment."

"Riley, something about that guy really upset you." Riley lowered his eyes, unable to make eye contact with his friend.

"Hey," Ben said softly. "Kid, look at me." Reluctantly, Riley raised his eyes to look into Ben's face again. His expression was laced with concern, which is what Riley expected. But beneath that he was shocked to see two other emotions he wasn't expecting. Anger and fear shown in his eyes. With a sinking feeling of guilt he began to realize how anxious Ben must be. After all, if they reversed positions Riley would be worried sick for his friend.

"Riley…did he hurt you? Did he threaten you?" Ben's voice began to hold an edge panic. It seemed snap Riley out of some sort of trance. He looked into Ben's deep brown eyes and came to a resolution to tell him the truth.

"No, Ben, nothing really like that." Riley said. Something that felt like relief came over Ben. He really thought that creep did something to Riley, but he was thankfully wrong. But then what was going on?

"There's uh, something I should tell you," Riley continued. His next sentence came out with difficulty. "That man was my father," Ben jerked back in surprise, not expecting that answer. How in the world did his father end up at an exclusive party? Unless…he knew Riley would be there. But why did Riley's father want to see him?

"Your father?" Riley had never spoken about his family and Ben had never made it a point to ask. "Riley, what-"

Riley cut him off with a stained voice. "I don't know Ben. I don't know why my father was at the party tonight."

"Then what's going on Riley? This isn't…you! There's something you're not telling me!" Ben said, his voice rising. He wasn't angry with Riley; on the contrary he was worried sick. There was something about worrying for his friend that made him want to get to the bottom of the problem. He wanted to fix it.

Riley flinched at Ben's tone. The man rarely snapped at him. The last time he could remember that happening was in the tunnels under Trinity Church. Ben closed his eyes for a brief moment. When he spoke again his voice was low. "I'm sorry, I didn't want to raise my voice at you. I-if you're not ready to tell me, it's okay."

Riley looked at him. His face was so helpless and apologetic. If anyone deserved to know it was Ben.

"No, it's okay Ben. You're right. I'll tell you… I'll tell you everything. But right now...I really don't want to be here…" It was true. Riley didn't know what he was going to do if he had to weather out the rest of the party. Ben pressed his lips together and nodded. His friend looked so freaked out. And the way he reacted… It scared Ben half to death. He offered what he hoped was an encouraging smile. "Okay. Let's call it a night, huh?"

They both made their way back to the exit door. "You ready?" Ben asked looking over at his friend. Riley took a steadying breath and his expression was once again composed. "Yeah, let's go in."

As soon as they entered nearly the entire hall looked in their direction. Riley faltered, seeing the stares of so many people directed at him. Ben placed his hand on Riley's back and guided him through the crowd. People glanced at Riley and muttered to each other, but otherwise kept their distance mostly because of the glares Ben kept shooting at them.

Ben spotted Abigail hurrying toward them. Her expression held concern as she walked up to them. "Are you okay sweetie?" she asked Riley.  
He almost laughed. "Sweetie? You never call me sweetie."  
Ben sighed. "She's worried about you Riley. We both are." Riley bit his lip and looked at the floor. "Oh." Guilt began to settle acutely in his stomach.

Abigail looked sharply between them. Her husband had on a resolute grim expression. He looked more like a bodyguard at the moment then anything else. It was probably why people were keeping their distance. Something must have happened with Riley to make him this uptight. She looked over Riley carefully. He looked almost feverish. "What happened?" she asked tensely.

"We'll talk about it later, but not here. I'm taking Riley back." Ben said in a low voice, aware of the stares of the people around them. Riley gave him a quick but grateful smile. "Thanks Ben," he said softly. Ben patted his arm and took out his cell phone to call the limo driver. Abigail steered him away from the oppressive crowd.

"We'll prepare a guest room for you tonight. It would take a while for you to get home anyway. You might as well stay at our place for the night." Riley glanced at her, feeling embarrassed. "Thanks for the offer Abi but…"  
"It wasn't an offer."

"Um, okay then." The guilt he had been feeling intensified. His friends were making such a fuss over him. He should be dealing with this issue himself. It was his problem.

"Look, Abi? I really don't want to be a burden or anything. I don't want to ruin your evening."

Abigail snorted. "I usually don't like agreeing with you Riley, but most of these parties are the same exact thing every time. I'm not missing anything." Riley still felt intensely embarrassed and wrapped his arms around himself staring into space. Abigail touched his shoulder. He looked at her.

"Hey. You're not ruining anything. Me and Ben want to help you with whatever it is."

Riley's mouth twitched into a smile. He was grateful beyond words for their concern but he doubted anyone could help him.

The ride back was awkwardly quiet. Riley had withdrawn into himself and was staring out the window. Ben and Abigail kept glancing at him and exchanging looks with each other. He sighed and rubbed his face with his hands. He just needed to go to bed. He didn't want to think about this anymore.  
After about an hour they finally reached the Gates' household. Abigail showed Riley to the guestroom and asked him he needed anything. _What am I, five years old? _But he that's what he felt like. It felt like he was a child all over again. He said no and thanked her before closing the door.

Abigail went back to her own bedroom and found Ben sitting on the edge of the bed looking troubled. She sat next to him and linked her arm into his. "Are you going to tell me what happened when you talked to him?" she asked. Ben sighed before filling her in with the little information he gathered from Riley. "He said that man was his father."

"His father?" asked Abigail, feeling a little perturbed. "Why was his father at that party of all places?"

"I don't know, Abi. You should have seen the kid. He was a complete mess. There's a huge chunk of the story he's not telling us, I'm sure of it."

Abigail was silent for a moment. "He'll tell us when he's ready."

"That's what I'm hoping. He can't deal with it on his own…whatever 'it' is." Ben sighed and gazed blankly at the wall. "I've never seen Riley like this. Ever. He was fine a few hours ago."

Abigail squeezed her husband tighter.

"It scares you," she said quietly.

"Yeah."

"Me too."

A/N: In this chapter I wanted to show the anxiousness a person feels when someone close to them is going through an ordeal. It's the worse for the actual person obviously, but their friends and family sort of suffer whatever it is with them. On a lighter note…wait…just kidding, no lighter note. The next chapter will also be quite angst-ridden.


	3. The Nightmare

A/N: This chapter is probably the most angst-ridden thing I've written. I apologize in advance for the overall gloom and doom.

_He wasn't really sure where he was. Everything around him was dark. Whenever he tried to move blinding pain would shoot through his whole body. Unadulterated terror gripped his being. Was he dead? Slowly, his eyes began to adjust to his surroundings. Deep in his heart, he knew what he was about to see. _It's a nightmare; _he thought desperately, _this is a nightmare. _But he knew it was more then a bad dream. It was a memory. A memory he could never escape. Some unseen force drew his eyes. There was blood everywhere. It was all over him and everything else. And there, mutilated beyond recognition…he couldn't tear his eyes away…his chest constricted and he let out a strangled cry._

"NO!!"

Riley sat bolt upright and threw his covers off before stumbling into the bathroom. At the same moment he heard his bedroom door open. "Riley? Ben, where'd he go?"

_Oh God please, I don't want them to see me like this. _

He made it to the toilet in time before he retched. "Ugh." He wiped his mouth with his sleeve. He grimaced when he suddenly remembered Ben was lending him this pair of pajamas. "Okay then," he muttered.

He turned to see Ben and Abigail standing in the doorway, matching expressions of shock on their faces. Nobody seemed to know what to do for a moment.

"Um, can I have some water? My throat is disgusting," he said to break the intensely awkward moment. Abigail snapped out of it and nodded. "I'll be right back."

Riley sighed and slumped against the toilet bowl. He couldn't even look at his friend. Ben stood at the doorway for a few moments, before walking over to stand in front of him. To Riley's surprise, he slid down the cabinet and sat down beside him. Still not looking at Ben, Riley pulled his legs up to his chest. He wondered what Ben must have thought, just having thrown up right in front of him. Then he felt an arm across his shoulders. Riley closed his eyes for a brief moment, drawing reassurance from thee touch. Maybe Ben wasn't entirely disgusted by him after all.

"Are you sick?" Ben asked softly, although he was relatively sure of the answer. Riley shook his head. "No, I uh, had a, um…" he cleared his throat. This was so embarrassing for him. "I just had a bad dream. It's nothing to be freaked out about."

"Can you tell me what it's about?"  
Riley winced. The question was simple enough but it made him feel nauseous again.

"I-it's something that happened a long time ago. I have it a lot actually, so this isn't the first time I dreamed it." _I had it ever since I was ten. _

Ben looked at Riley with a quiet concern in his brown eyes. "Is it usually bad enough to make you throw up?" Ben had a way of getting right to the point. No beating around the bush with this guy. Riley tensed and studied the tiled floor. "No, it's not." he whispered.

Ben exhaled through his nose and leaned his head against the cabinet. There was another moment of silence.

"You scared me and Abi. We heard you shouting."

Riley looked up at him, surprised. "I was shouting?" Ben nodded, his eyes not leaving his friend. Riley suddenly looked very small. "Ben, this isn't …good."

Ben's answer was a tightened grip around his shoulders.

Abigail came bustling back in with the water. Riley took the glass gratefully. "Thanks Abi," he muttered. He washed his mouth out with the liquid before sipping it.  
"Don't mention it. Here, hold still for a minute." Riley suddenly found himself face to face with a thermometer. "Abi I'm not-" He protest was cut off when Abigail shoved the instrument into his mouth.

"Abi, it's okay. He's not sick." Ben supplied to Riley's great relief. Abigail looked startled for a moment.

"Not sick?" She leaned forward and felt his forehead. "He's warm and sweating. Take your temperature just to make sure." Riley crossed his arms and glowered at Abigail but otherwise complied. Ben's mouth twitched into a smile.

"_Under _the tongue Riley," she instructed. After a minute or so Abigail took the thermometer out and looked at it.

"See? Woman's instinct. Your temperature is a few degrees above normal." Riley and Ben looked at her with dubious expressions.

"I would recommend getting some more sleep. From the look of it you hardly got any." Abigail suggested.

"I'm not going back to sleep," Riley said in a hollow voice. The tone made his friends start. Abigail began again, a little confused. "But Riley, you have to go to sleep sometime…I have some medicine if you want," she said uncertainly. Riley shook his head.  
"I don't want to."

The terror and pain he felt in the nightmare began creeping back into him. He didn't want to experience it again. Yet he was refusing to go to sleep when Ben and Abigail didn't even need to be up with him in the first place. The obvious worry of his friends made him feel guiltier then he already was. He felt so stupid. Here he was, in his friend's bathroom having just thrown up and was refusing to go to sleep like a child. Not to mention he got some of his own vomit on his friend's pajamas. _Great way to repay them for helping, Riley. Get sick and keep them up all night. You're so pathetic, _he told himself miserably.

Riley suddenly felt more hopeless then he had in his entire life. There was no way out of this. He would be up all night with his memories. He couldn't do this. That dream would be there no matter where he went, and he knew that a night's sleep wasn't going to cure anything. The flashbacks were on the edge of his mind as he desperately tied to fight them off. Darkness seemed entrap him and he began to withdraw into himself mentally.

"Riley?" Ben's calm voice pierced through his reverie. He slowly looked at Ben, a vacant expression on his face. Something wasn't right. Ben attempted to help Riley to his feet. The kid wouldn't move. "Riley, come on, let's go back into the guest room," he said. His friend remained where he was, that eerie blank expression on his face. Ben began to get anxious again. "Abi?" His wife looked up at him with worry, hearing the quiver in his voice. "Something's wrong, he's not responding to me."

Riley had all but shut off from the world. The struggle to keep himself sane, to not loose himself to darkness blocked him off from his friends. He was only dimly aware of his friends calling his name and Ben pulling him into his chest.

"Riley, Riley, come on. Can you hear me?" Ben was fighting his fear down as he held the unresponsive young man to himself. It was terrifying to see his friend slip away like that. One moment he was there, the next…he just completely shut down like someone pulled an off switch.

"Get him onto the guest bed," Abigail said sharply, whipping out her cell phone. Ben let out an unsteady breath. "Okay Riley, here we go." With a grunt he managed to lift his friend up into his arms. He carried him across the room and laid him gently down on the bed. Abigail was following close behind dialing her cell phone. "Who are you calling?" Ben asked anxiously. "My mom. She's a psychiatrist remember?" Ben had seated himself on the bed next to Riley and had one hand on his forehead. "Do you think she can help?"

"She has a PHD, so I should hope so."  
The phone rang three times and to Abigail's great relief her mother picked up.

"Hello?" came the groggy voice.

"Mom, it's me Abi." She immediately sensed her mother sit up.

"Is everything alright?" Her mother held a more lilting German accent then herself. It especially showed up when she was stressed.

"I'm fine…it's my friend, Riley. You remember him."  
"Ah, yes. How's is the trouble maker?"

"Not well, I'm afraid."

"Why, what happened?"

"Wait, let me put you on speaker phone so Ben can hear you."  
Abigail, with some assistance from Ben, hurriedly told Mrs. Chase what has happened since the party. Her mother was quiet on the other line, listening to everything she was saying.

"Now he's not responding to anything, mom." Abigail concluded apprehensively.

"He actually fell asleep," Ben cut in. He had been watching Riley closely throughout the whole conversation. His friend's eyelids had gotten heavier until they finally closed. Ben wondered if Riley was even aware he had fallen asleep. being that he didn't want to before. Abigail glanced over and found with a certain relief that Ben was right. The exhaustion must have gotten to him. She only hoped the nightmare wouldn't find him again as well.

"Okay, he's asleep? Make sure that someone is with him in case he wakes up again. This night is rough for him. It's not healthy for people to go through this kind of thing alone." Mrs. Chase said. Ben looked unhappily at Riley, his hand still resting on his forehead. "Poor kid," he muttered.

"Okay I need to ask you a question," Mrs. Chase said. "You're saying after his father confronted him, he just became like this, out of the blue?"  
"No," Ben broke in. "He told me a few minutes ago that he would repeatedly have dreams of an event that happened to him a long time ago. But he said it wasn't normal for him to throw up."

There were a few moments of silence on the other line. Then Mrs. Chase spoke up. "It sounds like your friend is suffering from Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder."

"Really?" Ben and Abigail asked together.  
"Yes. All the symptoms are there. He's emotionally distant; he experiences repeated nightmares from a past event, he has panic and detachment. My guess is the trauma took place a while ago and he managed to repress his memories. But when he saw his father at the party, it triggered flashbacks to the trauma."

Ben and Abigail were silent for a few moments, taking this information in.

"So does that mean his dad was somehow involved with it?" Ben asked.

"Maybe, and maybe not. There can be a number of things that trigger flashbacks for people with the disorder."

"What happened to him in the bathroom? He just…wasn't there suddenly."   
"It may have been him going through emotional shock. I mean, if he suddenly has all these memories he hasn't had in years, it's bound to overwhelm him."  
"One more thing mom and I'll let you go back to sleep," said Abigail. Mrs. Chase chuckled. "Don't be silly dear. You're worried about your friend. You did the right thing calling me."  
"In that case, what can we do to help him?"  
Her mother sighed. "The disorder is a tricky thing. It can pop up at any time. I would really urge him to get professional counseling. But right now, what he needs most is for both of you to be there for him. Don't trivialize his fears."

"Thanks, mom. I appreciate your help."  
"Call me if anything comes up."   
"Love you."

"Love you too Abs."  
Abigail clicked off the phone and sat down heavily next to Ben. He took her hand and squeezed it. "Is he still sleeping?" she asked.

"Yeah, it's been an hour now." They sat in silence for a while. Abigail was beginning to nod off.

"Why don't you go back to bed, Abi. I'll sit up with him. You should get some rest." Ben suggested. Abigail hesitated for a moment then kissed him on the cheek. "Okay, but be sure to tell me if something happens."

"Of course."

Abigail looked sadly at Riley's sleeping form. She took his hand and kissed it, laid it gently back down at his side and walked quietly out of the room. Ben sat lost in his own thoughts for a while.

He remembered how grandfather had told him stories about WWII. Though Ben loved listening to them, he was always aware of the sad tone that sometimes crept into his grandfather's voice. He would talk about how many of his friends suffered from shell shock, even all these years later. Many of them had to be moved to special homes because they couldn't function in day-to-day life. Sometimes, he told Ben, he still had nightmares of being out in the battlefield.

Ben looked over at Riley. It was hard to imagine this usually vibrant and sarcastic kid going through such an ordeal. After sitting for another hour or so he began to dose off.

He awoke a little while later. Riley was stirring as well and seemed to be waking up. He opened his bright blue eyes and stared at the ceiling for a minute. Then he turned and saw Ben sitting there. "Hey, kid." Ben greeted with a smile. Riley blinked at him. "I'm sorry for getting your shirt disgusting," he said blankly. For a brief moment Ben looked like he was about to cry. Then it passed quickly. "Don't be stupid," was all he said. Riley sank back into his pillow.

"I'm so sorry, Ben," he whispered again. Ben realized he was apologizing for more the shirt. "Riley, it's not your fault." Ben said quietly. A tear traced its way down Riley's cheek.  
"I don't know what's wrong with me," he said with a vacant look in his eyes.

"Do you remember what happened?" Ben gently asked. Riley seemed to be straining his memory. "Did I pass out or something?"  
"Sort of. You just kind of blanked out for a little while. Scared the crap out of me."

"Oh." Riley looked deeply disturbed. "I mean, geez Ben. What is going on with me?" he asked brokenly.   
Ben leaned over and stroked his arm. "You're not as crazy as you might think," he told Riley. The kid suddenly had a look of faint hope on his face. "What do you mean?"

"Me and Abi talked to her mother on the phone. She's a certified psychiatrist. She believes you have Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder."   
"Really?" There was a moment's pause. 'I guess that makes sense," he muttered. There was a certain relief in his voice. "People have been cured from that, right?" he asked. Ben had a sad look in his eyes. "I don't think it ever fully goes away, Riley. People find ways to make it a livable condition."

"Well, livable is better then non-functioning" Riley said after a pause. Another silence. Ben had to work up courage to what he was about to say next. "Riley, you don't have to, but do you want to tell me what happened? Why you're having all the dreams?"  
His friend looked at him with an unreadable expression. Then finally he spoke.

"I did say that I would tell you, huh?" he muttered. Ben nodded uncertainly. Riley was silent for such a long time that Ben wondered if he had fallen back asleep. Ben jumped a little when he spoke again.

"Okay. I'll tell you and Abi. After all you've done for me you guys deserve to know."

Ben gave him a smile and squeezed his arm. More silence.

"Ben?"

"Yeah, Riley."

"I don't know if I can do it. Tell me I can."  
"I promise you Riley, you'll get through this. I'll help you."

Riley nodded reassured at his friend's encouragement. He found himself drifting into sleep. Suddenly panic seized his gut. He sat up, breathing heavily.

"Whoa, it's okay kid." Ben soothed. "What's wrong?"

"I don't think I can go to sleep."  
"You were asleep a few minutes ago."  
"Yeah, but I don't _remember _falling asleep."

Ben furrowed his brow. "Abi left the sleep medication here. It's dreamless, if that's what you're worried about."

Riley looked doubtful. "Are you sure it's dreamless?"

"That's what it says on the box."

Riley finally agreed and Ben handed him a pill with a glass of water. Riley swallowed them both. Ben continued to sit with Riley, conversing quietly with him. His friend began to talk less and less until Ben was sure he went to sleep. Then Riley spoke again.

"Ben?"  
"Right here kid."  
"If I start…I dunno…if it's obvious I'm having a nightmare, wake me up."  
There was a pause.

"Okay Riley."  
"Thanks."  
Ben watched as Riley's eyelids slowly closed and he finally went to sleep. He looked peaceful. The medicine was working. Ben stared into the darkening room and put a hand over his mouth. A single tear fell down his cheek and onto the carpet.

A/N: I actually did some research on Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder for this chapter. It's pretty interesting. Also, I don't know if there is such a medicine that makes you go into a dreamless sleep. If there is it's probably not over-the-counter anyway. Oh well!


	4. The Story

A/N: I'm sorry it took longer to get this chapter up! Here's a pre-Thanksgiving gift from me. Thanks for your reviews they are truly encouraging!

Ben stretched, trying work out a kink in his back. Glancing at the clock he saw that it was already 11:35am. Yawning, he looked around to see if Riley had woken up as well. His friend wasn't in his bed. Ben stood up feeling a little bit concerned. Then he heard the shower running and realized that Riley was in the bathroom. He sat back down again, feeling thankful his concern was a false alarm. A piece of paper on the nightstand caught his eye. He picked it up to read it, recognizing Abigail's handwriting.

_Ben-I went over to Riley's house earlier this morning and picked up a bunch of his stuff. If he asks how I got into his house tell him that I broke in through the window. I actually borrowed his keys, but don't tell him that. Didn't want to wake you-you're both so cute when you're asleep. Love you-Abi. _

Ben chuckled and put down the paper. His wife would do something like that. It wasn't a particularly short ride either; it took about an hour to get to his house. She and Riley always pretended to quarrel about things, but he knew when it came down to it they both held affection for each other.

Ben looked up as Riley walked out of the bathroom, seemingly having just taken a shower. He had on the borrowed pajama pants but not the top, for good reason. It was slung over his shoulder and it looked like he had scrubbed it until the color had faded. Riley was toweling his hair to rid it of dampness. Ben observed that he looked fatigued despite the induced sleep he was in last night.

"It takes some talent to sleep sitting up," Riley said as a greeting.

"You bet it does. I'd like to see you try it," Ben shot back. His back was feeling sore from his vigil over Riley. As far as he could tell the kid slept without any disturbances but he couldn't be sure.

"How'd you sleep?" he said, making his tone casual.

"Pretty good I think. Don't remember anything. Medicine must have worked." Riley answered. He paused and looked around.

"Um, I just thought of something. I don't have anything to change into."   
"Actually you do. Abi went and got some of your stuff."  
"What?" Riley's eyes seemed to bug out of his head. "When was this?"   
"Um, she left me a message on the nightstand. It was sometime this morning." He indicated to the corner of the room. There was a suitcase, presumably Riley's. "Enjoy."  
"Wow, Abigail's good twin must have taken over." Riley said sounding impressed. He opened the suitcase and found not only his clothes but also his laptop.

"Scratch that, it's definitely alien abduction."

Ben watched as Riley happily sorted through his clothes. The older man smiled to himself. Inwardly he thanked Abigail for bringing Riley's belongings. It seemed to cheer him up a little bit. It was what he needed after such a hellish night.

"You seem a little better this morning," Ben ventured.

"Maybe. A little. I don't know." Riley stopped going through his suitcase and sighed before turning toward Ben. "I'm scared out of my mind to tell you the truth," he admitted.   
"Why's that?"

"Because…well, because I'm going to tell you and Abi what happened to me. And…I'm just…not sure how you'll react."

"And you're scared…that we'll leave you?"  
"No! Geeze…no Ben." After how they stuck with him during roughest night he had in a long time, he wasn't expecting them to abandon him. And he couldn't even put into words how grateful he was. He wasn't used to this kind of concern from people. It was mostly because he never let anyone get close enough to him. But Ben and Abigail…they were honestly the closest friends he ever had. And they cared for him and loved him and it honestly scared him. Because if he told them…_when _he told them, he would be the most vulnerable he had ever been.

"It's not that. I trust you both." When Riley looked up, Ben could see the trust in his eyes. He wanted more then anything at that moment to just erase whatever horror happened in Riley's past. It pained him deeply to see his best friend in such a state.

"Then why?" Ben asked with genuine puzzlement.  
"I just..." Riley sighed and ran a hand through his still damp hair. "I don't want you to think of me as some kind of freak show. I know I have issues…I mean if that wasn't already obvious from last night. But I don't want to be put in some psychotic ward."

"Riley, you're always going to be the obnoxious computer geek we've always known. Nothing that happened to you is going to change that."

"Not even…" he motioned disgustedly to himself, "This? Me? I mean, I'm a freaking mess right now."  
"And you're still Riley. You're not going to transform into a different person."

"What if I am?" Riley's voice suddenly held the insecurity and fear he was feeling. "Ben, what if this thing beats me?"  
Ben stared hard at his friend, holding his gaze. "You know as well as I do that you're going to put up a hell of a fight. And when you slip up that's when I'll be there. That's when Abi will be there. We're going to support you through this until you beat it down. Don't forget that we're here for you. Get it through that thick skull of yours, Riley.

The two men held each other's gazes for another few seconds. Finally, Riley broke eye contact and shook his head.

"Wow, and people say I'm stubborn."  
"It runs in the family."

-

A few minutes later Ben left to get ready for the day himself. Riley was left alone with his thoughts. It was still terrifying. Everything felt terrifying. Not feeling like he wanted to get changed just yet, Riley wandered over to the window. He pressed his forehead against the cool glass and let his breath fog up the view to the outside.

The prospect of telling his friends still sat heavily in his stomach. He had never told anyone, his whole entire life, he kept the turmoil bottled inside. Containing it had proved difficult at first, but it became easier as time went on. The memories became grayer as the years past, only haunting him when they crept into his dreams.

He moved away from the window and sank back down on the bed.

Then last night…he saw his father. And all the memories he worked so hard at suppressing came flooding back all at once. Riley was smart enough to know he needed some kind of release. If he kept it to himself any longer he would go absolutely insane. But he was so afraid of reliving it again, especially since the story would be out in the open at last. He was surprised to feel a tear slip from his eye. It was more from being overwhelmed then anything else. He brushed it away impatiently.

Riley looked into the corner of the room where the suitcase Abigail had brought him rested. He was more then lucky to have friends like these. And he knew he could trust them. The only the problem was trusting himself to tell them.

-

It took a while for Riley to work of the resolve to finally get changed and go downstairs. He trudged down the unnecessarily long staircase that lead into the kitchen. Stopping abruptly, he leaned heavily on the railing. He heard Ben and Abigail talking in low voices to each other. The tone of their voices made it obvious the conversation was about him. Fighting off doubts that began creeping into his mind, he descended to the bottom of the stairs.

"Okay Riley," he muttered to himself. "You can do this." Finding that he just wanted to get his over with, he walked into the kitchen.

Ben and Abigail looked up as he came in. He still couldn't believe they were going through all this trouble for him.

"Your welcome." Abigail greeted pointedly.

"Good morning to you too," Riley replied without a beat.

He sank down on a chair at the kitchen table with a deep sigh and wondered what the best way to go about telling them was. It was driving him crazy. Ben and Abigail were looking at him intently. He felt their stares for a good minute before looking up.

"What?" he asked in exasperation. They not so subtly averted their eyes.

"Do you want some breakfast?" Abigail asked, changing the subject.

"Uh, no it's okay Abi…thanks." He was rather nauseous anyway. It felt like he was about to go onstage for a play. They sat in silence for another few moments before Riley banged his hands on the table, making his friends jump.

"I need to just tell you guys. I can't put if off any longer or I might change my mind!"

-

A few minutes later they were all seated on a couch in the living room. Ben and Abigail were on either side of him. He was thankful for the light streaming in through the window. It warmed him a little bit, made him think that quite possibly he could get through this. His heartbeat had elevated and he was swallowing compulsively. The distress must have shown somewhat on his face because Ben put a firm hand on his shoulder.  
"It's okay Riley, go ahead," he said encouragingly. Riley let out a breath and began, although he barely knew where to start.

"It happened when I was ten. Well, it started even before that actually. Mom and Dad were going through a divorce…It was hard on the kids, especially my younger sisters Kimberly and Miriam. They didn't really understand. My parents always had these awful fights…my dad usually came home drunk. Sometimes he would hit my mom. It was ugly stuff."  
He suddenly recalled how his sisters would come into his room seeking comfort when things were especially bad. He would do his best to distract them from the commotion downstairs, telling jokes or reading them a story. For a little while it seemed like a small oasis in Riley's room. He gulped as that memory surfaced, He hadn't thought about it in years.

"One night, dad was arrested for some reason. I can't remember now. He called the house, drunk asking my mom to bail him out. We were already tight on money so you can imagine how she reacted. It was pretty much the last straw. It was the thing that solidified the decision for her to leave. She had been threatening to do it for a long time, but Dad never really believed her. So she just grabbed us kids and got the hell out. It was that night…it turned into one of the longest of my life."

"So I guess she wasn't thinking straight or something? I don't know…She was just crying the whole time while in the car. Miriam and Kimberly didn't know what was going on. They were just crying because Mom was crying. But for whatever reason…my mom wasn't paying attention…to the road…"

At this point, Riley faltered. Maybe he couldn't do this after all.

"It's alright. Keep going." Ben's voice anchored him. He forced him himself to keep talking.

"We had an accident. They…all died. Mom, Miriam and little Kimberly. They died." It was only a small mouthful but Riley felt as though he spilt his guts all over the coffee table. He had to stop for a good minute, putting his head down and trying to control the pain threatening to burst out of his chest. Ben and Abigail patiently let Riley take all the time he needed to get his bearings. Riley didn't look at them but if he did, their expressions were horrified. After a while Riley let out a shuddering sigh and continued.

"They died instantly I was told later…I…waited for hours. I…cannot tell you…how excruciating the pain was. It was pitch black….I couldn't move because the pain was so unbearable. I honestly thought for a little while … I was in hell. The rescue workers had to take their time extracting me from the wreck..."  
"I think I passed out because the next thing I remember was being wheeled in a gurney. The noise and lights didn't make sense. But I was able to look at the car. Some EMT tried to block my view…but I saw…"  
Riley suddenly choked and bit down on his fist. Ben was gripping him so tightly that it hurt. The man had not let go once since the story began and Riley wondered briefly if his arm was sore. Abigail had reached out and taken his other hand, stroking it softly. There were a few moments of silence broken only by Riley's ragged breathing.

"I saw-my family…but they…were so mangled…I couldn't even recognize them...I could…barely…tell…"

Riley closed his eyes tightly, recollecting himself to keep talking.

"…I was in the hospital for a month. A whole month, and not once did I see my dad."

Riley gritted his teeth and glared at the carpet.

"It was because he was in jail. I guess I should have been more understanding. But…" He shook his head, not finishing the thought. There was a deep anger, a hate against his father he held for the longest time. So many things factored into it and it circulated inside like a slow moving fire. The man was dead to him as far as he was concerned, nothing could change his mind from that.

"My dad was pretty much the only family I had. I rarely had visitors. There were a few people…teachers…nuns…that sort of thing. But there was no one I knew."

Riley couldn't think too hard about that month. It still anguished him every time he thought about it, even more then a decade later.

"Middle school to the end of high school were not the best years for me. My dad still came home drunk, but in some ways it was worse. He was so unpredictable after the accident. Sometimes I would find him sitting there and crying. Other times…well, he used to slap my mom around. He started slapping me around instead."

Riley would hide his bruises under his clothes. He hated gym because he had to change. He ended up failing it most of the time for incompletes.

"Afterwards he would apologize and say how sorry he was. Whatever. I never believed him. He was so full of crap. If he were sorry he would have stopped drinking. "

"Anyway, when I turned sixteen we had this huge fight. Normally I wouldn't bother arguing with him when he was drunk. He was unreasonable. I don't even remember what it was about. "

"It ended with me being thrown down a flight of stairs. And that's when I ran away. The police found me and saw my bruises and I lived with foster parents until college. My dad wasn't allowed to see me. And I haven't seen him in years. Until last night."

Riley let out a deep breath it seemed like he was holding that whole time.

"And that's it. That's why I'm a nut job right now. That's what…" He buried his face in his hands. "…that's what happened to me," he finished brokenly.

Ben still had his hand on Riley's shoulder and Abigail had hers wrapped around his arm. He couldn't see them but they wouldn't lessen their grips, they wouldn't let go. Riley finally dared to look up at his friends. Abigail had a hand over her mouth and was blinking back tears. Ben was gazing at him with a strange mingled expression of anger and sorrow. Abigail sniffed and squeezed his arm.

"We love you very much Riley. I hope you realize that."

He looked at her in confusion. "Why?"  
"Because we're going to help you deal with this crap the best we can, whether you like it or not," Ben said.

Riley gave them both a real genuine smile. It was a tired, worn out smile but it showed the gratefulness he was feeling at that moment. Feeling overwhelmingly exhausted, he passed a hand over his eyes. Telling his story had taken everything out of him.

"I'm, uh…I'm going to…go for a walk." Riley got up in sort of daze.

"Do you need anything?" Abigail asked, her brow furrowed in worry. Riley turned slowly back around; every pore of his body seemed to be weighing him down. He looked between his two friends and shook his head. Ben ached at the grief present in Riley's blue eyes.

"No…I don't need anything…thanks Abi." With that he turned and walked through the main hall and out the front door. Ben took Abigail's hand as they watched him leave. Neither of them tried to stop him.

-

Riley walked slowly through the expanse of property belonging to the Gates. It was huge, more then five acres Ben had told him. If someone tried hard enough they could get lost. That's exactly what Riley wanted at the moment. He wanted to just wander and not think about anything at all. He wasn't really sure what he was thinking or feeling. It was this mix of so many things that they seemed to cancel each other out. All he felt was this dull pain in the center of his gut.

It mid afternoon now, the sun was at its highest point in the sky. He wasn't really sure where he was going. He just needed to be doing _something_, feel like he was going anywhere. Suddenly, he found he couldn't go on. Everything seemed to catch up to him at once. He sank down onto the grass. Then he lay flat on his back, staring straight into the sky. It was so comfortable. The chirping of insects nearby and the sun beating down on him made his eyelids grow heavy. His last drifting thought before falling asleep was that he wasn't afraid of having a nightmare.

-

Ben felt a wave of relief when he finally found Riley, only to be accompanied by panic. He hurried over to his friend, and then chuckled when he realized that Riley was sleeping. He checked his watch. It was already after six. Riley needed to come inside but he hated to wake him up when he looked so peaceful.

Ben sat down and waited for another ten minutes. Then he gently tapped Riley on the shoulder. Blue eyes fluttered open, almost reluctantly. Ben was about two feet from Riley's face with a mildly amused expression.

"Out here was probably not the best place to catch a nap. I'm surprised you didn't get sunburned."

Riley looked straight up blinking. The sun was already setting. Brilliant splashes of color filled the sky. He didn't sit up, just took the scene in. For some reason he thought of his mom and sisters. Their faces seemed to go hand in hand with the beauty of the sunset.

"She would have loved this." Riley said in an almost inaudible voice. It startled him that he spoke his own thoughts out loud. Ben followed his best friend's gaze to the sunset.  
"Who?"

Riley's expression softened, as he seemed to recall something. "Miriam. She was the outdoorsy one. She was into saving the dolphins, that sort of thing."  
Ben smiled to himself, thinking of Riley as an older brother, playing with his sisters. It was something beautiful, something that was lost in one horrific moment. Ben looked at Riley out of the corner of his eye.  
"You miss them," he said in a gentle voice. It was a statement more then a question. Riley's blue eyes misted over. No tears fell, they just shimmered on the surface.

"Yeah," he whispered thickly. Ben's expression became sorrowful as he looked at his friend.  
"Sometimes I hate them." Riley said numbly. "I hate them for leaving me. I hate them for being in my head for so many years." Riley looked at Ben, almost imploringly. "It's crazy, I know."  
Ben shook his head, feeling tears beginning to form in his own eyes. "No. It's not Riley. I promise you it's not."

"I would do anything you know." There was an emotion that Ben couldn't identify in his voice. "Anything. I would give all of the treasure in the world to have them back."

Riley's face was now hidden in the evening shadows. Sighing, Ben lay down with his hands behind his head. They both watched the sky as it grew darker and the stars began to appear. Finally Ben sat up again. The crickets had come out and the fireflies were floating around.  
"Let's go inside before the mosquitoes start biting. Plus Abigail's going to kill me for taking this long to come back. The walk back isn't far."

"Ben, I don't know if I can make it."

Ben stopped short. He knew that Riley wasn't talking about the walk.

"It just hurts. It hurts so much." Riley hadn't moved from his prostrate position since that afternoon.

Ben put out a hand to help Riley up. "I know kid. Come on. Take my hand. You'll get through this." His voice had some sort of comforting effect on Riley. He believed it when Ben said it, even though he couldn't believe it when he told himself.

Riley hesitated then reached out and grabbed Ben's hand. He was surprised at how real and warm it felt, grounding him back to reality. Ben hefted him to his feet. Riley stood there for a minute in a dream-like state and Ben rubbed his shoulder.

"Come on kid," he said quietly. They both slowly made their way through the night to the brightened house.


	5. The Decision

A/N: Word of fair warning, this chapter is looooong.

The next few days ran their dragging course and Riley zombie-walked through most of them. Motivation seemed to be sapped out of him and there wasn't a moment when he didn't feel tired. Lethargy made it difficult for him to complete any work on his laptop. He had to practically force himself to take a phone interview. Food had lost most of its appeal to him, which was something that worried Ben and Abigail to no end.

Every time they attempted to talk with him about how he was doing, Riley would suddenly retreat into himself. He would make up some excuse and hastened to another room. Ben wanted to be there for him, somewhere he could turn besides within himself. Yet he stubbornly avoided conversations with them.

Riley was more then aware that he was pushing them away. He knew he was being a jerk but he did it purposefully sometimes, not fully knowing why. At times he thought it was to test them to see if they were true to their word, that they wouldn't leave him. They never did, and it frankly annoyed him sometimes. He couldn't understand why they were still there, concerned as ever.

But mostly he was ashamed. He couldn't deal with the fact that he was in such a pathetic state and his friends had to see his misery. It was enough to make him want to go back home, to not be a burden any longer.

The fact that Riley hand suddenly went on lock down worried Ben and Abigail more then his actual depression. There was no way for them to know how deep the hurt went and how they could help him if he isolated himself. Little did Riley know that they had rearranged their schedules so that at least one of them would be at the house with him. The last thing they wanted was for him to be alone, especially since he was exhibiting obvious signs of depression.

It was four days since Riley had told them about the accident but it felt much longer. Ben had taken to observing his friend and noticed that he zoned out more and more often. The first time he noticed was when he was in the kitchen with Riley. His friend was at the sink washing his hands. Having just finished breakfast, Ben moved over to put his soiled dishes in the sink. He paused when he noticed something was amiss. Riley hand stopped scrubbing his hands; he was staring into space letting the water flow over them. Steaming water rose from the sink and Ben realized with a start that the faucet was turned all the way to hot. It was scalding. Ben pressed his lips together in worry and spoke Riley's name but the kid wouldn't look at him. It was only when he placed his hand on Riley's back did he seem to snap out of it.

These 'detachment episodes' worried Ben enough for him to peek into Riley's room at night to make sure he was all right. Most of the time he was sitting up and fiddling on his computer. Sometimes he was pacing, rubbing his hands together. One time however, he was laying on the bed, still in his clothes, even his sneakers staring blankly at the ceiling.

Small moments like those added up, even over the course of four days. It was enough for Ben to know he had to talk with Riley, at least convince him to go to a doctor. After all, none of them knew if this would pass over quickly. It could have been something that would require medication. Ben had enough sense know that Riley wouldn't want to talk with him about his disorder but it needed to be brought up. He managed to confront Riley while he was in the living room half-heartedly typing away at the laptop.

"Hey," Ben greeted.

Riley looked up with an indifferent expression.

"Hey." He answered and turned back to whatever he was working on. Ben slowly sat himself next to Riley on the couch. The computer expert pointedly ignored him, but that was okay. Ben could sit there all day if he needed to; he had the advantage being more patient. True to his prediction Riley got irritated within the course of a minute.

"Is there something you want?"  
"Yes there is actually. What's going on, Riley?" he asked.

"I dunno Ben. What do you think is going on?" It wasn't sarcasm. It seemed more of a defeated question then anything else.  
"Well, I can't know unless you tell me. You haven't really spoken to me or Abigail for the last few days."

As Ben had expected Riley suddenly withdrew from him and stood up. It was like running into a force field. "Look, I really don't want to talk about this now. I have work I need to-"

"Riley, you're hardly doing work. You're barely eating. I need to know what's going on."  
Riley slowly turned back toward him. His face was like a mask. No expression let itself through. Then he spoke slowly in a voice that Ben had ever heard from him before.  
"It's my business. It's my problem. You and Abigail have done enough for me." He snapped his laptop shut. "In fact, I'm done. I'll be out of your hair by tonight. I can't stay here any longer." He started to leave but Ben cut him off.

"Riley!" he said sharply. The younger man stopped in his tracks, his back turned.

"Please, talk to me."  
"Ben, don't…"

"I just want to help you."  
"Don't do this."

Ben could hear the first break in his voice. He was getting past a barrier but he needed break the wall down further.

"Riley, if you don't tell me, you need to tell somebody. You need see a therapist or something. But you can't keep crap inside."

"Ben…I really…" Riley knew that the man could be as stubborn as a mule. He could be relentless if he really wanted to know something. _Fine. I'll tell him enough to keep him satisfied. _

"My father," he said in an expressionless voice. "I can't stop thinking about it." He was leave again but once more Ben stopped him.

"Thinking about what?"

"What he said…what he meant at the party. 'Things are different now.'"

There was a silence as Ben digested the information. It was all Riley was willing to tell him at the moment and he really hoped Ben wouldn't push him any further.

"Okay," he said quietly. "Thanks Riley."  
His friend looked up and stared tiredly into Ben's face. "For what exactly?"

"For telling me. I know you didn't want to and it was hard for you but you did."

Riley gazed at him for another few moments and shook his head, a pang of guilt jolting his stomach.

He hadn't told Ben the half of it. His father's face haunted him again, that glimpse he saw at the party after so many years. He kept waking up in he middle of the night with tears and sweat drenching his face although he couldn't even remember what he dreamed about. It disturbed him almost to the point of obsession, he couldn't even think about anything else. Memories from his past seemed to be accumulating again and again, it was getting harder to brush them off. And what his father said to him…it killed him. It literally made him sick because every time he thought about it the only thing his mind kept jumping to was all those other times he had beaten the crap out of him.

"Riley?" Ben yanked him back to the present. Riley realized he had been staring blankly through his friend.

"Sorry," he said. He was about to turn and go but he stopped and turned back around.

"Why are you doing this?"  
"Pardon?"  
"Ben, come on. I'm being a royal prick. Why do you even put up with me?"  
Ben tilted his head in an almost confused manner.

"You're my best friend. I told you before Riley, I'm not going to just take off on you."  
"Yeah. Yeah…I guess you did say that, huh?" he said quietly. For a moment he looked considering, then he left the room without another word.

Ben leaned back on the couch and ran a hand over his face. Every time he tried talking to Riley it left him drained. It was so hard watching his closest friend suffer through this. Harder then he would even admit to himself.

Then he had the sudden urge to make a call. Taking out his cell phone he dialed the number. It rang twice before there was an answer.

"Hello?"  
"Hi dad, it's me." Ben said.

"Oh Ben! How are you?"  
"Fine…how's the conference in Boston going?"  
"Good actually. I wasn't laughed off the podium. Strange how finding the world's greatest treasure changes peoples minds, huh?"

Ben chuckled and there was a moment of silence.

"Something you called about?" Patrick asked, hearing no further comment from his son. Ben sighed and held the phone closer to his ear.

"Sort of. I just…want to talk to you." Patrick detected the slight distress in Ben's voice. Only people who knew him well would be able to pick it up, and he heard it.  
"What's wrong?" Patrick asked immediately. "Something happen?"  
"Yeah, uh, it's about Riley. He's-not doing to great."  
"Uh oh. What happened with the kid?"  
"He," Ben cleared his throat. "Um, something happened the other night at the fancy gala I was telling you about. It brought back bad memories he wanted to forget… it really messed with him. And now he's depressed. Like, badly depressed."  
Patrick could hear a catch in Ben's voice and he figured that whatever was happening was worse then Ben was letting on.

"Okay, where's Riley now?"  
"He's staying with me and Abi for a few days."

"Can I talk to him?"

"He's not talking to anyone right now. I practically had to force him to a few minutes ago."  
Patrick let out a breath. It was hard to imagine Riley going through such a hard time.

"He'll come around. Make sure you keep an eye on him Ben. Just be a friend."   
"Yeah, I'm trying. I really am, dad."  
"Good. I wouldn't expect any less from you," Patrick told Ben with evident pride in his voice. Ben smiled despite himself.

"Poor kid though. Sometimes things get rough. He'll pull through though. You'll see. He's made of tougher stuff then we give him credit for."

"Yeah, I know." There was another silence. "Thanks for listening. I just…I needed…to hear your voice right now. That's all."

"You can call me anytime, you know that. It'll turn out all right Ben."

"Yeah. I'll see you soon…" Ben was about to hang up but then paused, "Love you, dad," he said.  
There was the briefest of silences on the other line before his father said back, "Love you too, son. I'll talk to you later."

-

Riley had gone back to his room and had made a decision to leave that day. There was no need for him to be there any longer. He was causing his friends to worry about him, he couldn't take being a burden to them any longer.

Abigail walked in on him packing up his stuff into a suitcase.

"And what do you think you're doing?" she asked. Riley didn't even look at her.

"What's it look like I'm doing Dr. National Archives?"

"If it's what I think it looks like then you need to stop."  
"Well, too bad. I'm going back home."

"You can't go home now, Riley! You're not…" she trailed off. He looked up at her in frustration.

"Not what, Abi? Not capable of taking care of myself? I'm a big boy, I think I can handle things for a while."

"Riley, you know as well as I do that-"

"I'll go and see a shrink if that's what you're so hung up about, okay? I have the freaking money to afford the cream of the crop."  
He turned his attention back to the suitcase and continued throwing clothes into it with increased aggravation.

"Yeowch!" He jerked his hand back as Abigail slammed the suitcase closed, barley missing his fingers.

"You listen to me, and you listen well," she began with a pointing finger. Abigail could be very intimidating when she wanted to be (that side of her usually coming out on Riley more then not). Riley looked at her, seemingly indifferent but now at least she had his full attention. Under normal circumstances he would have been more unsettled, that woman could be ferocious. But at the moment he felt irritated and he crossed his arms over his chest. Abigail knew he wouldn't give in easily to this one.

"You've been less then yourself for the past few days and you have me and Ben worried sick. I don't know what you're thinking or why you believe that you need to go home, but…" she paused before barreling on. "But, if anything happens to you, I don't think either me or Ben would be able to forgive ourselves."

Riley's face flickered with guilt but it passed quickly. "Abi, I'm sorry but-"

He was interrupted when Ben walked into the room after hearing raised voices.

"Is everything okay in here?"  
"Apparently he thinks he's going home."  
Ben's eyes fell on Riley's suitcase and then on the kid. He chose his next words carefully.

"Why are you leaving?"  
Riley was still was feeling guilt more acutely from Abigail's confession. He sighed heavily.

"_This _is why, Ben. We all have lives we need to go back to, it can't all just stop because I'm having issues."

Ben and Abigail exchanged poignant glances with each other and there was a very pregnant pause.

"What?" Riley demanded.

"We don't…want anything to happen to you," Ben said echoing Abigail's earlier statement. Then Riley realized what they were both thinking.

"I'm not going to…do anything… to myself, if that's what you're worrying about." Riley said quietly. It was a reassurance to them but in some ways to himself as well.

"Is that what you were thinking?" he asked his friends sadly. Abigail looked away and Ben wouldn't meet his eyes. It was the underlying fear within both of them, that Riley was having suicidal thoughts. They didn't know whether or not he would act on those impulses either. What were they supposed to think?

"We're just worried Riley," he said after a pause. "You haven't really spoken to us about…since the you told us what happened."

"You just practically made me talk to you. And it's not like you can keep me here forever."

"Okay Riley, look. You have a point; I'll give you that. And if you're this hung up about heading home we can't stop you." Ben said. Riley looked at him in mild surprise. _Well that was easier then I thought_.

"I'll just go stay with you for a while."

Riley's eyes nearly popped out of their sockets.

"Um, excuse me?"  
"Well, this way you get to go home and I get to keep an eye on you. See? We're both happy."  
"No we're not. And it's rude to invent yourself over someone's house."

"You do that all the time with us," Abigail pointed out, much to Riley's annoyance.

Riley suddenly felt more then irritated. He felt angry. His friends did not understand why he was leaving. The guilt and shame that he felt from making his friends practically take care of him, grated on him incessantly. If Ben came with him back home with him it would defeat the whole purpose of him leaving.

"You guys aren't getting it! It's not just the fact that I want to go home, it's the fact that I'm here being a burden to you both and you're both putting up with it when you don't even have to!"  
There was a silence and Riley was still kneeling by the suitcase looking baffled by his own outburst.

"Well, now we're getting somewhere." Abigail said, sounding pleased.

Riley had finally told them something without having to be pressed for the information. Ben figured it would happen sooner or later yet… what his friend had told them disturbed him greatly. He knelt down next to Riley so he could look him dead in his blue eyes.s

"Riley, don't you _ever_ think you're a burden to us. You're…family. So next time it hurts or whatever, tell us because we want to help." Ben was rewarded with the smallest of smiles playing on his friend's lips.

"You must feel like a broken record. Reminding me over and over again."

Ben put a hand on Riley's shoulder. "It's worth it."

Abigail spoke up. "Riley, I'm sorry that I tried to make you stay here. If you're uncomfortable with it you have every right to leave. But…" she bit her lip and sat down on his other side. "Please, take Ben up on his offer to go home with you. It doesn't even have to be for long."

Riley looked at her for a long moment. "I don't know Abi…"

"If not for yourself, do it for me," she persisted, eyes going bright with tears. She didn't want him to be alone. Not now, he needed more time.

Riley paused, still not sure. Deep inside he wanted Ben to come along. But admitting that to himself meant that he was scared.

"I'll stay for four days, since you stayed for four days here," Ben suggested. Riley finally nodded in agreement. "Okay. You both win. Ben gets to be my roomie."

-

The plan was put into action. Ben packed his stuff and threw it in the trunk of his car with Riley's. His friend was muttering to himself, trying to shove his suitcase closed which somehow had come unzipped. He tugged at the batman key chain he attached to the suitcase to try and close it to no avail. Ben who had been watching with mild amusement felt a hand on his back and turned to Abigail. She pulled him a few yards away from the car and kissed him on the lips before embracing him.

"Thank you for doing this," she whispered. "Take care of him."  
Ben nodded holding her close to him. "Don't worry sweetheart. He'll be fine."

Abigail cleared her throat and stepped back.

"Riley, don't think you've gotten rid of me!" she called over to the car. "I'll be over with dinner."

"Perfect!" Riley shouted back, finally slamming closed the truck. He had given up zipping up the suitcase but had taken the batman keychain back as punishment. "Just make sure you don't bring that casserole please?"

Ben got into the driver's side expecting a complaint from Riley. His friend didn't put up a fight, which was unusual. Normally he would jump all over the chance to drive. Ben didn't say anything about it.

After a half hour they were already on the turnpike and Riley was looking out the window watching the scenery flash by. The radio was broadcasting some overplayed song but neither man was really paying attention to it.

"I won't lie, I'm kinda excited for this. It's like having a roommate again. Or it's like a sleep-over." Ben said breaking the silence.  
Riley looked at him incredulously. "Aren't you a little old for that Benjamin Gates?"

"Aren't you a little old for _that_?" Ben said motioning to Riley's batman keychain, which was now dangling out of his pocket. Riley snorted.

"Ben, don't be ridiculous. You're never to old for batman."  
"I'll take your word for it."  
The sky was getting darker and the drove for another fifteen minutes. Ben suddenly leaned on his horn and swerved as another car came barreling past them, cutting them off.

"Idiot! Watch where you're going!" he shouted angrily. Said idiot gave them the finger before driving off. Ben continued to mutter to himself for a while, still driving down the highway.

"Ben, stop the car." Riley suddenly said in a strained voice. Ben glanced at him and was startled to see him paler then usual. Both fists were clenched on the armrests and it looked like was going to be sick.

"Riley?" Ben asked anxiously.

"Stop the car," he said again.

Ben suddenly cursed inwardly, realizing what had just happened. He pulled onto the shoulder. Riley unbuckled his seatbelt and got out. Ben got out as well and hurried toward his friend.

"Oh... Riley," he muttered. He managed to reach his friend just as he doubled over and threw up. Ben rubbed Riley's back, waiting for him to catch his breath. The kid wouldn't look at him, he had his face turned so Ben could only see the back of his head.

"Do…you have any napkins in the car?" he finally asked.

"Yeah, hang on for a second." Ben went back to the car and snatched some napkins from the glove compartment. He handed them to Riley, who was still turned away.

"Thanks."

"You okay?"  
"Yeah." He straightened up trying to hold onto the last shred of dignity he had left. "Let's keep going."  
They both got back into the car and Ben merged back onto the highway.

"I never thought this would be a problem," Riley muttered.

"What do you mean?"  
"Driving. I love driving. You know that Ben. You know I love it."  
"Yeah. I know, Riley," Ben said gently. "I know."

-

For Ben the arrangement for staying at Riley's was convenient in more ways then one and he told his friend at much. It was actually closer to his office where he worked as a researcher for the Historical Society. Riley knew he was saying that to make him feel better about this whole thing.

Ben followed Riley up the stairs to his apartment. Riley turned the key and they both entered.

"Wow, I haven't been in here for a while." Ben commented, looking around the room. It was barely comparable to the pathetically small apartment Riley had been renting out before. At least five of those small apartments could have fit comfortably inside this one.  
"All right. Well I'm beat. You can unpack your stuff and get changed and I'll transmogrify the couch into a bed."

Ben obliged and went into a nearby bathroom to get ready for bed. Riley made the fold out couch and spread sheets over it for Ben. Finished, he sat down to think and then realized thinking was the last thing he wanted to do. When he thought, the only thing that came to mind was his dad's face those frantic last words he shouted when being dragged away. And then those recent memories would be replaced by more distant ones. He would have done anything to forget them. Those moments of blinding pain and fear when all he could do was wish it would be over.

Those remembrances actually made his heart rate go up. They made his freaking heart rate go up even though they happened long ago. He looked at his hands and saw that they were shaking.

"I can't do this…" he moaned to himself, resting his face in his hands. Why did these memories have to haunt him? He was unaware of Ben coming up behind him.

"Riley?" Ben asked. Riley turned to look at him, his face paler then normal.

"Ben. Um, here's your bed. If you need anything, what I have is yours. Just don't finish the milk because I need it with my Captain Crunch. I'm going to turn in."

"Riley…" Ben started and the younger man turned to look at him in an almost exasperated manner.

"If you need anything, I'm right here. Okay?"  
Riley stared at him, a ghost of a smile on his face. It was the reason his friend was staying. Just to be there for him. Neither of them mentioned it but there was a mutual understanding.

"Okay Ben. Good night," he said in a quiet voice.

As he closed the door to his own room asked himself why he had let Ben come when he wanted to try and handle this by himself. But he knew the answer. He was terrified of being alone. It was the pitiable awful truth. The very thought of being alone scared him half to death. And the more he thought why he was afraid, the more paralyzed he became.

-

Ben and Riley went their separate courses during the day, both to their respective jobs. For Riley each day at work was nearly impossible. He couldn't concentrate, he felt sick, and his work was considerably less then what he knew he was capable of. Many times he went into the restroom to get a grip over himself so he could continue the rest of the day.

Ben had guessed as much when he Abigail and Riley were having dinner. The kid always looked dead on his feet. Not only that but he barely touched his food. Ben made the mistake of suggesting he stay longer. Riley had looked deeply wounded and told him that wasn't part of the deal. He realized it was probably hard enough for the kid to acknowledge he really did need someone to look out for him for a few days. And he was glad Riley wasn't pushing him away anymore. Now Riley needed a friend to be there when he fell, and he fell hard sometimes.

The attacks brought on by the disorder were sporadic and frightening to both Riley and Ben. It was relatively new to Ben because Riley had hidden them when he was staying at their house. Now he could tell instantly when his friend was distressed or frightened. Sometimes the disorder manifested itself in panic attacks that Riley mastered within a few minutes. Other times it was worse and that was when Riley had to really draw on his inner strength to fight.

When he felt frozen and overwhelmed it was Ben who had to reassure him he could get through it.

On they evening of the third day of his stay Ben walked in on Riley sitting at his desk, staring blankly at something on the screen. Ben stopped behind him and looked over his shoulder. It took a moment to process what was on the screen.

Riley had somehow managed pull up a file of a newspaper article from nearly a decade before. Ben's eyes widened. The car crash. The newspaper had even provided a picture of it, the wreckage was more sickening then he had imagined. _Oh kid, what would possess you to do this? _Riley's fists were shaking and clenched impossibly tight at his sides, his breath coming in faster.

Ben immediately hit the power button on the computer but Riley didn't even look away from the now black screen. The older man suddenly noticed something that made his heart skip. Blood dripped through Riley's clenched fist.

"Riley, stop it." Ben moved forward to help. His friend suddenly turned toward him looking wild eyed but he didn't let up with his fist.

"Come on now. Open you hand," Ben said in a firmer tone. When Riley didn't respond again Ben reached out and began to uncurl Riley's fingers from his palm. The younger man resisted, trying to pull his hand back.

"Ben-no. No, I need…I can't-" Riley was gasping, gazing at his friend as if he was trying to get him to understand. The only thing that Ben understood at the moment was that Riley was hurting himself and wasn't showing any signs of letting go. He realized that he had to do something before things got any worse. Ben shoved his hand into Riley's not really caring that the blood got on him, taking the brunt of fear and panic's manifestation. He felt Riley's fingernails claw into his own flesh, but he kept his hand there, waiting patiently for Riley to calm down. The grip on Ben's hand was vice-like, almost as if it was the only thing grounding him from falling completely apart.

"I've got you. It's all right," Ben soothed looking into his friend's panicked blue eyes. Finally Riley lessened his crushing grip on Ben. He sat there for another few moments breathing deeply before quickly withdrawing his hand, not wanting his friend to see it. Ben promptly took it back to examine the damage. It was as he thought; Riley had dug his fingernails deep enough in his skin to make them bleed. There were half-moon cuts from where the nails went into the palm.

"Ben, I'm sorry," he moaned. "I-I thought that…I didn't realize-"   
"Relax. Tell me after we wash this off, okay?" No answer.

"Okay?" he asked again.  
"Okay."

They both went into the bathroom and washed to wash the blood off their hands. Riley winced a little when he saw he saw what he had done to himself. The cuts went deeper then he thought. It hurt too but complaining was the last thing he was going to do. Not after a slip like that.

"Band-aids are in the top cabinet," he instructed distractedly to Ben and then realized with a start that his friend was bleeding to.

"Oh no, did I…do that to your hand?" he asked in shock.

"It's fine. These aren't deep." Riley didn't fully believe him.

"Ben-"  
"Riley, it's fine," Ben said in his end-of-discussion voice that Riley hated.

As Riley was dressing his own injuries he kept mentally berating himself for his weakness. At that moment he honestly and truly hated who he was.

When both their hands were patched up Ben crossed his arms and leaned against the doorframe.

"Can you tell why in the world you had that article up?"  
Riley sighed and knew he should have been expecting this. Shrugging he let his eyes fall anywhere but his friend.

"I don't know. Guilt maybe." At Ben's raised eyebrow he continued, "I told you and Abi already that I practically forced myself to not think about what happened. But now that it's…come back, I feel like…it's hard to explain."  
"Take your time."  
"Well…I feel like I should have thought about it. It should have been the only thing I ever thought about. It was how my mom and sisters _died_ Ben. I haven't…" he trailed off, eyes clouding over.

"I don't even know where they're buried. I didn't attend a funeral." he whispered. He stared hard at the floor feeling his hand throb with every heartbeat. An unspoken statement hung in the room. _I never got to say goodbye. _

Both men stood in silence for a while and Ben wanted more then anything to fix it. This wasn't fair. Something like this should have never happened to his best friend.

"Riley, your hand…"  
"I don't know. I felt…like that first night. When you told me I zoned out. It felt like that and I didn't want it to happen again. I felt if I did this," he held up his bandaged hand, "I had some control over myself."  
Ben suddenly felt sick. "You call _that_ control?" he asked with such a mixture of anger and sadness in his voice that Riley was taken aback,  
"That's not good Riley. Please, listen to me. You need professional help. I know me and Abi have been telling you and you've been ignoring us. But…" he shook his head, "You can't go down that path. Just…you need help to learn how to control this crap without resorting to anything foolish."

_Please Riley, this already hurts so much._

A tear rolled down Riley's cheek as he stared at Ben. "I'm sorry," he said. Ben moved forward and pulled him into a hug.

"Don't be sorry. Just take better care of yourself."  
-

It was the last night Ben was staying over and as usual Abigail had come over for dinner. Ben had called her the night before when he was sure Riley was asleep to tell her what happened. He did it partly so she wouldn't freak out at the bandages on his and Riley's hands. When Abigail came into the room he was relieved that her eyes flicked to the hand but she didn't comment, although he saw her tense up.

None of them really said anything and it wasn't only Riley who didn't feel like eating dinner that night. Abigail couldn't take it anymore.

"Riley, are you or are you not going to see a doctor?"  
"Calm down, I will." Riley said, although he really didn't have the intention anytime soon. "I just don't think it's urgent."  
"Then why aren't you eating?" Abigail snapped. Riley glared at her over the table.

"Is it your father?" Ben's question made them both turn to him.

"Ben…"  
"Is it still bothering you, Riley?" Ben persisted. The younger man sighed and nodded in an almost defeated manner.  
"Yes. And if you don't mind, I prefer not to be interrogated."

"What about it is bothering you?" pressed Abigail, ignoring his last statement. Riley crossed his arms but to Ben's great surprise answered her.

"Everything. Everything about it is bothering me. And since you both want to know what I'm thinking so badly, I'll tell you. Because honestly it doesn't even matter to me anymore."

He stood up started to pace, his voice rising steadily with each passing moment.  
"How the crap could things be different? I don't know why he went through all that trouble to get to me, why he waltzes back into my life _now_, now of all times! Why would he show up, to make my life miserable again? Is that what he wanted? Because he's doing a freaking great job of it and it's the only thing I can thing about, what he wanted and I don't _understand-_"  
"Riley." Ben's soft but insistent voice cut through his outburst. Riley realized he had started babbling like an idiot. His hands were shaking and he shoved them in his pockets, hoping no one saw but it didn't go unnoticed. He sat back down looking more defeated then Ben had had ever seen him.  
"I don't think I can ever stop wondering," Riley finished putting his head in his good hand.

The three of them were silent. Then Ben said something that shattered right through it.

"Maybe you should find him."  
"What?" Riley and Abigail asked together in disbelief. Riley shook his head slowly.

"I can't believe you just said that."  
Ben knew he overstepped his bounds but he had to get his point across.

"Riley, it's what's haunting you, right? Maybe the only way to put it at rest is see what he wanted."  
"Ben…" Abigail warned. Riley suddenly stood up shoving the chair away from him.

"What the hell are you saying!?" he shouted looking more angry then either of his friends had ever seen him. Abigail looked unsettled but Ben didn't flinch. This reaction was the first passionate one Ben had seen in a while. He continued to press his case.

"Do you want to go the rest of your life with all these unanswered questions?"  
"Ben!" Abigail yelled. Riley and Ben were both now on their feet with Abigail in the middle.

"Do you realize what you're talking about?" Riley said angrily. "This is the one man I promised myself I would never see again in my life!"  
"Yes, I know Riley but you need to let it go. You can't keep burdening yourself with the past."  
"He put me through _hell_!" Riley shouted and Abigail had to restrain him by putting a hand on his chest. "He was so drunk he didn't even know it was his own son he was beating to a freaking pulp! And now you want me to go find that same guy!"  
"If you do find him it would provide some closure. How will you ever know what he wanted to tell you? All you'll have are speculations. "  
"I thought you of all people would understand, Ben! I thought you had my back on this!"  
"Riley, I do! I have your best interests in mind, and you can't keep holding onto the past. I've seen how it hurts you! You have to let it go."

Riley stood there looking furiously at Ben, breathing heavily. It looked like he was about to say something else but then he turned on his heel and stormed from the kitchen. They heard him going into his room and slam the door. Ben was about to follow him but Abigail put her arms around his.

"Let him go Ben," she said softly.

Ben stood there a little numbly. "But he needs help. It'll never stop until he faces it."  
Abigail pulled her husband to her. "I know, sweetheart. But there are some things you can't help him with. He needs to make these decisions on his own."

-

Riley paced angrily in his room. He kicked the nightstand and let out a frustrated groan before sitting on the bed. Who did Ben think he was anyway? He knew the story; he knew what Riley had been through. So the why did he want Riley to go face the man caused him so much pain in his past?

In his trembling heart, Riley knew why. He knew, he knew too well. It was the reason why he was so angry. Ben was right. He was always right apparently. Riley didn't want to admit it, even to himself. But it was true. His father was tormenting him even though he wasn't even there. The man would never leave him alone.

It consumed him, pushed him further down and all he had were the questions that left no satisfaction.

But looking for his dad had been a taboo thought in his own mind it took someone like Ben Gates to vocalize it for him. All excuses had run out. It was an option that made the most sense.

_But I can't…I don't want to go find him. _Riley thought desperately. _This can't be the way. It just can't. Oh God, help me. _

For the first time in a while Riley almost prayed.

-

Ben hesitated before knocking on Riley's door. There was a pause before a muffled voice said, "Come in."

He entered Riley's room and saw his friend sitting on the bed, watching him. He looked as if he had been crying but Ben didn't comment on it.

"Riley, I'm sorry. I pushed you too hard. It was wrong of me, you don't need to do anything you aren't ready to do."

Riley shook his head and motioned Ben to sit next to him.

"No Ben, it's okay. The thing is I'll never be ready to do that." Ben sighed and sat down next to Riley.  
"But you're right. As always. It'll never leave me alone." There was a heavy silence.

"What are you going to do?" Ben finally asked. Riley stared at his hands, his eyes lingering on the injured one.

"I'm going to go find him."

"Yeah?"  
"Yeah."   
Ben felt a lump in his throat as he looked at his friend. His friend who despite all the crap he was going through somehow found the resolve to do this.

"Riley, I'm so proud of you," Ben said thickly. He drew Riley's head onto his shoulder. He felt his friend shudder and clear his throat, forcing down his emotions.

"That's such a courageous thing you did. In fact I'd say its braver then when you helped me steal the Declaration."  
"Ben, that wasn't bravery that was just being crazy"  
"Well, sometimes they go hand in hand."  
"You're telling me."  
Ben ruffled his hair and when Riley spoke again Ben could hear confusion in his voice.  
"But I can't really be brave, can I? I don't feel it. I mean, honestly I'm scared. Very, very scared."  
"Riley, if you weren't, I would wonder what's wrong with you. And FYI, courage is when you're scared out of your mind, but you go through with whatever anyway."

He would have given him examples of great people in history that had overcome odds but clamped his mouth shut on that one. He waited for Riley to talk instead.

"Will you…will you help me do this?" he asked almost hesitantly.  
"Of course, I will" Ben answered immediately. Riley leaned a little more heavily on Ben's shoulder. "I know. I don't even know why I ask."  
-

A/N: This took forever to write. As far as chapters go…meh. Tell me what you think anyways. Listening to "How to Save A Life" by The Fray. I think it goes well with this chapter.


	6. The Clues

A/N: Thanks for the reviews :-D They mean a lot! Hope you like this chapter!

-

"Riley!" Abigail called from the other room. Riley sighed and pushed his glasses up the bridge of nose. They had been slipping steadily downward for the last five minutes and Riley was debating weather he wanted to lift his hands from the keyboard to his face. Abigail's persistent voice made the decision for him. She always complained that he needed his glasses tightened.

_Oh well. _Now _what does she want? _Riley thought in annoyance. A lot of things seemed to annoy him lately. More then usual.

"Riley!" Abigail shouted again.

"Wh-aat?" Riley yelled back, no intention of leaving his computer. He heard grumbling and the blond marched into his room looking rather peeved.

"Are you going to have lunch?"  
Riley barely restrained a groan. Lunch was something he didn't have the luxury to think about. He decided to toss meat to the tiger, keep it happy.

"I will. I just need to do a few more things here," he answered, his eyes not leaving the luminous glow of the computer screen.

"Uh-huh. That's what you said yesterday. You never had lunch."  
"I did so!"  
"Right. A granola bar. That's all you had. All day."  
"Not true. I had…food. For dinner."  
"Riley…" He groaned inwardly when he heard concern bubbling under the surface of her outwardly irritated lecture. "You're not eating right. Ben told me that you're hardly sleeping. And you're spending your waking hours in front of…" she motioned to his computer in contempt, "That infernal contraption."  
"Hey! Don't call it that! You're hurting its feelings." He placed his hands on either side of the monitor as if it had ears.

"Don't listen to her Compy."  
"Annnd you gave it a name. Swell."  
"Abi, computers are delicate creatures that must be treated with care," Riley said petting the monitor with affection. Abigail swallowed what would have been a very unhelpful string of words. Wait a minute, how did they get so off topic? _Dammit Riley,_ she thought.

"Okay. Okay, let's back up for a moment." Running a hand through her hair, she thought about the best way to put this. Talking to an uncooperative Riley was usually infuriating enough. But now Riley was uncooperative to the point where it was getting dangerous for his own health.

"Just answer me this. How often have you been eating?"  
"Why don't you tell me? You and Ben have been practically living here." It was true. Both the Gates stopped by nearly everyday. If they couldn't stop by they would call, and Riley began to suspect that they enjoyed pestering the heck out of him. Although he whined about their frequent pop-ins , inside his was grateful beyond words that they didn't leave him alone. They still kept their promise and they didn't leave him.

"_Riley_…" Riley pretended to ignore what he was sure were German curses muttered under Abigail's breath. He was making it hard on her. He knew that but he couldn't seem to stop himself. She stalked out of the room and Riley returned to his typing. Then she came back in, an apple in one hand.

"Eat this Riley. Just eat this apple. You need energy."

"If you put it on the desk, I'll eat it later."  
"I want to see you eat it now."  
She saw him squirm slightly in his seat and knew she was making him uncomfortable. But he needed to eat, even if he had to be force-fed. She knew from experience that in situations like these you couldn't give the person an inch.

"Abi, you don't…" Riley began. "You don't understand!" He eyed the apple and looked angrily at her. And she quite honestly understood his aversion to it and the anger that came when people tried to force you to eat. It may have been different reasons, but she understood. And she decided to switch tactics. Riley didn't need her rounding on him like a vulture. He needed someone who understood.

"Riley, believe it or not, I know how you feel, not wanting to eat." She couldn't believe she was telling him this. She had never told anyone, not even Ben. She was too much of a proud person to admit her struggles. Yet now she had to lay aside her pride and speak up on behalf of her friend,

Riley was looking up at her in confusion.

"From sixth to eighth grade I struggled with an eating disorder. I was in and out of the hospital a few times. And I know-" she began when a look of protest came over his face, "I know you don't have anorexia or anything. But you've developed a strong distaste for food because of the stress and anxiety you're under. And I understand to some degree how hard it is to force yourself to eat."  
Riley was speechless for a few moments. He had been totally wrong about Abigail. She honestly knew what it was like, even more painfully then he did. He stood up from his desk and hung his head a little. The guilt and self-loathing made their way to the surface again.

"Abi, I'm sorry…" he began. There was a desperate apology written all over his face. "I wish I could…but every time I try and eat…I can't. I just can't."

"Stay there. Don't move for a second." She quickly went into the other room and picked up a knife from the utensil draw and a plate and walked back into Riley's room.

"We're going to take this slowly, okay?" she said quietly. Riley nodded, listening to whatever she was about to say.

"I'm going to cut this into thin slices. It'll be easier to eat, then to bite into the whole apple." She began to cut through the green skin with delicate precision. Riley watched a little warily, knowing he would have to eat the fruit. Finally she stopped and separated the slices in half on the plate.

"Half for you, half for me," she said with a smile. She took a piece and nodded for Riley to do the same. He took the little section and looked down at it, the white flesh on the inside of the apple wet in his hand. Then he brought it to his mouth and bit off a little bit. It was sour and tangy. He also was having a difficult time swallowing it. Abigail was eating her piece slowly as well, almost seeming to match him chew for chew. Finally he got it down and smiled a little bit. He took another piece and raised it to Abigail who did the same thing with her next piece. They touched the fruit sections together.

"Cheers."  
-

Later that day Ben finished work and joined the other two at Riley's house. Ben had stressed he wanted to be there when Riley was pulling up information about his father. Riley knew it was because of that incident when he looked up the car crash. He still kicked himself every time he thought about it. He had lost it, puncturing his own hand. It could have been worse if Ben hadn't been there to calm him down. What really tore at Riley was the fact the he had hurt Ben as well. Every so often he would ask Ben how his hand was and Ben would show him and Riley felt overwhelming guilt and apologize all over again and Ben would tell him to shut up. Then Ben would look at Riley's hand, study the scars and smile at his friend. "It's healing," is what he said every time.

Riley couldn't afford another slip up like that. Not again, the expression on Ben's face still haunted him and he was already making everything so difficult for his friends.

It was that incident that made him for the first time seriously consider going to a doctor. He made the mistake of mentioning it out loud and Abigail was almost ecstatic. Both his friends had been pressuring him to get professional help. Riley said that he would. Eventually. It wasn't exactly at the top of his to-do list.

At the moment he was completely engrossed on finding out what happened to his father. Riley didn't care weather or not he was alive or dead, he just needed to know what happened.

How hard was it to find his father? Answer: the guy was like freaking Bigfoot. It had been nearly two weeks since he made the decision to search for him. And his search was coming back fruitless. First he had tried every legal trick he could think of. He made calls to the police station, asked for records, talked to the security guards who threw his father out. It was no good. Everything came back as a blank slate. He didn't want to resort to hacking, he really didn't.

Riley let out a frustrated sigh and leaned back in his chair.

"Any other ideas?" Ben asked who was sitting nearby and scribbling something down in a notebook.

"Well, yeah. But, uh, it's kind of…"

Ben looked up a little skeptically, "Kind of what?"  
"Illegal."  
"Ah. Well, when has that stopped us before?"

Abigail looked very annoyed. "Ben," she admonished, "_Try _and set an example?"  
Ben was the kind of person who was adamantly for doing the right thing. In fact he was so into doing the right thing he would break a few laws to get it done. And if it meant stealing the Declaration of Independence, that was peachy. Ben certainly was a paradox on two legs. Sometimes he reminded Riley of the main characters in some of the old spaghetti westerns he watched.

"I don't know Ben. I don't really want to use my powers for evil this time around."  
"'Powers for evil?'"

"Sure. _With great power comes great responsibility. _I'm like Spiderman."  
"Spiderman."  
"No seriously. I'm like Spiderman and you're like Batman. Because you break the law and Batman leans more toward the anti-hero-"

"Hey, what am I?" Abigail asked.

"You're like, Jean Gray."  
"Nice. I can live with that."

"Okay, okay," Ben broke into the steadily more ridiculous conversation. "I get it. Let's just hear what you were going to do."  
"Okay." Riley took a deep breath and crossed his arms. "I was going to access his criminal records. It would require me to hack into the state penitentiary database."

Ben nodded and delicately interlaced his fingers. "Whatever you choose, we're right behind you."

Riley blinked over at them as suddenly a wave of weariness caught up with him.

"Um, I'm going to think about it for a little while," he decided, standing up.

"Take all the time you need." Abigail said with a smile. They both couldn't miss the way his whole demeanor seemed to droop as he walked out of the room. When he was out of sight, Ben rested his head in his hands and Abigail took his arm and leaned against him.

"It's not fair. This isn't right." Abigail said sadly.

"He shouldn't have to deal with this," Ben muttered in agreement.

-

The issue wasn't hacking. Not entirely. He had done it countless times before, for Ben mostly. It was different now because this was something personal. It wasn't ground breaking, not "the Declaration of Independence is going to be stolen" kind of deal.

This was….he couldn't lie to himself at the moment, although he had been doing that often for the last few weeks. If he was quite honest to himself, it was because information about his father was going to be waiting for him in pixel form on the other side of the computer monitor.

But he needed to get to the bottom of this. Everything. Ben was right. He needed closure. It didn't have to be a happy ending; it just needed to be an ending.

He walked down the stairs of his apartment and walked out onto the street. Then he walked over to his sports car and ran a hand over its red surface. He missed riding that stupid car so much. It broke him up that he didn't even have the durability to drive without pulling over to the side of the road anymore. It was just another thing that came along with the nightmares, lack of appetite… he didn't feel like himself and he hated it. Everything added up to avoiding what had happened. He wasn't a fool, he knew even if he finally did talk to his father, close the book, he would probably never be able to put everything fully behind him. There would still be scars. But scars meant healing. And scars were preferable to open wounds.

-

Ben and Abigail looked up as Riley walked back into the room. He seemed to have an air of resolve to him.

"I'm going to do it. I need to see what happened to him." He sat himself in front of the computer and his fingers began to fly over the keyboard. Ben could keep up with what Riley was doing better then Abigail because of his background in engineering. But he even got lost after a while.

"Okay got it," Riley finally said. A list appeared on the screen and Riley clicked to scroll down. Ben suddenly spoke up.

"Riley, are you going to…" Ben began but stopped, his eyes lingering on the younger man with concern. Riley realized that Ben was worried he would freak out like he did when viewing the picture o the car crash. He shook his head, more determined.

"I'm fine."

Riley scrolled down…Poole…Poole, Jonathan. There he was. Riley hesitated and clicked on the file.

The image that was brought up showed a man in his late fifties; graying brown hair impossibly blue eyes just like Riley's. Ben and Abigail leaned closer. They had never seen any of Riley's relatives before and as far as any of them knew he had none except for his father.

Riley swallowed hard and his eyes quickly scanned over the information. Abigail placed a hand on his arm.

"Well, the last time he was in jail was when…"  
"When?"  
Riley closed his eyes briefly. "When we had that huge fight. His jail time was cut short to one year…but he was put on probation."  
Riley continued to scan the information. Then he stopped short.

"This doesn't make sense."  
"What doesn't?"  
"He falls off the chart."  
"Pardon?"  
"He…according to this he doesn't exist. There are no more records of if he moved or bank accounts. Nothing. It's like he fell off the face of the planet."  
Abigail titled her head to the side. A thought suddenly accorded to her.

"Maybe he doesn't exist-"  
"Abigail, I know I'm kind of having issues right now but I'm not schizophrenic or anything-"

"Riley, relax! You never let me finish. Maybe your father doesn't exist according to society. Maybe he's homeless."  
"Homeless?"   
"Yes. It makes sense I think. Finding employment is difficult if you have a prison record. Plus, he didn't have any family or resources that could help him out. That kind of thing."

Riley seemed deep in the thought and he ran a hand over his face. Fine stubble was growing in from not shaving in a while.

"Yes. That does make sense Abi. Something you said actually made sense."  
"Well, thanks," Abigail said, rolling her eyes.

"At the party…his clothes looked…it was hard to miss, especially at such a formal gathering. He looked like he was homeless."

He sighed and took off his glasses, rubbing his eyes. Ben spoke up, looking thoughtful.

"If he doesn't have an address or anything…it could be extremely difficult to fin him. He could be anywhere," he said slowly.

"I know. That's exactly what I was thinking," Riley groaned. A thought occurred to him that he was hoping he didn't need to follow up on. _Darn it!_

"Although…there is another option. To get information."  
"Is it legal," Abigail asked testily.

"Yes Abigail. It's legal. But unpleasant."

"What is it?"

Ben glanced at Riley and saw his blue eyes looking at him. It seemed like a silent message, _I really need you for this one Ben._

"Are you up for paying a visit to my foster parents?" Riley asked.

-

"Okay, so you should know some things before you meet them," Riley was saying to Ben as they walked down the street. Ben was a little distracted as he was trying to make his way through the crowd. Two or three people stopped him to talk with him. Riley rolled his eyes and waited for him to finish a conversation with some treasure-hunting enthusiast.

"Were you even listening?" Riley asked irritably.

"I'm listening Ri, just keeping the fans happy." Ben said with a grin. He turned his full attention back to Riley who looked miffed at him.

"Sorry, sorry, I was just joking. Keep talking."

"Okay, as I was _saying_,their names are Daniel and Meredith Grosser. And just…keep in mind that they're a little…"  
"A little what?"  
"Well, let's just say we try and keep out relationship on a Major Holiday basis."  
"Major Holiday?"  
"We only see each other on major holidays. You know, Christmas…uh, actually that's it. We see each other once a year, a few days before Christmas, and believe me it works out well for all of us."   
Ben let out a silent "ohh" of understanding. "You don't get along with them."

"You can say that."  
"What happened when they found out about the treasure?" Ben wanted to know.  
"It's actually hard to believe but they don't treat me any differently."  
"Well that's good right?" the older man asked with a sense of false hope.

"In any other case, yeah. In this case, no. Don't get me wrong though," he added a little reluctantly. "The reason I haven't totally broken connections with them is…well, because even though we don't get along…they still gave me a home, food, somewhere to sleep for three years. How they were qualified to become foster parents, I don't know, but they opened their house to me. I could have ended up with much worse people."

Riley grew quiet again and as they continued down the street. Ben wondered if they gave Riley security that comes with having a family. But he concluded if they did, it was superficial. The way Riley spoke about them was a clue enough.

"Okay, they're about ten minutes away on Clifford Avenue." Riley pointed in the direction. He knew the area well, living here for three years. Everywhere he looked he would remember a day where he went to that restaurant…or went to that comic book store. He always felt a sense of familiarity with the sights he recognized and oddly saddened when he saw some of the buildings taken down.

Riley continued to walk alongside Ben when suddenly an overwhelming dizziness forced him to stop. He swayed and would have fallen to the concrete if Ben had not reflexively reached over and caught him around his waist.  
"Are you okay?" Ben asked, helping Riley stand up straight. Riley shook his head clear of the lightheadedness that made the street tilt nauseatingly.

"Um, yeah I should be." Riley mumbled. Ben scrutinized him. Suddenly something clicked. When he grabbed his friend around the waist he could feel his ribs. His face was too sunken for it just to be lack of sleep. It wasn't hard to put the pieces together. Exhaustion plus malnutrition had finally caught up with the kid. Abigail had warned him about Riley's dangerous eating habits. Ben cursed himself for not getting food into Riley's stomach sooner.

"Riley, when was the last time you've eaten?" Ben asked in a low voice. People were casting them annoyed looks as they walked around the two men standing in the middle of the sidewalk.

"Uh, well…I…" Riley fumbled around a bit. Ben glared at him.

"Yesterday." It was the truth; he had something to eat yesterday. "That means I'm not starving myself. I had something to eat yesterday, it counts for something, right?"

"That remains to be seen. What did you have to eat?" Riley looked down at the sidewalk, eyes studying dried up gum.

"Half an apple." He winced when he heard Ben let out a deep breath.   
"Abigail told me about that. She also told me the day before that you had only a granola bar. And the day before that half an energy drink."

"What the heck? How does she know that?"  
"That's not the point. The point is, you need something in your system. You are completely running yourself down, Riley. This is dangerous, you should be getting help."

Geeze, why couldn't the guy yell at him like a normal person? Riley shifted his eyes and met Ben's gaze and immediately recoiled them back to the sidewalk.

He continued staring at the ground. That gum was definitely disgusting. It looked like it used to be lime green.

"Please Ben, you don't have to worry about it. Lord knows how much you've helped me already. You don't need to concern yourself with this too."  
Ben didn't seem to hear the second part of his statement.

"You're the one who always loves food so much. And now you almost pass out on the street from not eating. And you don't want me to worry about that?"  
"Yes?" Riley asked hopefully.

"Guess again kiddo. Come on."  
"Where are we going?" Riley asked, following Ben. His friend didn't answer him, just kept walking, eyes scanning the various buildings.

"BEN! Wait up!"

-

Ben had managed to practically drag Riley into a nearby diner. Riley was giving Ben the silent treatment, arms crossed and shooting Ben angry glares. A waiter came up and smiled at the both of them.

"Two?"  
"Yes thank you," Ben said. He gave Riley a sharp nudge and his friend grumbled but followed the waiter to a nearby booth. The both sat down across from each other. The waiter handed them the menus and left.

"Ben…" Riley whined breaking his vow of silence.

"Riley, you need food in your system. You can't visit your foster parents if you have no energy."

Riley let out a frustrated groan. There was no way Ben could understand like Abigail had. Food lost all appeal to him. Every time he sat in front of something to eat it, it literally made him nauseous.

The waiter came along again. "Can I start you off with some drinks?"

"Actually, I'm ordering the food now. Can we have two bowls of chicken noodle soup?"

"Is that it?"

"Yes, that's it."  
The waiter looked at him a little strangely but took their menus and left.  
Riley looked like he wanted to hurt Ben for a moment. "What are you, my nutritionist?"

"No, just a friend who doesn't want to see you faint in the middle of a street."

Ben saw a flicker of gratitude run across Riley's face only followed by guilt and irritation. Ben looked at his friend and for the hundredth time took in his broken appearance. Riley seemed almost a shadowy version of what he used to look like.

The soups came quickly and were placed in front of them. Riley looked at his. The smell didn't seem particularly mouth-watering but it didn't disgust him. That was something, right?  
He took his spoon and dipped it into the broth. It actually almost made it to his mouth but then he felt sick. Setting the spoon down again, he shook his head. "I can't."  
Ben didn't give an inch. "You will."

Both men sat with steaming bowls of soup, glowering at each other. The waiter decided to skip their table for a while.

"Riley, you need to eat. I can sit here all day if I need to." Ben said lightly. Riley knew he would to.

"Benjamin Franklin Gates, you sometimes make me want to pull out my fingernails one by one," Riley said looking sullenly at his bowl.  
"Uh-huh. I love you too Riley. Eat your soup."

Ben began to slowly sip his, not really looking at Riley. He didn't want to make Riley feel like he was some sort of freak (although he was pretty sure his friend already felt uncomfortable). That was part of the reason why he ordered his own soup. So Riley wouldn't be so much in the spotlight.

Riley stared at his soup for a while and realized that he really did need to eat, no matter how much he hated to admit it. He remembered how Abigail had helped him eat, one little piece of apple at a time. He took the spoon again and ladled some broth into it. He'll work on that for now. He sipped it. It almost felt like he was choking it down but he managed to swallow.

Ben was only watching this out of the corner of his eye. It broke his heart. Riley would normally eat that soup for an appetizer to a main course, now he could barely ingest it.

Ben began to talk casually with Riley, asking him about the neighborhood. And Riley talked just as easily back. It was as if both of them were trying to make this a normal outing to eat between two friends. And for about fifteen minutes it felt quite close to it. But Ben couldn't miss how each spoonful seemed to be a struggle for Riley to get down his throat.

After a while Riley finally put down his spoon. "I can't eat anymore, Ben."

Ben glanced at the bowl. Halfway done. Not too bad. "Okay. I'll give you a break for now." Riley looked immensely relieved.

"But you need to keep eating regularly." Ben continued in a paternal tone.

Riley stared out the window in silence as Ben asked for the check, lost in his own thoughts for a little while.

Ben turned to Riley. "Do you feel better?" he asked. Riley considered. The soup was sitting heavily in his stomach, it almost felt like it was cramping up. But his head felt clearer and he had a little more energy. "Yeah, actually. I think so." Riley admitted. Ben smiled. "Good. Tell me if you're getting dizzy again."

"Right," said Riley dubiously.

"I mean it Riley. You need to tell me." Ben stressed. "I don't want you passing out and having to go to the hospital. That's the last thing either of us need right now."  
"Okay Ben, I'll tell you," Riley said. Ben suddenly almost laughed in relief to see a smile on Riley's face.

"Alright. Let's go visit these Grosser people of yours."  
"I always liked that name."  
"Grosser. Hah."

"Mature Ben. Real mature."  
-  
Ben and Riley both stood on the front steps to the Grosser's household. Riley gave Ben a look. "Let me do the talking, okay?"  
"Yes sir," Ben smirked Riley rolled his eyes and rang the doorbell. He stepped back and they both waited.   
"Daniel, go get the door!" came a shriek from the inside. There was a loud muttering and a foot stomping and the door opened. A man in his early fifties, overweight balding and not in a pleasant mood stood there.

"Look if you guys are trying to sell something or are those Jehovah's Witness-"  
"Mr. Grosser, it's me Riley."  
Then man did a double take. "Riley! What are you doing here? It's not Christmas already is it?" He looked vaguely panicked.  
"Uh, no-"  
"Who is it? If it's another girl scout I swear…" An elderly woman who wore too much lipstick poked her head out of the door. "Riley? What are you doing here? And who is _that_?" She gave Ben a once over and seemed quite enamored by his appearance.  
Ben raised his eyebrows but didn't say anything about the less then warm and slightly eccentric welcoming reception.

"Look, can we come in? I just want to ask you some questions." Riley said impatiently.

"Yes, yes. Come in. I'll start some tea." Meredith hustled them into the living room and sat them down on a couch. It was quite uncomfortable being that it was covered in plastic. Mr. Grosser seated himself across from Riley and Ben and crossed his arms.

"For heaven's sakes Riley. You look like crap. Couldn't find a nice girl to take care of you yet?"

_Wow. Okay. _Ben thought. Riley glanced over at him and saw a shocked expression on his face.

_I should have prepared him better _thought Riley glumly.  
Mrs. Grosser came into the room with the tea. "Here you go. So who's your friend?"  
"Right. This is Benjamin Gates-"

"Ooh, the treasure hunter. Good to finally meet you." Mrs. Grosser cooed.   
"So are you two together?"  
Ben who had been drinking the tea to give himself something to do, choked on it. Riley nearly let his forehead smash into the coffee table in front of him. He was feeling increasingly worse for dragging Ben into this. Apparently his ex-foster father had missed the gold wedding band around Ben's ring finger.

"No Mr. Grosser," he said wearily. "He's my friend, helping me do some-"  
"Well it would explain a few things, like why you aren't married yet."

"I'm not gay Mrs. Grosser."

"And what in the world, you look like you're one of those…what do you call them Daniel?"  
"Goths I think."  
"You are skin and bones. Pale too. Is this a new look for young people or something?"  
Ben was getting angrier by the minute. These people were crossing the line from bothering Riley to harassing him. Riley seemed more annoyed then anything else but Ben could sense he was getting increasingly desperate to ask the questions and get out of there. Ben finally cut in.

"Mr. and Mrs. Grosser, with all do respect, Riley just needs to ask you some questions."  
Riley crossed his arms and sighed deeply. _Oh boy. Laser beams diverted elsewhere._

"So why are you here again Mr. Gates? "

"If you were listening, Mrs. Grosser, I'm here to help Riley get some answers to questions."

"Mr. Grosser snorted. "Don't you have more important things you should be doing…with that treasure you found? Why are you wasting your time on him? Me and Meredith did for three years. Hopeless case. Except for that whole treasure thing."

For the first time since the visit, Riley looked slightly wounded by the comment. And Ben just about had it with these people. He sometimes wondered why Riley wouldn't talk about his foster parents, but now he knew.

"Riley is my best friend," he began in a dangerous voice, "In fact, he's like a brother to me. And he's going through hard time right now, and the last thing he needs is you people giving him shit." Riley looked at Ben a little startled. The man never cursed.  
"So how about you both shut the hell up and listen to him for once, let him ask the questions, and we can all be on our merry way."

Both the Grossers were quiet for a few moments and then Mr. Grosser shrugged.

"Sounds like a plan to me," he said indifferently. Ben sighed and leaned back on the couch. These people were so infuriately rude and insensitive he could hardly believe it. Riley gave him a grateful look before clearing his throat.

"Okay, let me just get down to it. Have you heard anything about my father? Where he might be living, if he was seen anywhere?"  
"Jonathan?" Mrs. Grosser frowned. "Why would you want to know about him? You were handed to us because of that man. He beat you and threw you down a staircase if you don't remember."  
Riley closed his eyes for a second. Ben looked at him at out the corner of his eye. "Yes, I actually do recall. Please, just answer my question."

They both sat in silence, not looking like they were particularly thinking to hard about the question. Mr. Grosser suddenly spoke up. "Oh right! It was almost two months ago. Showed up on our door."  
"He was _here_?" Riley asked in disbelief. "Right here, and you didn't even…" He sighed and waited for the man to continue.

"Wanted to know where you were. I said I'd be damned if I knew. He wanted to talk to you about something."  
"What did he want to talk about?" Riley asked tensely.

"Didn't say. I threatened to call the cops on him and he left."  
Riley almost groaned. This whole trip had been in vain.

"He didn't say where he was going, anything like that?" Ben tried.

"No, just up and left."

"Okay, well sorry to take up your time. We'll be leaving now." Riley said standing up.  
"Goodbye Riley. Good luck in whatever you're doing." Mrs. Grosser said as Ben and Riley walked to the door.

"Thanks, goodbye," Riley said and closed the door behind him.

-

Ben kept giving sidelong glances to his friend as the walked back to the car. Riley hadn't said anything since they stepped out of his ex-foster parent's house.

"Hey, Riley," Ben said. "Are you…what's on your mind?"

"I'm sorry I dragged you along with me Ben." Riley muttered. "I was hoping they would cool off a little bit because I had a guest. I guess not. And it was all for nothing."

"Riley…"  
"Ben?"  
"What is it?"  
"Am I really…" Riley looked sadly up at his friend. "Is helping you find the treasure all I'm worth? Maybe he's right. Maybe I am hopeless. "  
""Riley!" Ben was shocked. Out of all the comments hurled at him that one was the one that seeped through. "No…Riley, no. Don't think that. You can't listen to what they say."  
"But what if…"  
"Riley," Ben said gently. He moved in front of the young man and put a hand on his shoulder. "Do you think I'm doing this because you're a computer geek with crazy good hacking abilities? First and foremost you're my best friend, my little brother. And nothing anyone says will ever change that."

Riley's lips quirked upward. "So you meant what you said back there. About me being your brother?"

"Every word."

Riley stood looked at Ben for a long while and tilted his head to the side. "You know, you're freakin' scary when you get mad. And I don't think I ever heard you curse before. It doesn't suit you by the way. But, uh…thanks for sticking up for me."  
Ben shook his head and Riley could tell he was still angry when he thought about them.

"Hey, those people were absolutely ridiculous. I couldn't take it anymore, they just made me so mad." He sighed. "Although I'm not sure how much my little outburst helped in the long run."

"Just the fact that the _answered _my question proved that you shook them up a little bit. It may have not seemed that way, but no one ever talks to them like how you just did."

Ben felt anger stir in his gut again.

"I was not expecting such horrible behavior from them," he growled.

"They took me in, Ben. They're not that bad."  
"Why are you defending them even after they treated you abusively for three years?"  
"No!" Riley looked at Ben, shocked and slightly hurt. "They never touched me."

"Maybe, but there is such a thing as verbal abuse. And don't give me that sticks and stones crap."  
"Ben…" Riley stopped and put a hand over his face. Ben groaned with a sudden feeling of guilt. He had spoken out of turn, overstepped his bounds again.

"Riley, I'm so sorry. That was inappropriate. I shouldn't have said those things, I was just really angry. I didn't mean to upset you."

Riley shook his head and started walking again. "It's okay Ben. It's just that…I guess… …after my dad….they didn't seem so bad in comparison."

Ben remained silent and walked in step next to his friend. Then Riley stopped short after a few paces. He blinked and a shadow of heartache passed over his face.

"I miss my family."  
The comment was almost casual sounding but Riley was staring vacantly ahead. He stood there; pale, looking like a gust of wind could knock him over. People walked around them, laughing, talking, unaware of the private hell that consumed this young man. Ben put a gentle arm around him and guided him the last block back to the car. Riley looked at it and Ben felt a shudder go through his friend. But he climbed into the passenger side and buckled his seatbelt without saying anything.

"I'm going to stay at your apartment for a little bit, after we get there. Okay Riley?" Ben said, making sure the worry he was feeling didn't slip into his voice.  
Riley nodded mutely, seeming disconnected to everything. He had withdrawn into his own mind again. Ben sighed quietly and started the car.

-

As soon as they got back Riley went into his room and closed the door. Ben took out his cell phone, held down the speed dial for Abigail's number and waited for her to pick up.

"Sweetheart," she greeted, "How did the visit go?"

"Um, I don't really know actually. His foster parents were horrible to him, they kept making these comments…" Ben sighed and sank into a chair. "I kind of lost it and told them off because I was so angry." He heard Abigail laughing on the other line. "What's so funny?"

"I wish I could have seen that," she said and Ben could sense her smirking. "You're pretty sexy when you go on one of your little outbursts."  
"Funny because Riley said I was frightening. That was more of the effect I was going for."  
"So what happened? Did you find out anything about his father?"

"No, not that much. Apparently he stopped at their house looking for Riley, wanting to talk with him. It was about a month before he showed up at the party."  
"So do you think confronting Riley at the part was a desperate measure?"

Ben crossed his arms and stared at Riley's closed door. "Maybe. Whatever he wanted to say….it must have been extremely important to him…after all he got into a party with so much security."

There was a pause before Abigail asked in a soft voice, "Is Riley okay?"  
"He's…he's been distant again. I think today was too much for him. I'm staying here for a little while to make sure he's okay."  
"Riley…oh god Ben." Abigail said in a suddenly tearfully voice. She almost sounded like she was going to cry. "This can't be happening to him."  
"I know. I know, sweetheart. He'll be okay. He'll pull through." Ben murmured.   
"Take care of him?"

"Haven't stopped. Call you later, okay?"  
"Okay, I love you Benjamin."  
"I love you too sweetheart," Ben whispered. He clicked off the phone and ran a hand through his hair. His instincts told him it was going to be long night.

Almost immediately after this thought he heard Riley cry out. Ben nearly sprang out of his chair toward Riley's bedroom.

"Bad night," he muttered sympathetically.

He opened the door and the hall light cut across the darkened room to Riley's bed where he was tossing and turning, whimpering in his sleep. Sweat covered his face and plastered his hair to his forehead. Ben walked over and sat on the edge of the bed, desperately wanting to spare him from the nightmare. This was the first time he walked in while Riley was still in the grips of a dream. Usually his friend was awake by the time he came into the room.

It was against his better judgment but he cautiously placed a hand on Riley's shoulder to wake him. Immediately Riley sat bolt upright, instinctively shoving Ben's hand off of him and shrinking back against the wall. A heartbreakingly trapped expression was on his face. Ben instantly took a few backward steps and held out his hands where Riley could see them. His friend still had that same cornered look, a slight wildness to his eyes.

"It's okay, it's just me. I'm sorry I frightened you."

For a few seconds they stared and each other silently, only broken by Riley's sped up breathing. It was long enough for Ben's anxiousness to climb. Then Riley seemed to come to himself, shaking his head a few times to clear the last remnants of the nightmare.

"Sorry," he gasped. "Just another…bad dream."

Ben had a good guess of what Riley was dreaming about. He could only imagine the horror Riley had to put up with when he was younger and everything in him screamed he needed to make it better. He wanted to protect Riley, but he couldn't protect him from something that already happened.. It made him feel like he was failing his little brother because that was what Riley was to him.

Ben took a step forward but Riley held up a hand, stopping him.

"Hang on…for a second…sorry Ben."  
So Ben stayed where he was, watching as Riley struggled to get his breathing under control.

"Riley, are you okay?" he asked in that soft concerned way. In answer his friend leaned forward and turned a shade paler.

"Are you going to be sick?" Ben asked, taking another step forward. He wanted to give Riley his space if he needed it but it was difficult to just stand and watch. Riley shook his head and seemed to deflate.

"No," he breathed. "I'm fine. I'm okay." After a few moments he finally seemed to get himself under control and let out a shuddering sigh. Riley turned his now dulled blue eyes to him. It was the despair that came so often after a nightmare, the feeling that he couldn't break free and that it would haunt him forever.  
"Ben I hate this," he whispered. "I can't do this. I don't know how much longer..."

Ben felt scared for his friend. "Is it alright if I sit down next to you?"  
"Yeah. Sorry about…just now."   
Ben seated himself on the edge of the bed next Riley.

"It'll be okay, Riley," was all he could say at the moment.

"I honestly don't know if I can deal with this anymore."  
Ben's heart rate went up a few notches. "Do you feel like it's getting worse?"  
Riley blinked and stared at nothing in particular.  
"I don't know. I feel like I just want it to go away."

Ben couldn't say anything for a few moments because his throat felt tight and he blinked back the sudden irritation in the corner of his eyes.

"I do too."  
"What if it takes awhile?"

"I'm not leaving. Abigail's not leaving. You're not alone Riley. Please try and remember that. You're not alone. And I don't care if I'm a broken record. If this is how many times you need to be reminded, so be it."

Riley was still staring straight ahead and his expression became almost agonized. It looked like he was going to completely break down. But after a moment it passed and the clouded eyes returned. Ben realized Riley didn't have a natural way of shedding his pent up emotions. And it couldn't have been healthy. Not with pain like that to carry around.

"You can cry if you want," Ben prompted softly. "You know you don't need to pretend with me."  
Riley just shook his head and sighed. Ben grasped the fact that shoving emotion inside was just natural to Riley. He had grown up doing it and had become frighteningly good at it. Ben was no expert but he knew emotions couldn't be bottled up forever they had to go somewhere. It was beginning to worry Ben, he was expecting any day now for Riley to have a complete breakdown. But he never did and Ben wondered how much longer his friend could hold everything inside. Riley seemed to be suffering ramifications for keeping everything inside now. His memories had forced their way to the surface and now Riley had to finally confront them after so many years of pretending everything wasn't screwed up. And he couldn't deal with it.

There was a silence that lasted for a few minutes sometimes broken by Riley's sighs. He felt his whole body settling down, his shaking becoming less and less. Riley was comforted by the fact Ben was there. He acted like a kind of deterrent to his fear, helped him calm down.

"Would it be okay if we go into the living room?" Riley asked suddenly. Ben nodded, albeit a little confused. "Sure, you wanna turn on a movie or something…?"  
"Uh, no, thanks. I just…I find it easier to sleep somewhere…else after having a nightmare."  
Ben didn't question this need and they both made their way into the living room where Riley lay himself down on the couch.  
"Do you need something?"  
"Just sleep."  
"Okay."  
Ben sat on a chair and watched as his friend made himselfcomfortable. Riley curled up, eyes tightly closed. He was so tense, even about to fall asleep. It struck Ben hard how young he suddenly looked, as if he had regressed back into a child. And he looked cold even though it was fairly warm in the room. Ben went back into Riley's bedroom, took a blanket and walked back over to his now semi-conscious friend. Gently, he covered Riley with the blanket.

Riley stirred slightly and let out a little sigh. "Thanks."

Ben smiled and tucked in the edges, pulling the sheet up to Riley's chin.

Then he sat back down on the chair, lost in his own thoughts for a few minutes. A sudden powerful thought gripped him; it caused his whole body to stiffen. As he looked at his friend he decided right then and there that if anybody else caused this young man anymore pain…they were going to die. That surge of protectiveness was the strangest emotion he had ever felt. He wondered if this is what it felt like to be the father of a hurting child.  
"You can go if you want," came the muffled sound of Riley's voice. Ben was startled for a second. His friend must have been more awake then he originally assumed.

"You don't have to wait for me to sleep. I can lay here for hours sometimes."

Insomnia. Ben sighed and looked at the young man who trying to get the sleep that his body so desperately needed.

"Do you want sleeping pills?"  
"No," Riley said into the pillow. His voice sounded almost like childlike. "No drugs Ben."

Ben knew it wasn't the time to probe Riley for questions. His friend just really needed sleep.

Ben cast his mind around for something that might help. Then he remembered something from a long time ago. Years ago. Ben would sometimes have bad dreams of his own. And his father would tell him stories. It was passed down in the Gates family; Patrick received it from his own father. It would chase away Ben's nighttime fears, Patrick would talk steadily in a soothing voice until Ben had fallen back asleep.

He wasn't sure if it would work for Riley. The only stories he knew were the ones his father and grandfather told him and they revolved around history. _Maybe he'll be bored to sleep_, Ben thought.

-

"Riley, I'm going to tell you a story."

"Is it about treasure?"  
"It could be. Do you want it to be?"  
"Not really. I'm kind of treasured out."

"Okay. What do you want it to be about?"  
"Something…" Riley mumbled. "Tell me anything…as long as it ends okay."

"Okay," Ben said softly he leaned forward a little bit. He decided to humor him and share something from his past. Maybe making him smile would take Riley's mind off his sleep deprivation for a little while. "Did you know I once almost got mutilated by a gorilla?"

"Huh, no kidding? How old were you?"  
"Uh, about fourteen."  
"Hah…I think I'm going to like this story."

"It was actually a date gone horribly wrong. Her name was Aubrey."  
"What," Riley asked in puzzlement, "The gorilla?"   
"_No_, my girlfriend."  
"Ben, you're making this confusing," whined Riley.

" Okay, okay. I took my girlfriend Aubrey to a zoo. I would have done basically anything to impress this girl."  
"I'm telling Abi," mumbled Riley.  
"Do that and your laptop will be mysteriously missing the next day. So anyways, there we were, having a great time in front of the gorilla habitat. I give her this bracelet and she loves it. She's crazy for it."  
"Uh-oh. She dropped into the gorilla cage right?" Riley suddenly giggled. "Tell me that's what happened."  
"Riley that is exactly what happened. As I said before I would have done anything to impress her. So being the chivalric gentleman I was, I jumped in after it to retrieve it for her of course."  
"Of course," Riley said, his eyes glowing.   
"And so I'm in there and Aubrey is screaming at me and people are starting to gather around to look at the idiot who just jumped in with the gorillas. I get the bracelet and hear this sound behind me, turn around and I see this _gigantic _gorilla. It must have been the alpha male or something."  
"Ah, I could have taken it on." Riley yawned.  
"Riley, they weigh about three hundred and eighty five pound and are six feet in height. Believe me, I looked it up."

"Still…"

"So I did what any other impulsive reckless teenager would do in my current situation."  
"Fought it like a man?" Riley smirked.

"No, screamed like a girl. And I tried to get back out of the habitat. Luckily for me the gorilla keepers or whatever came in with tranquilizers and knocked the thing out. By that time I was bawling and pretty much everyone in the zoo was looking and laughing at me. They got me out and I gave Aubrey back her bracelet but she broke up with me right there in front of everybody and the gorillas. And my dad grounded me for a month."  
"Wow…that was a _great _story." Riley said a little sarcastically but Ben could see a pleased smile partially hidden by the pillow. "But uh, what happened to the 'everything turns out alright' part?"  
"Well, the gorilla didn't shred me to pieces. I'm alive, am I not?" Ben said with a smile.

Riley blinked tiredly at Ben, his eyelids drooping. "Am you are…" he muttered. "I mean…yes you are."  
Ben grinned and kept a watchful on Riley as he sunk further into his pillow.

"Ben, can you…keep talking? It helps."

"Sure," Ben said getting out of his chair. He knelt down next to Riley just as his father always did with him. And he continued to talk, this time about battles during the Civil War and about a man named Lincoln. Riley relaxed a little more with each passing minute. Finally his breathing evened out. He was asleep, a peaceful look on his face. Ben sighed, compassion coursing through him for his best friend. He lightly ran a hand over Riley's brown hair.

"Sleep tight kid."  
-

About a week later not much had changed. Riley seemed to be improving a little bit, he was eating more and seemed more lively. But he was still obsessively engrossed in the case about his father. And Ben and Abigail could tell it was tearing at him that he couldn't get more information.

They poked their heads into his room on a Friday night and saw him in his usual spot at the computer. He looked up as they came into the room.

"Ben, Abigail," he greeted blurrily. Abigail spotted a microwave dinner on his desk.  
"Hey, you're eating," she commented in delight. Riley gave her a lopsided grin. "Almost finished the whole thing," he said proudly. Ben smiled and offered his congratulations as well.

Abigail suddenly pulled Ben over to the side, out of the room.

"Hang on, I need to consult something with my husband," she said to the younger man,

"Consult away," Riley said irked at the fact that Abigail couldn't say whatever she was saying in front of him.

"How long has he been researching like this?" she muttered to Ben. "I mean, it's been what. A month?"  
"Good point. He's been doing nothing expect his work and search for his father. That can't be healthy."

Simultaneously the both slowly peered around the corner into their friend's room. Riley was looking at them suspiciously with a raised eyebrow. Both their heads withdrew out of his line of sight again.

"Okay, here's the plan," Abigail said in a low voice. "We kidnap him and bring him somewhere. You know, to give him a little break."  
"I don't know Abi. He won't come willingly."  
She rolled her eyes. "Which is why we _kidnap _him. Pay attention Ben."

Riley was now glaring at the two of them as they came back into the room.

"Okay, what was that all abo-HEY!" Both the Gates had fastened their arms around his and lifted him out of his seat and started to drag him toward the door.

"What are you doing?! Let me go!"

"We're kidnapping you," Abigail said cheerfully.

"Huh? Why?"

"You need to get out of the house." Ben said flatly.  
"I _have _been out of the house-"  
"Only to go to work and to visit your foster parents. Seriously Riley, not my idea of taking a break."

"I don't need a break."  
Ben barley held in a frustrated sigh. His friend looked like he was running himself into the ground. It had been nearly a month and Ben hadn't seen him do one thing for himself. And it was obviously taking its toll.

"Just pretend I'm your doctor for a minute. Your diagnosis is too much stress. Prescription: Some time away."  
Riley was opening his mouth but only half words were coming out.

"But…I have…stuff…to do."  
"Not right now you don't, " Abigail said who seemed to be thoroughly enjoying herself. "Come on."  
-

The three friends walked up and down the blocks, part various stores. There were so many different people out that night. Rowdy teenagers, couples holding hands, families. Riley watched them with some interest.

"So," Abigail began. "What do you want to do first?"  
"Um I thought this was your deal. Don't you have a game plan?"

"Well, this is for you. So it's whatever you want to do."  
Riley crossed his arms and looked slowly up and down the street.

"Okay, let me think. What could a rich treasure hunter/history buff, mean Declaration lady and a computer technician do for fun around here? And if either of you say 'the museum' I will hurt you."

Ben raised his eyebrows and tapped his finger on his chin.

"We could go to the movies?" he said doubtfully.

Riley shook his head. "Nah, nothing good out." Riley suddenly brightened. He seemed to be getting into this now. "Hey, we can go to the arcade!" He hadn't been to the arcade since he was high school.   
"The arcade."  
"Yeah! Come on Ben. You said I could pick wherever I want…unless you're afraid I'll beat your butt in everything we play!"

"I am not!" Ben said defensively.

"Oh come on Ben," Abigail laughed. " He almost made you cry that one time you were playing him at _Super Mario Kart_…"

"Come on Ben!" Riley chimed in. "Peer pressure. Or should I tell Abigail about a certain incident involving a gorilla?"

"Okay, okay. Arcade it is."

"Gorilla? Ben, what happened with a gorilla?"  
"He treasure-hunted it to death," Riley joked.

-

The arcade was loud and noisy, music and sounds from various games overlapping each other. Ben had never liked video games. He was much more of a book person. His wife seemed pretty happy about Riley's choice though.

There were mostly teenage males in the arcade. It made Ben feel older then he should have but Abigail seemed quite content being in the minority. Riley fit right in mostly because he looked younger then his twenty-nine years of age. He stopped in front of one arcade game, his eyes widening.  
"Dude, Ben come and check this out. Don't tell me you've never played _Galaga._"

"Can't say that I have."  
"Ben, it's definitely a classic. Up there with _Pac-man._"  
For the next half an hour Ben had a crash course in an old fashioned game that involved a space ship shooting at various patterns of bugs that swarmed down from the top of the screen. It was actually pretty fun and Ben caught on quickly.

"Hey, where's Abi?" Ben asked suddenly. They looked around and found her standing next to a pimply-faced teenager at a shooting game. The teenager looked sullen and they quickly realized it was because Abigail was beating him by a landslide.

"Abigail, we should get going. Leave the poor kid to pick up his shattered ego," Ben prodded.  
"Noo, I've almost beaten this level!"   
Riley snorted and put a hand over his mouth to keep from laughing. Finally they managed to get Abigail away from the game and Ben gave the visibly peeved boy a sympathetic pat on his shoulder.

"Twenty bucks lady!" he called after her as they left. "I spent twenty bucks trying to beat this game and you did it with a dollar!?"

-

They decided to get something to eat but Riley petitioned against going into restaurant or diner, saying too many people were there and he wouldn't feel comfortable sitting there and feeling like everyone was watching him eat. So they ended up getting food off a street vendor.

It was a summer's night; streetlights illuminated the paths where crowds of people undulated in and out of various stores. He stopped to examine some items in an electronics store window.

Someone tapped him on the shoulder, and he turned to see an elderly man looking down at him. Riley looked back up at the stranger and frowned.

"Do you want something?" he asked. The man handed him an envelope.

"Your father wants you to have this."

Riley stared at the envelope in shock. Then he looked back up. "How-"  
The man was already half-way down the street, the crowd nearly obscuring him from view.  
"_Hey_!" Riley shouted. He took off after the man.

Ben and Abigail meanwhile were looking around for Riley.

"Ben, there he is!" Abigail yelled, pointing to him running madly in the opposite direction.

"Oh-shoot." Ben muttered. "Come on!" They both turned on their heels and pushed their way through the crowd after him.

Riley looked frantically around, wondering if he had lost that man. Then he saw him running across this street, trying to loose Riley in the traffic.

"Oh no you don't" Riley growled and impulsively darted out after him.

Ben and Abigail reached the edge of the sidewalk and saw their friend run in front of oncoming cars. Riley stopped cold in his tracks at the sound of a blaring horn, his whole body freezing over like a deer in the headlights.

"Ah hell, _RILEY_!" Ben hollered. He made a move to run but was slowed down by the crowd jostling him. Abigail reacted, shoving herself through clusters of people and ran out in the middle of the street towards Riley. She grabbed him by the shoulders, and threw him out of harms way onto the sidewalk. She lost her own balance and fell hard next to him just as a car barreled past, its horn blaring.  
Ben ran up to them nearly beside himself with worry.

"You're okay? You're both okay?"  
"Yeah," Abigail panted feeling a slight sense of déjà vu, only in reverse.

"Oh thank God," he muttered, catching his breath. "Thank God.

"Riley," Abigail began, about to ask what in the world just happened, and stopped. Her friend was clutching an envelope, white knuckled in his hand. He looked completely overwhelmed. Ben looked around at the crowd of people that had gathered around them. "What are you standing here for? Show's over! Go!" he shouted at them Muttering, they left some more slowly then others.

He turned his attention back to Riley and clutched his arm.

"Let's get him to sit down," Ben breathed and they both helped Riley up and guided him to a nearby bench. They sat on either side of him, put their arms around him and watched him intently.

Riley swallowed and closed his eyes, counting down in his head to get his breathing and panic under control. He wasn't going to get sick again. He wasn't. Feeling Ben and Abigail's arms around his shoulders helped calm him down.

Finally he opened his eyes. He let out one deep breath and gave them a shaky nod.

"Thanks." He turned to Abigail and grinned a little. "I seem to recall a certain incident…involving a Declaration and a truck."  
Abigail laughed and gave him a side hug. "I was thinking the same thing."

Ben gave Abigail a questioning look, the conversation going over his head. Abigail waved her hand and gave him a 'I'll tell you later' look.

"Do you want to tell us what that was all about Riley?"" Ben asked. "You just suddenly ran off like that. What's going on?"  
"Well…this man stopped me. And he gave me this envelope. He said…" he gulped. "He said my father wanted me to have it."

"Deus ex machina," Ben muttered.  
"Then he was gone before I had the chance to ask him anything. I chased him."  
"And ran into the middle of the street," Abigail said fondly.

"Yes," Riley rolled his eyes. He looked at the envelope. Then he looked between Ben and Abigail. "I need…I need to open this."  
"Do what you feel you need to Riley. We're right here." Ben said quietly.

"Oh, and before I open it, I just want to let you both know I had a good time tonight. Well, besides the whole almost getting run over part. Thanks so much for forcing me to come out here. I just wanted to say that…before I see whatever's in here."

"Anytime, Riley."

Riley looked between them, took a deep breath and ripped open the seal. He took out a folded piece of paper.

"It's a letter," he said quietly, his voice almost lost in the noise of the streets. Clearing his throat he read:  
_Riley, I know I'm the last person you would ever want to hear from and I don't blame you. But something extremely urgent has come up that I need your help with. Please meet me at the Canal Homeless Shelter as soon as you get this. Someone's life is in danger. It's not mine because I know if it was you wouldn't care. Just meet me and I will explain everything. I would write more, but I don't want the wrong person to read this. Please take my words into consideration. _

Riley put a fist to his mouth as he reread the brief letter.

"Someone's life?" he whispered.

"Do you think he's telling the truth?" Abigail asked nervously.

"I don't know Abi. But if he is telling the truth then the stakes are too high to just ignore him."  
-


	7. The Meeting

A/N: Sorry about that monster of a chapter last time. This one is much shorter  Thank you **SMARTALIENQT, daisyduke80, Raina-Bess, so original, The Love of a Lie and Majestik Moose** for actually reading and taking the time to review the chapter. Thanks guys!   
Sorry about the embarrassingly slow update. I'll talk about that after the chappie.

-

Ben shifted in his seat as he looked as he glanced at Riley who was in the back seat. It was bizarre, he felt more worried then his friend looked. Abigail was sitting on the passengers, with a sheet of directions in her hand. Ben had actually written them himself. He didn't like printing them out from the Internet. He trusted his own research more then copying and pasting. Riley thought it was ridiculous.  
"Ben, just get a GPS system. I don't think money should be an issue here," his friend said helpfully.

"I told you, I like finding the location on my own. Using a GPS feels like cheating."  
"It's not a treasure hunt Ben. Besides if it _was _a treasure hunt, wouldn't it be great if there was a GPS leading right up to the treasure?"  
Ben sighed eyes fixed on the road while Abigail snickered next to him.

"Hush for minute. I'm concentrating."  
"See, if you had a GPS, you wouldn't _need_…"  
"Hush!"  
"Yes sir," Riley smirked.

"Thank you." Ben muttered.  
They were on their way to the Canal Men's Homeless Shelter. Riley had been speaking lightly the day before they left, acting like he absolutely had everything under control. But they all knew he was terrified. Even Riley knew he wasn't fooling anyone.

The homeless shelter was open for dinnertime. Riley wondered how hard it would be to look for his father there. He hoped it wouldn't be too crowded.

Eventually Ben pulled up on the street and began circling for a parking spot.   
"There Ben. There, there, there," Abigail pointed to an open spot that was coming up. Ben went right on past it.

"What are you doing? That was a parking place!" Abigail quipped.

"The car won't fit in there."  
"Well, it's the only spot on the block."  
"It's too small."

"You could have at least _tried_."  
Riley was snickering in the background. "You guys…"  
"Mommy and daddy are talking right now," Abigail said, scowling at Ben.  
"Guys there's a spot right there," Riley tried again.

-

They got out of the car and Riley looked around as Ben fed the meter. It was getting darker out. The sun was already setting, causing orange light to reflect off of the surrounding buildings. He shivered lightly even though it was relatively still warm outside. Abigail came up to him and rubbed his shoulder.

"Nervous?"  
Riley nodded. "Yeah, But for some reason I'm sort of relieved we're here. Its weird, I'm crazy nervous…but I want to get this over with, you know?"

"Well, that's understandable," Ben said coming up to them. "The shelter is about three blocks from here."  
They fell into step with each other and Riley looked at both of them.

"Guys…you don't need to do this…you didn't need to come along…" he muttered.  
"Riley, do you seriously think we're going to let you do this alone, after everything?" Ben asked in annoyance.

Riley grinned. "Not really, no."  
"That's what I thought."   
Abigail smiled and put a hand on his shoulder. "Besides, who would annoy you with everything?"  
"Annoying is my job."  
"Well now it's mine too."  
"You just nag. You nagger. That's what you do."  
"And you're short."

Riley gasped. "Ben! She called me short! That's inexcusable!"  
"Well you _are_," Abigail persisted annoyingly. "I'm taller then you."  
"That's a boldfaced lie! I clearly have the advantage of height by a good two inches!"

Ben leaned his elbows on their shoulders. "I'm taller then both of you," he grinned.

They both glared at him and stopped squabbling.  
-  
Riley had been trying not to think about what he was about to do. They had been talking the way there but now as they walked closer to their destination he grew quiet. It felt like his stomach was squirming around inside of him. He hadn't seen his dad in years. And so many questions were rushing through his mind so fast that they stumbled over each other.

Riley almost stopped a few times wanting to just turn around and run. But he realized he had been running for most of life. From everything. His past, memories, things he wanted to forget and not face. They had come back to ravage his life and leave him helpless again. But he wasn't alone this time. He had friends who cared about him and wanted him to get through this. It was the only thing keeping his head above the water.

So he figured he was as close to ready as he could be. He probably would never be fully ready.

"Hey, we're here." Abigail said suddenly. They looked up at the brick building. It had a simple enough exterior with the name embossed over the doorframe.

Ben looked at Abigail anxiously. "Abi, I would feel better if you waited."  
Abigail raised a disbelieving eyebrow at him. "Stay here? No way, I'm coming with you."  
Ben still looked unhappy but he knew he couldn't convince his wife otherwise. Riley was standing there a little awkwardly.

"Okay. Well, shall we go in?"  
They entered and it was immediately apparent how crowded it was. Riley let out a groan in his head. This was what he was afraid of. His father could be anywhere in here.

"Stay close, both of you." Ben said as they maneuvered their way through the men. Most of the people there ignored them entirely. Some glanced briefly at them and continued eating or playing cards or whatever they were doing.

A few of them were staring at them, specifically Abigail. Riley drew himself to her other side so he and Ben were flanking her.

"Not you to," Abigail said with a smirk.

"Not me what?" Riley asked feigning ignorance.

Abigail rolled her eyes but didn't say anything.

"Maybe we should ask the volunteers," Riley suggested. There were a few of them serving food to the men in line. "They might know some of the people here."

"We might need to split up to cover more ground," Abigail said. Ben and Riley looked at her uncomfortably.  
"Um, why don't you stay with one of us Abi," Riley muttered. Abigail stamped her foot in frustration.

"Seriously, you two are impossible. I can handle myself thank you very much. Nothing will happen."  
Before Ben could say anything she walked into the crowd.

"She's so STUBBORN!" he groaned in frustration. Riley smirked.

"That's why you're so great for each other."

"Okay, I'm going to go see if I can catch up to her. Although she's probably trying to loose me in the crowd."

They split up and Riley began to question various people around the kitchen and dining area. Riley had a photograph of his father and he asked if they had seen him, if he looked familiar. No one recognized the picture although a few of them recognized him which annoyed Riley because he wanted to keep a low profile. His heart began to sink. Was this all some sort of set up? Did his father thin this was a sick game? At this rate it would take forever to find his him. Riley sighed and leaned against the wall watching the men eat in the cafeteria. _Wow…_he suddenly thought. _All these people? They don't have proper homes. I never really gave it much thought. That really sucks. _

-  
Abigail was having about the same luck as Riley. She wanted to find this man; it would mean everything to her friend. Although she knew how much Riley was conflicted over meeting him. After all, his own father had been abusive. It made her blood boil to just think about it. Who would want to hurt someone like Riley? She couldn't bare the thought of it.

She sighed and was about to regroup when she heard a sharp voice behind her.

"Stop looking at her like that."

Abigail turned around in confusion to see who was talking. Her confusion quickly turned into anger. A man stood leering at her. His eyes were red and she guessed he was drugged out or something.

"I said stop it," her defender growled and roughly shoved the guys arm. A few other men were hovering behind him looking ready to pound the guy if they had to. The offender muttered something and wandered off in a daze.  
"You okay lady," a man asked gruffly.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Thank you," she said. They began to disperse and she sighed glad Ben hadn't been there for that incident. He probably would have freaked out beaten the crap out of the man. Then she looked up saw Ben moving through the crowd with Riley a little bit behind him.

Ben looked frightened. "Abi, are you okay?" he asked pulling her into a hug. Riley had his lips pressed together in worry.

"Guys, I'm quite alright. Really," she said in exasperation. Ben sighed in relief and kissed her on the head. Riley smiled when she discreetly turned to him and rolled her eyes at Ben's protectiveness.

Riley's eyes suddenly widened at something behind Abigail.  
"You! You're the guy from the other day, the one who gave me the letter!" he cried.

They turned and Abigail realized he was talking to the man who had defended her earlier. He was elderly, and held himself with a kind of poise despite his ragged clothing.

He raised his eyebrows. "Riley Poole…you're here for your father?"   
"Yes, yes, do you know my father? How did you know to give me the letter? Do you know what he meant? " Riley asked apprehensively in one breath.

The man held up a hand. "Slow down," he said in a smooth voice. Riley stopped his barrage of questions.  
"But I need to find my father now." Riley said flatly. "I don't have that much time."  
The elderly man paused and looked at him regretfully. "I'm afraid you missed him."  
Riley felt his stomach fall flat. "What?"  
"He was taken to the hospital about a week ago for liver failure."  
He felt Ben's hand go to his shoulder.

"Is he dead?" Riley asked in an expressionless voice.

"No, but I suggest you go soon if you want to see him. You can talk to the shelter director to find out which hospital he was taken to."   
Riley nodded and looked at the man carefully. "Who are you?"  
"I'm Brad Conely. Yes, I do know your father although we are more acquaintances then friends."  
"You gave me the letter…"  
"I'm paid to track people down for others. It's what I do. I owed Jonathan a favor so I took to finding you myself."

"So you were stalking me?" Riley asked incredulously.

"Well, if you want to put it that blatantly."

"Not shady at allll…." Riley muttered. Ben spoke up in a low voice, "So do you know what he meant in the letter? There were some pretty serious claims."  
"I'm just the messenger. I don't look at other people's mail. Sorry I can't help more."

"That's okay." Riley sighed. It looked like they had to travel to a different place again. "I'm going to go talk to the director to see if he knows the hospital. "Nice meeting you Mr. Conely."  
Brad nodded to the trio as the started to move off. He seemed conflicted for his moment then opened his mouth to speak.

"My old man hit me too."  
Riley turned quickly back to Brad. Ben had turned around also with a fierce expression on his face and Abigail draped her hands protectively around Riley's shoulders.

"It really messes you up." Brad said quietly, locking eyes with Riley.   
"We're going now," Ben growled, beginning to lead Riley away while glaring daggers at Brad.  
"Wait. Guys, its okay." He gently shrugged them off. "I want to talk to him for a minute."

Abigail reluctantly let him go and Ben crossed his arms. "We'll be right over here," he said pointedly while looking suspiciously at Brad. Riley nodded and watched his friends retreat a few meters away.

"They've been with you a while," said Brad looking after them. Riley nodded.

"They're helping me through everything."  
"That's good," Brad said softly. "I wish I had someone like that in my life when I was going through something similar."  
There was a pause and Brad sighed. "Although you've been through more then I have." He was referring to the accident.

"My dad was never there." Riley suddenly said flatly. He didn't know why he said it. He just did. " After all that had happened he was never there for me. He made it worse."

"Listen. Before you go I just want to tell you one thing. I was so bitter at my own dad for all of my life. I hated him."  
"You're allowed to hate him," Riley growled under his breath.  
"Just listen. I was so bitter to a point that I became a bitter person myself. I never let it go Riley. I harbored the hate inside myself because I thought I was getting him back. In reality, I was only hurting myself."  
"So what are you saying? Are you saying I should pretend he never did any of those things to me?" Riley asked in disbelief.  
"No, that's not what I'm saying. I'm saying you need to work on letting it go. Which you are, even if you don't realize it. The fact you are going to talk to him is more then I did."  
"Yeah. Well, we'll see how it goes."

"Your dad does speak quite highly of you."

Riley closed his eyes. "Please, don't defend him. This is hard enough"

"I'm not. It's just something I think you should know. He talks about you often."  
"I'm going to go now."  
"People can change, Riley."  
Riley gave him a thin humorless smile. "Kind of late for that. Thank you again, Mr. Conely."

-  
Ben and Abigail watched as the two men shook hands, Brad pointing something out in the crowd. Riley headed in the direction and Ben realized he was going to talk to the shelter director to figure out what hospital his father was in.

"Well," he sighed quietly. "This is proving to me more complicated then originally thought."  
"It feels like a wild goose chase." Abigail added. "Only…the goose was trying to find the person chasing it before the person began chasing it themselves."  
Ben squinted at her. "I kind of lost you five words in."  
"You know what I mean."  
"Yeah." He frowned and his eyes held a sudden faraway look.  
"Ben, what's going on in that head of yours," Abigail asked locking arms with him.

"It's just…" he sighed. "It seems like forever ago since the party…I don't know. Maybe I could have done more or something."   
"Sweetie, look at where we are. You've been with Riley every step of the way. How long has it been now? A month and a half?"  
"Abi,… I couldn't protect him." Ben suddenly said quietly.

"Oh Ben," she sighed slipping her hand into his.

"I feel…like I'm just watching him slip away from us. He's not carefree anymore…I mean…sometimes it scares me how different he looks. I told him he would be the same guy when this was all over. But I'm not sure anymore."

Ben sighed and looked at the ground. His best friend had gone through hell and back and he didn't even know until about a month ago.

"Hey," Abigail said softly. She cupped his chin in her hand and he looked sadly at her.  
"He'll always be Riley. We're just seeing a different side of him now. The best we could do is just keep being there and weather it out with him."  
He gave her a small smile and she brushed her hand over his cheek.

"Honey, you don't have to beat yourself up over this."

"I know," he muttered, his eyes returning to his friend. Riley was now talking to a man who Ben assumed was the director. As he watched Riley took something out of his back pocket. Ben realized it was a checkbook. He wrote out a check and handed it to the man who looked touched. He said something to Riley who went to shake his hand but instead got a hug. Ben and Abigail smirked at each other.

Riley walked back toward them looking quite pleased.

"He said that my father was moved to the St. John's hospital about fifteen minutes away from here," was all Riley said. Hopefully this would be the last stop.  
-

They pulled into the hospital parking lot. Ben turned off the car and the only sound for a few moments was the engine cooling down. Ben looked into the rearview mirror. His friend looked so conflicted yet determined. It was ultimately up to Riley. Ben and Abigail would support him no matter what he decided. Finally Riley let out a sigh.

"Let's go," he said.

They got out of the car, slammed the door and started toward the hospital. Riley walked slowly and wrapped his arms around himself.

He felt Abigail uncurl one of his arms and latch onto it.

"How are you doing," she asked  
"I'm kind of freaking out," he muttered.

Ben squeezed his shoulder. "Scared is fine Riley. You know that right?"  
"Yeah. But I'd rather not be. My stomach feels like there's something living in it."

As he looked at the hospital his stomach felt worse and he had to stop.

"Why am I here?" Riley asked suddenly looking panicked." Why did I decide to meet him? This is crazy."

"The letter I think. Someone may be in danger. But even before that you wanted to find him for yourself." Ben said quietly.  
Riley took a breath and nodded even though he looked slightly paler.

"You can do this buddy," Ben assured.

"You'll be fine," Abigail said and gave his arm a squeeze.  
Riley smiled. He opened his mouth, wanted to tell them how much he appreciated them being there, wanted to thank them for everything. But he couldn't voice what he wanted to say.

- 

The hospital was clean and stark and just how Riley remembered it. He swallowed a little bit and tried not to recall that horrible month's stay when he was younger. That was the last thing he needed. He hated these places. When he was younger he wondered why adults would try and make pretended that coming here was not a big deal when it was a scary place for them too.

The receptionist looked tired and was drinking some coffee when Riley approached her.

"Excuse me?"  
"Yes, can I help you hon?" she asked looking up at him.   
"Can you tell me which room Jonathan Poole is in?"

"Certainly. What is your relation to him?"  
"I'm his son," Riley muttered,  
She nodded and began to tap on the keyboard. Riley swallowed hard. He couldn't believe he was actually doing this. Ben was looking at him carefully, hovering over his shoulder.

"Okay, he is in room 403. You just take the elevator up and make a right."

They walked over to the elevator and Riley suddenly felt that getting into this one was worse then the one under Trinity Church.

-

"This is the room," Abigail said quietly. Riley turned to his friends who were looking at him apprehensively.  
"I think I need to do this alone."  
They nodded in understanding. "But if you need _anything_," Ben said his eyes narrowing, "We're right out here. Okay?"  
"Okay. Thanks guys," he muttered. He took a deep breath and shrugged. "Here goes nothing."  
He turned the doorknob and walked into the room.

And there was his father. Jonathan Poole. He was lying on the hospital bed fast asleep. He was pale, breathing harshly, an IV attached to his arm.

Riley had to stop and take a few deep breaths before walking over to the beside. He sat there for what seemed like an eternity.

Every thought kind of jumbled through his head and his throat went dry. The ailing man in front of him was his own father. _I can't believe I was so afraid of you, _he thought bitterly. _I can't believe you made my life a living hell. I should just tell you everything I want to say now. I shouldn't give you any benefit of the doubt that you changed. And even if you did it wouldn't matter. _He almost felt like crying at that point but instinctively stomped down the tears.

"Dad," he said.

Jonathan slowly opened his eyes and looked confused for a moment. Then he turned to Riley and they widened in shock.

"Riley! You came?"  
"Yes."

There was moment of silence and they both looked at each other. After so many years it was surreal. Neither of them really knew what to say or do.

Finally Riley spoke. "Why did you want to see me," he asked in a low voice.   
"Many reasons…" his father muttered, still staring at him in almost disbelieving way. He suddenly chuckled weakly. "I saw you on the news like everyone else but…here you are, in real life. You changed so much since…"  
"Since you last beat the crap out of me?" Riley asked numbly. Jonathan fell silent and Riley wanted to pretend that a look of remorse didn't come over his father's face.

"Riley…" he reached out a hand to take Riley's arm.

Riley jerked back. "Don't touch me!" he snapped. There was yet another silence. So much unspoken pain was hanging in the air.

"Riley," his father began slowly. "I know there is nothing I can ever say or do to get you to forgive me…and I'm not expecting you to forgive me. I just want you to know that I'm sorry."

Riley didn't know how to respond.

"Sorry?" he said hoarsely. "_Sorry?_ Do you know what happened when you waltzed back into my life?"  
"No Riley. Please enlighten me."  
Riley was so angry his voice shook with the effort to restrain himself. "Everything was going great. Amazing even. I felt for the first time that my life was looking up. Then you had to come, and everything came crashing down. Why did you even come to that gala?!"  
"Riley, that's why you're here. I need your help, desperately. The only place I knew where you'd be was at that party. Before that you made yourself virtually untraceable. I didn't have the technology to find you. But then I saw you on the news…and this could have been the only chance I had to get in contact with you."

"So you slipped by security…" Riley muttered. "To try and talk to me."  
"Yes! And you…well, we both know how it went. So that's why I had to enlist Brad Conely to give you a letter! Otherwise you never would have come to see me."  
"Believe or not, I was looking for you before I got the letter. And I was only doing it because if I didn't I would drive myself insane wondering what you meant."  
"Well…" Jonathan cleared his throat. "I need to tell you…did you read the letter?"  
"Yes," Riley mumbled. "It said someone's life was in danger dad. And you better not say your own."  
"I said it wasn't mine in the letter Riley."  
"Whose life," Riley said in resignation. "Whose life is in danger?"

"Your brother's."  
Riley felt his breath catch in his throat. He slowly moved his hand to the armrest to support himself because he felt very weak suddenly.

"I have a brother?" he asked hoarsely.

"Half-brother technically," his father said meeting his gaze. Riley ran a hand over his face briefly.  
"How…old…" he cleared his throat. "How old is he?"  
"Six years old," his father whispered. "His name is Mikey."  
"W-what happened?" Riley asked looking visibly shaken. "You didn't…I swear if you treated him the way you did me…"  
"No!" Jonathan shouted looked aghast. "No, I love Mikey, and I love you too!"  
"DON'T!" Riley suddenly cried the pain erupting in his chest. "_Please _don't SAY that! After all you did!"

"Riley, just listen-"  
"No, YOU LISTEN!" Riley yelled and jumped on his feet. He was trembling uncontrollably. "You don't seem to remember! Maybe you were too _drunk _or something?! I don't know! But I remember! I remember every beating you gave to me and Mom, before she died! And just because you claim to have turned things around for yourself doesn't just erase the fact of everything you've done!"  
"I KNOW!!" his father screamed back at him. "DO YOU THINK THAT THERE IS A DAY THAT GOES BY WITHOUT ME HATING MYSELF FOR WHAT I'VE DONE!?"

They both fell into silence, breathing heavily. Riley was clutching the back of the chair for support. The door opened, distracting them both.

"Is everything okay in here Riley?"

Riley turned to see Ben standing partially in the room looking slightly unnerved yet ready to jump into the room if he had too. Riley realized how their raised voices must have sounded to the people in the hallway. Riley shook his head. "I'm fine Ben," he muttered. "Sorry. I'll be out soon." Ben nodded, casting him an intense look before silently closing the door. Riley sighed and sank back into his chair. Another few moments of silence.

"Who was that?" Jonathan asked gruffly.

"Ben Gates. You probably saw him on the news also."  
"Oh. So you and him are more then just business associates?"  
"I'd like to think so. He's my best friend." Riley sighed and cleared his throat. "Look…I think we got sidetracked…I mean, this is about helping Mikey." His father nodded at him severely. Riley grimaced a little and asked, "Tell me…what happened dad. And I'll see what I can do to help."  
Jonathan sighed a closed his eyes. "Mikey was born when I was already low on my resources and luck. The mother didn't want to keep him so she gave him to me. It was hard raising him…but we managed to scrape by. Until recently…" Jonathan swallowed. "A while ago I had some connections to a drug ring. I put that all behind me…but those kinds of people haunt you…they followed me…I had debts I needed to repay…and I couldn't pay them."  
Riley had shifted in his seat and felt a dawning horror in his gut as he began to see where the story was going.

"So they took they only thing I had left! They took my son!" Jonathan looked at Riley with tears in his eyes. "They took my little boy away from me! I had nothing before but I had him…now I have absolutely nothing."

Riley couldn't believe what he was hearing on so many different levels. "Why didn't you go to the police?" he asked, feeling slightly dizzy.

"They threatened to kill him! I couldn't do that…I couldn't tell anyone because word might have slipped through…I don't have the money Riley…"  
"Okay..." Riley gripped the armrest of the chair. The kid was only six years old. He seriously felt like freaking out. "Okay, I'm going get him back. But I'll need more information."  
"Of course…" Jonathan reached over to the other side of the bed and picked up a picture off the stand. "I carry it with me all the time."  
Riley took it and studied the picture and he felt his expression soften slightly. It was of Mikey, he was sure of it. He had dark brown hair just like him, but his eyes were a deep brown color. He reminded Riley of his little sisters, what he remembered of him.

"This is what he looks like…"  
"Ben has connections to the FBI. We could contact them to help."  
Jonathan nodded and looked imploringly at him. "You'll tell me right? Bring him when you find him…or if you can't just let me know he's safe…"  
Riley bit his lip and slipped the photograph into his breast pocket.

"Of course I'll tell."  
"Thank you for doing this son…"

Riley stood up so quickly that he almost knocked over the chair. His throat felt constricted. He couldn't stay in the room any longer and he felt cold sweat appear on his forehead.

"I'm not doing this for you," he said huskily. "I'm doing this for Mikey."

"I meant what I said," his father whispered as he gazed t him. "That things are different now…_I'm _different now."

Riley began to back up to the door. "Even if things are different," he choked, "It doesn't matter. It's too late for that." He fumbled at the doorknob. "It's too late for anything."

He left.

-

_In the dark with the music on _

_Wishing I was somewhere else _

_Taking all your anger out on me, somebody help _

_I would rather rot alone _

_Then spend a minute with you _

_I'm gone, I'm gone _

_And you can't stop me from falling apart _

_'Cause my self-destruction is all your fault _

_How could you, how could you, how could you hate me? _

_When all I ever wanted to be was you? _

_How could you, how could you, how could you love me? _

_When all you ever gave me were open wounds? _

_Downstairs the enemy sleeps _

_Leaving the TV on _

_Watching all the dreams we had turn into static _

_Doesn't matter what I do _

_Nothing's gonna change _

_I'm never good enough _

_And you can't stop me from falling apart _

_'Cause my self-destruction is all your fault _

_Tell me why you broke me down and betrayed my trust in you _

_I'm not giving up, giving in when will this war end? _

_When will it end??__  
_

_How could you, how could you, how could you hate me?_

_When all I ever wanted to be was you?_

_How could you, how could you, how could you love me?_

_When all you ever gave me were open wounds?_

_How could you, how could you_

_How could you, how could you_

_All I ever wanted to be was you,_

_All you ever gave me were open wounds!_

-

Ben and Abigail looked up as Riley emerged from the hospital room. He looked as pale as a ghost and he wavered and leaned on the wall. Ben was ready to catch him because he was half-expecting him to fall over.  
"Riley?" he asked in concern. His friend didn't answer. Instead he straightened up and hurried past them without a word. The couple looked at each and followed after him.

They trailed him to the parking lot. The sun was nearly set now save for a few stray rays that cast the orange light against the cars. They watched Riley slow down and then stop. He suddenly slammed his hand into the hood of a car, not caring whose it was. Riley was trembling his face was white and he raised a hand scratching through his hair.

"Riley?" Abigail said softly. He snapped his head around to look at her and then just like that everything took flight from his demeanor. He deflated, the fury that lined his face vanished and he took a trembling breath. Now he just looked exhausted.

He ran a hand over his eyes.  
"Riley," Abigail pressed again. "What happened."  
He shook his head, hands brushing over the smooth hood of a car, as if apologizing for hitting it earlier.

"Sweetheart, if there's something wrong we need to know."  
Riley's blue eyes flicked up sharply and he looked saddened.

"Oh Abigail…" he whispered. "I'm sorry."

She moved forward and pulled his head to her shoulder speaking softly to him. Riley made a sound that could have been interpreted as a whimper but then he fell silent. Ben watched sadly as his friend regained his control. Riley rested there for a moment drawing in deep steadying breaths.

He drew away from Abigail and looked at both his friends.

"My dad has another son…" he began softly. Silence abounded for a few moments, shock etched into the seconds. "My half-brother."

Riley continued, "His name is Mikey. He's six years old…" he closed his blue eyes. It was like drawing the blinds on a cloudless day. The dim light reflected off the side of his face. "Six. His mom didn't want him. Mikey was taken away from my father….by drug-dealers because my dad used to be linked to them and he couldn't pay them back…that's where Mikey is right now. That's why my dad needs help." Riley's voice broke and he couldn't say anything else.

A look of horror passed over them and Riley let out a sigh.  
"Are the police looking for him?" Ben asked.

"No…if the police were involved that would be a death-threat against Mikey. For all anyone knows, he's already dead."  
Abigail rubbed his back. "Your father wants you to pay them off to get Mikey back."  
"Yes…of course I'll do it. But…these guys should be arrested. Do you think Agent Sadusky can help?"

"I can call him," Ben said immediately. "Everything will be fine Riley. We're going to get Mikey back, okay?"  
"Okay…" Riley whispered. "God…how can this happen? I find out I have another living breathing relative…and he's an innocent child. He's just a kid, and he might be…dead….or I don't even know… " He broke off and put a hand over his mouth. "Ben…" he whimpered. "Please can you call?"

Ben moved forward and put a hand on Riley's shoulder.  
"I'll call him right now, Riley."

Ben took out his cell phone and began to dial.

"Hello, Agent Sadusky? It's Ben Gates…" He continued to speak in urgent low tones.

Abigail turned to Riley. He was not looking well at all.

"Riley, you don't look that great."  
"Thanks Abi," he said with a weak smile. "I appreciate the compliment."  
"You know what I mean," she sighed in exasperation.

"Yeah…I know…" Riley swallowed. Ben had gotten off the phone and was staring at Riley in worry. "Sadusky said that they will look into it right away…he's going to need to question you later. Is that okay?"

Riley nodded and his arm blindly went out to rest on a car.

"Yeah…" his voice was wavering violently. "That's fine."

Riley suddenly looked like he was having some sort of panic attack. He backed away Ben and Abigail a few paces before sinking onto the concrete.

"Riley!" Abigail cried and knelt down next to him.

"Please…don't touch me …right now…I'm okay…" he muttered. Ben shook his head and knelt down on Riley's other side studying him carefully.

Yup, there they were. Unshed tears behind his blue eyes. Riley was reacting as if either of his friends touched him he would bust wide open.

"Riley…" He reached a hand out but Riley pulled away looking at the ground. "Riley, please."

Where in the world did this suddenly come from? He had no idea what was said between Riley and his father. And he didn't need to know because Riley would tell him in his own time. But the last thing Ben was going to let him do was block him out again. For a second time Ben tried to touch him and his heart sank when Riley flinched away again. "Ben…don't…I'm absolutely fine…" he lied, his breathing became shallower. "I don't need help…I don't need it…"  
Ben reached out again and this time managed to clasp Riley around the arm. He felt Riley try and jerk away.

"Ben, leave me alone!" Riley yelled. "I can handle this myself!"

"Riley…" Ben felt himself choke up and a tear slipped out of his eye. Abigail was looking at her husband sadly and even Riley turned to him.

"Don't…please…you know that we just want to be there for you," he said, a sob escaping him. "Don't pull away any more."

Riley was gazing at him with an unreadable expression. Then to both Abigail and Ben's surprise and relief Riley leaned into his friend's touch and borrowed his face into his shoulder. Ben heard him breathing unevenly and he rested his cheek on Riley's head. Abigail placed her arm around his back. She figured he needed comfort at the moment.

"I just…" Riley's voice was slightly muffled by Ben's shirt. "I wish things were different with me and my dad. I really wanted them to be. And he's dying now. And Mikey won't have a dad. And I need to get him back. I need to get him back."  
Abigail gently stroked Riley's shoulder. "We'll get him back. I promise it'll all turn out all right."  
Ben heard Riley let out a trembling sigh. He wasn't crying although he sounded incredibly close to it. But a good sign was Riley didn't pull away from them. That was something at least.

-

Angst alert! What did you guys think or the chappie:-/ I had to post it because I was sick of tinkering with it.

**Credits:** One scene inspired by the book _Mole People _by Jennifer Toth. Good book if you haven't read it. The song is called _Open Wounds _by the band Skillet.

**A/N:** Once again sorry for the extremely slow updates! I am so totally finishing this even if it kills me! Argh! So it took me a while to write Riley and his father's little conversation there. I hope I did okay with it --

**Another A/N:** If I don't update in a while don't be afraid to PM me or something. I might need some prodding.

**Another another A/N:** I love the smell of freshly brewed reviews.


	8. The Rescue

A/N: Wooot. Thank you to **Rose of Hope, daisyduke80, mitchellhp, momiji'sunusedhalo, maddie, Torilei, Majestik Moose, BandGeek58407** and **stupid101 **for the reviews!! :DDDDDDDD HUGS

A/N: This chapter has snippets kind of in rapid-fire succession. They kind of jump from scene to scene. Sorry if it seems a little jarring.

TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT  
Riley sat across from Agent Sadusky, from time to time shifting uncomfortably in his chair. The man was swamped, agents kept coming into the room, running paper work by him or telling him he had a call. He had hardly gotten in a sentence to Riley.  
Finally he sighed in annoyance. "Okay, everyone is just going to have to wait until I finish this very important meeting with Mr. Poole over here. Kapeesh?"  
The people in the room mumbled their acknowledgments and left the office.

"Wow…that was pretty impressive," Riley commented. This guy certainly knew how to call the shots. Sadusky chuckled and turned back to Riley. It might have been a trick of his eyes (they weren't what they used to be) but the kid looked…wore-down. A far cry from the Riley he remembered meeting after the Templar treasure. Then again his little brother was being held for ransom…that would make anyone look less then their prime.  
"Thank you again for taking the time…" Riley began. Agent Sadusky held up a hand. "Thank _you_ for bringing this case to our attention. I know how harrowing this is…"  
"I really just want to get Mikey back. That's all…" Riley trailed off.

Sadusky nodded and shuffled some papers on his desk.

"We talked to your father and he gave us what information he could about the drug ring. Apparently it's very underground, hard to pinpoint exactly…but we now have a finger on it thanks to this new information."  
Riley sat up excitedly in the chair. "So can you get Mikey back then?"  
"Well," Sadusky sighed. "That's the tricky part. Riley, I'm going to ask you do something. And please understand that you can most certainly refuse."  
"Oookay…" Riley said and raised an eyebrow.

"Someone has to make the exchange. We need to be sure to bust this thing wide open but someone needs to be inside of it. Since Jonathan Poole is out of commission, you are the next best bet."  
Riley nodded thoughtfully. "So I'll be the one giving him the money to get Mikey back."  
"Right. If you do decide for this, a microphone will be hidden on your person so we can know the exact moment to move in."  
The gray-haired man was studying the young man intensely.

"This is not a risk free situation Mr. Poole. You could be seriously injured or worse."

"I'll do it," Riley decided after only a few moments of silence.

"Really?" Sadusky said mildly surprised at the snap decision. "May I ask why?"  
Riley shrugged and studied a duck calendar hanging in the office. Why the heck did Sadusky have a _duck _calendar?

"I don't have that much to loose. I mean, if it goes well Mikey is safe and the drug-dealers are arrested. If I get killed, at least…it was doing something worthwhile."  
Sadusky nodded excepting that answer. The kid would do well in the FBI. That attitude plus his computer prowess…

"Okay. So you know what you're getting into now."  
"Yes sir I do."  
"Good. We'll get your brother back."  
TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

Riley waited anxiously, cell phone in hand. Ben and Abigail were watching nervously and Ben was remained of when he was in FBI custody awaiting Ian's call.

FBI agents sat around with headphones, awaiting Sadusky's signal.

"Now, remember what I told you. Call the number and say you are willing to pay the money for Michael Poole. Just get in and get out. And remember, as far as they know, you're Jonathan Poole."

Riley nodded, his heart pounding slightly. Sadusky nodded to him and the other agents began recording. He dialed in the number and waited for the other line to pick up. Three purring rings sounded then a click.

"Hello," said a scratchy male voice.  
"Yes, I have the money and I am willing to pay the fifty thousand for Mikey."  
"That's good. Guess you got that other son of yours to help you."  
"You could say that."  
"Meet under the Bayside Bridge and two thirty in the morning. Come alone. Don't pull anything, don't bring anyone with you otherwise your precious boy will meet a most unfortunate end."  
_Bastard._

"Is he okay? How is he?" Riley asked hoarsely. He was clutching the phone so tightly to his ear he was almost cutting of circulation. Sadusky looked sharply at him and Ben furrowed his brow anxiously.

"He'll be much better once you bring the fifty thousand in cash, I can assure you Mr. Poole. Two thirty. Don't be late."  
There was a click then silence.

Sadusky sighed and removed the headpiece. Riley had put his head in his hand.

"Riley, are you okay?" Abigail asked worriedly.

Riley nodded, not looking at her. It was strange that he had never met Mikey but he felt like he was willing to do anything to get him back.

TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT  
Abigail paced apprehensively as she watched Riley methodically recount the money, which he then carefully placed into a duffle bag. The crooks had wanted fifty thousand. Riley could pay that easily.

"Riley," she finally spoke her anxieties. "Are you sure about this?"  
Riley flashed her a grin. "Nope."  
"Agent Sadusky said that someone else could go…maybe someone more trained…"  
"He also said I was the best bet…I'm the debtors son so they would more likely be less suspicious of me to then some random person."  
"But…you're …I mean…" Abigail cringed inwardly as she fumbled over her own words. Riley looked up from what he was doing.

"You know I think we had this conversation before. "  
"When?"  
"When you wanted me to stay with you and Ben."  
"But this is…different. "  
He stood up and placed a hand on top of her blond hair. "Abs, I'll be okay."  
She didn't really believe him and her worries were bundled up inside her chest. "Riley, seriously, I'm beginning to think you have a death wish!" Her worry sometimes came out as irritation and sometimes she couldn't help it.

Riley shrugged and turned back to the green paper in the duffle bag. Finally he zipped in closed.

"There. Five hundred- one hundred smack-a-roos. . Hope it's good enough for the..."  
Abigail looked quickly at him. "Riley…"  
"I'm doing this Abigail," he told her firmly. "I'm getting Mikey back." She knew he was serious and there was no stopping him.

If Ben couldn't talk sense into him, no one could. She looked impatiently at her watch. Where was Ben anyway? As if on cue her husband walked into the room. He stopped when he saw Riley clutching the duffle bag.

"Riley…" he sighed. "So you're really gonna do this?"

"Ben, I have to. That's my little brother in there."  
Ben's eyes softened and he studied his friend with some sadness. He recognized the look in Riley because it reminded him of how he felt when he was going to steal the Declaration

"Okay," he said quietly.

Abigail looked helplessly at Ben. "Ben! Please, talk some sense into him. This is crazy."  
"Abi, I don't like this anymore then you do but…it's the right thing." He raised his eyes to look at Riley who had stopped what he was doing and was staring back at him.

"And I don't think we'll be able to convince him not to," Ben said with a small smile. Riley blinked and turned back to the duffle bag. His hand fumbled with the zipper and it took him a few times to get it closed. He carefully avoided both his friend's eyes, not knowing exactly what to say to either of them.

"Yeah. Um, I think I need to go now. They need to bug me…I mean not _bug_ me like, annoy me, but they need to put a micro phone or something on me."  
He started past them, eyes still locked to the floor. Suddenly Abigail reached forward and yanked him into a hug.

"Ow. That was my arm," Riley muttered. Her arms went around him and he felt something wet on his shoulder. It took him a moment to figure out she was crying.

"You're crying?" he asked hoarsely. He gently petted her blond head feeling horrible "Oh…don't cry Abi. I'll be fine. I promise you I'll be fine."

She sniffled and pulled away from him wiping her tears with the back of her hand. Ben draped an arm around her.

"I'm sorry Riley," she sniffed. "Here I am, trying to convince you not to do this when I should be supporting you."

"No, it's okay Abigail. I'm sorry too for being insensitive. It's scary, but I'll say it again. I'll be fine. Okay Blondie?" he said with a grin.

"You know I hate that Riley," Abigail chuckled tearfully.

"I know," her friend said with another smile. Ben squeezed Abigail around the shoulders.

"Riley, we're going to go with you to the FBI van," Ben said as Abigail clumsily swiped at her tears.

Riley bit his lip and nodded. Ben gently ruffled his hair.

"It'll turn out okay."

TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

As Ben drove closer to their destination he couldn't help but feel nervous. He wanted to punch the stupid feeling in the face, trying to convince himself that nothing would go wrong with this whole negotiation. He was proud beyond words that Riley had the courage to do what he was doing…but he was so scared for his best friend and his best friend's little brother.

"Both of you …I'm sorry…"

Riley's words suddenly pierced the silence in the car.  
"About what?" Abigail asked thickly.

"What happened before…all of it…"  
"Riley…" Ben sighed. Riley was looking almost pleadingly at them.  
"You were never supposed to see this. You were never supposed to see _me_."

Ben understood. He knew what Riley meant because he hadn't meant for his friend to see how truly worried and scared he was in the parking lot. But with Riley…how much more vulnerable must he have felt, exposing some dark secret of his past that he never told anyone. Once everything started falling apart for him, and how much it hurt him…it literally broke Ben's heart. He had watched Riley cave in on himself, barely holding himself together by the seams. He had been there with him through his nearly incapacitating panic, his bipolar mood swings and constant nightmares.

And somehow Ben knew that Riley was stronger the he would ever be.

It was the choices he made and the choice he was making now that proved that Patrick was right. Riley was stronger then they thought.

Ben took another deep breath. "Riley…do me a favor and don't apologize. There is nothing to apologize about."  
"But…"

"What do you want to apologize _for_?" Abigail suddenly snapped. "Telling us what happened? That's a stupid thing to feel sorry about because we would have found out eventually. Then it would have been even worse for us in some ways, because we would have known you didn't tell us and we wouldn't have been able to help you when you needed it most."  
"I'm sor-" Riley caught himself and shook his head. "I just…feel guilty I guess."  
There was a short silence and then Riley spoke again. His voice was tight.

"I just want you to know…that without either of you…I don't think I could have made it through that first night."

He wanted to say more. He really did but he was afraid that if he did something in him would come loose and he couldn't afford to break down now.

Ben had to concentrate really, really hard on the road because the stupid tears came into his eyes again. Abigail didn't say anything but she turned around and kissed Riley on the hand.

TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

They got out of the car. It was dark and eerie outside, so early in the morning. Nobody was in sight save a lone figure strolling up to them which turned out to be Agent Sadusky. H met them and seemed mildly surprised to see the Gates there along with the Poole.

"Mr. and Mrs. Gates…may I ask why you're here?"

"We want to be in the van with the agents," Ben said firmly. "We want to know what's happening with Riley."  
"Ben, you do realize…"

"I know and neither us care about the rules or whatever you're about to say. I want to make sure I can see Riley."  
Sadusky cleared his throat and motioned him away from Riley and Abigail.

He spoke again, but this time in hushed tones. "You do realize that if something goes wrong…you won't be able to do anything. You're going to have to let the FBI handle it."  
"I know," Ben said impatiently. "But I can't leave my friend now. If I can't go with him, I can at least watch with the agents. Surely you understand that."

Sadusky nodded in resignation. "I'm just saying Ben. That's all."  
The head FBI agent clapped Ben on the shoulder and walked toward the younger man. "Riley, we need you now. This is where you guys separate. Agent Spellman will take Ben and Abigail to the van."

Riley looked at his friend and they gave him small smiles of encouragement.

"Come on Poole," Sadusky said gently.

None of them wanted to say goodbye. If they did it felt like something could happen.  
Instead Riley gave them both a smile. "I'll see you in a little bit."  
TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

Sadusky lead Riley into a room with people manning television monitors, wearing headsets.

"This is quite the operation," Riley muttered.

Sadusky was looking around distractedly. "Where is Hendricks when you need him…. Hendricks, where are you?" he called into the room.

A tall man with dark hair hurried forward.

"Sorry sir, I was just talking to Agent Doer,"  
"Yes, I'm sure you were," Sadusky said with a wink causing Hendricks to blush.

"This is Mr. Poole, you're going to be hooking him up with the microphone."  
Hendricks looked and Riley, smiled warmly and pumped his hand.  
"Great, this'll be fun, huh?"

"Yes, fun is the word I was thinking of," Riley said.

"Contact me when everything is ready, I'll give some last minute instructions." Sadusky said looking at his watch. "Not too much time left so let's hustle and bustle people!"  
Sadusky walked briskly out of the room.  
Hendricks motioned to Riley and he followed the agent to a chair in front of a radio transmitter.

Agent Hendricks began wiring the microphone while going over the directions.

"Okay, now don't do anything except give him the money. This is a very delicate situation Mr. Poole. I want to see Mikey safely out of there too…" he sighed and tested to see if the sound picked up. "Once you make the trade and Mikey is with you we're going to go in."  
Riley nodded as he carefully stored the information in his mind.

"Six years old. Can you imagine?" Hendricks murmured to himself. Riley watched the screen monitors and the mechanics in the room with interest. He offered to help set up but since he wasn't certified in the FBI he was politely declined. Feeling a little useless at the moment Riley sighed and turned back to the agent.

"I don't want to pry, but are you used to this kind of stuff? I mean…seeing all sorts of crime…"

"Yes, I'm used to it but…it's always different for me with children." He smiled a little sadly at Riley.

"Why?" Riley couldn't help asking. Immediately he clamped his mouth closed. Man, he really didn't know when to stop talking.

"Sorry, I'll shut up," he muttered apologetically.

Hendricks sighed and shook his head, adjusting something on the receiving end of the radio.

"Me and my wife have been wanting a child for a while," was all he said.  
"Oh." He was a little confused because of what Sadusky had hinted at before with him and Doer…but it was really none of his business.

"Agent Doer is my wife," Hendricks said quickly guessing his thoughts. "We met through this job and we work together! Isn't that great?" Hendricks kept chatting as he studied the wire in his hand. He paused looking around for the proper place to plug it in.

"It's over there," Riley motioned with his hand to a control panel. "Third plug on the second row."  
"Oh! Thanks there Poole. Anyway, she kept her last name though. I'm kind of glad she did…I like it, it fits her. Doer…a go-getter….yup that's Angela for you."

Hendricks finished with the microphone and gave it a pat  
"Test it out."  
Riley cleared his throat and leaned toward the smaller then a thimble sized microphone.

"Testing, one, two, three. Are you working? Hello, microphone are you working?"  
"Angela, honey, how's that for you?"

A blond-haired woman who Riley assumed was Angela grinned and gave him the thumbs up sign.  
Hendricks looked quite pleased with his handiwork. "Nice. Well, that's it. You're ready to go."

Riley gave him a wavering grin and stood up, turning to go.

"Hey," Hendricks called.

Riley turned back. "Yeah?"  
"Good luck! You'll be okay." Hendricks encouraged.

"Seems like everyone is saying that."

TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

"Riley, we're going to be with you every step of the way. We can hear what you're saying, what he's going to say to you. Agents are positioned all over the perimeter. Don't say anything to us, you don't want to give us or yourself away. Don't do _anything _besides give him the money. We'll handle everything else."  
Riley was nodding to nearly everything Sadusky was telling him. No backing out now. Not that he would.

"Okay…so now I just walk under the bridge."  
"Yup. It's almost two thirty. Better get to the meeting place."  
Riley nodded making sure the duffle bag was firmly around his shoulder.  
He stepped out of the other van, the one Ben and Abigail were not in, and took a breath of air. The luminous hands on his watch said two ten. Another twenty minutes. He began to walk toward the bridge.

He felt completely alone but he knew there were agents positioned everywhere, not to mention listening in on what he was saying. It was nice to know, but eerie at the same time. What probably comforted him the most was that Ben and Abigail were listening in. He wasn't sure why he was reassured by that fact. It was almost like knowing your parents were in the audience somewhere even though you couldn't see anything past the blinding spotlight. He sighed and kept walking. Oh well.

Thankfully it was relatively warm outside even in the early morning so he wasn't freezing to death.

After a few more minutes he made it to under the bridge. Everything echoed slightly more there, even his slightly accelerated breathing. He checked his watch again.

Fifteen minutes.

He leaned against the stone and waited.  
Riley began to think about his father, what he had said. How obvious he loved his younger son. There was some part of Riley, in the back of his mind that was hurt deeply by that fact. It almost felt like he was the son that his father messed-up on. So he tried again and became a great loving father. But Riley shook his head clear. He wasn't going to think of those things. Not now.

His thoughts were interrupted by footsteps. Riley looked up sharply and saw two figures approaching, one quite large the other very small.

It took another minute for Riley to see their features clearer. The man seemed to be about seven feet tall, shaved head, and not a very nice look in his eyes.  
Then Riley's eyes traveled to the smaller figure and it felt like his heart went into a strange state of limbo. His little brother. Scared to death for him, yet his heart melted when he finally got to see him.

Mikey was very pale, brown eyes wide and fearful as the man gripped him painfully tight on the shoulder.  
The man stopped and stared at Riley for a moment, eyebrows rising.

"I thought you sounded younger on the phone."

Riley didn't say anything. He was still looking at his brother and as the boy looked back a small smile tugged at the sides of Mikey's mouth.

"You thought you could trick me. You're obviously not Jonathan Poole." The man growled dangerously. Riley finally raised his eyes from his brother and steadily met the eyes of the man. He knew at that moment he would never let anything happen to Mikey.  
"No. I'm his son…here on behalf of my father. He's sick…in the hospital."

Mikey's eyes widened when he heard his father was sick but he didn't say anything.

"Ah…so you're Mr. Riley Poole," the man muttered looking him over again which caused Riley to shift angrily. Then he raised an eyebrow.

"Well, how do I know I can trust you?"  
"I have the cash. That should be good enough for you."

Riley stepped forward; money bundled in a bag. He un-zippered it to show the man who nodded in compliance. Suddenly the man pulled Mikey's arm and twisted it painfully causing the boy to cry out.

"HEY!" Riley couldn't keep the shout of fury from tearing from his throat. He almost went forward but had to literally force himself to stand still, remembering what Sadusky had told him

"Leave him alone! You'll have what you want!"  
"I swear, if you're pulling something…." the thug said threateningly, his iron grip still holding onto a terrified Mikey.  
Riley's stomach twisted and he desperately hoped that Sadusky and company knew what they were doing.

The man was now glaring at him suspiciously. "Come over here and give me the cash and I'll give you the brat."  
Riley gritted his teeth and walked forward with the money in the bag to make the exchange.  
"Here…just let him go…"  
The man's hand suddenly shot forward and painfully latched onto something on Riley's chest.

"OW! What're you-"

He ripped it off causing Riley to gasp in pain.

"You're bugged, you thought you could sneak past me?" he hissed.

Riley's eyes widened in fear. Oh no.

In a terrifying moment he pulled out a gun and pointed it at Mikey's skull. Mikey's fearful brown eyes turned to Riley pleadingly.

TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

Sadusky cursed and removed the headpiece, springing up from his crouched position.

"Move in, move in NOW!" he shouted and gave the signal.

TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

"Let. Go. Of. Him." Riley snarled, cold fury lining his voice. He started forward, blind rage taking control of him.  
"BACK UP!" the man screamed. His gun pressed harder into Mikey's head and he whimpered. Riley stopped in his tracks, shaking with anger.

Suddenly Agents appeared out of nowhere, seemingly coming out of the walls. All of them aimed their guns at the criminal.

"FBI, DROP THE WEAPON! _DROP THE WEAPON!!"_

"If any of you get any closer I'll kill him!"

There were two blasts from a gun and Riley nearly had a heart attack. Panic seared through him for a moment and he stared for what seemed like eternity at the man in front of him.

Both shots went through his head.

Riley unconsciously darted forward and grabbed Mikey away before his captor even hit the ground. Some blood had sprayed onto Riley's face and the back of his brother's hair. Riley knelt down and pulled the now sobbing child into his arms.

"It's okay, you're safe Mikey! It's all over!"  
Riley watched with his stomach churning as the Agents approached the dead body. Blood was absolutely everywhere. He felt nauseated at the carnage before him. Bile rose into his throat. _NO_, he thought to himself. _No, no, no, no_. He was going to be strong for once in his damn life. He was going to be strong for his little brother. Riley averted his gaze and lowered his forehead until it rested on Mikey.

"Oh god," he whispered, closing his eyes.

The boy was still crying and trying to turn around in his arms. Riley pressed him into his shirt.

"Don't look, don't look." Riley murmured. "We're getting you out of here."

Everything seemed like complete chaos around them. Riley gently ran a hand through his brother's hair, still not looking at the scene before him. He was just waiting for something, anything to happen. And all that mattered was the boy clinging to him.

He felt an hand on his shoulder and he finally looked up. It was Angela, the agent he had seen briefly before.

She knelt down and spoke gently to Mikey. "Hi Mikey, my name is Angela. You're safe, no one here is going to hurt you, okay?"  
Mikey peeked at her through Riley's shirt and sniffled, nodding slightly.

"Me and Riley are going to walk you out of here."

Again Mikey nodded and Riley slowly stood up making sure that his brother didn't look behind him. Mikey took one of Angela's hands, the other one still clutching at Riley's shirt.  
Both Riley and the agent gently ushered the six-year-old away from the scene.

TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

Ben and Abigail were absolutely beside them themselves. They had heard everything, heard the shots and for a terrible moment thought the worst of possibilities had happened.

Then an agent assured them their friend was okay along with the boy. Ben literally felt like falling over. Those few moments might have easily been the most terrifying and helpless in his entire life. They both got out of the van.

The summer night was no longer still. Sirens and red flashing lights were everywhere and they waited anxiously for Riley to show up.

Finally they saw him accompanied with and agent. Both of them were helping Mikey along through the chaos.

"Riley-" Abigail began to screech but Riley held a finger to his lips, eyes darting down to Mikey.

She fell silent and nodded. Ben took her hand. Neither of them said anything.

Some EMT workers came forward and Angela was explaining they needed to check to see if Mikey was okay.

But when they started to steer him away from Riley he threw a fit. He began to sob and cling to his older brother tighter.

Riley looked at Agent Spellman imploringly. "Please, let me go with him. Just to calm him down."

The agent nodded in agreement knowing this was the best for the situation.

"We'll follow you in the car," Ben told him. Riley gave him a small smile. They would have to talk later.

Riley climbed into the ambulance with Mikey who was looking fearfully at the medical staff.

"Mikey, these people are going to help you, okay? Don't be scared. I'm right here." Riley soothed running a hand over his brother's hair.

Mikey nodded and settled himself down. Riley found it slightly unnerving that he hadn't heard a single word from his brother yet.

TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

It was either planned some strange coincidence that they ended up going to the same hospital his father was staying at.

Riley sighed and sat on the seat next to Mikey's bed. They were in the pediatric ward which was much nicer then some of the other places in the hospital. More color…more toys…good stuff.

The boy was fast asleep. After such an ordeal he must have been exhausted. Riley felt very weary himself but he wasn't about to sleep until he heard news from the doctor. He needed to know if there was anything wrong with Mikey.

Ben and Abigail had finally joined him much to his relief. He told them briefly what had happened, not wanting to dwell on it too much. They now sat next to him watching Mikey sleep peacefully.

"I can't believe I never knew about him," Riley sighed tiredly.  
"But you know him now," Abigail said.

"Yeah…" Riley answered with a small smile.

They all looked up as the doctor came in. Riley stood up in apprehension.

"Is there anything wrong with him?" Riley asked anxiously.

The doctor sighed look down at his notes.  
"We found some bruising and scars…nothing to serious but can be extremely traumatic for someone his age. We can't get him to talk to us yet, which is normal. Once he develops a trust he will feel comfortable enough again to talk. Hopefully, you'll be able to get that out of him."  
"Okay. Thank you." He turned back to his little brother, sorrow in his blue eyes.

Ben placed a hand on his shoulder and gave it a comforting squeeze.

Riley turned to them and blinked with a tired smile.

"I need to go tell my dad that Mikey's okay," he said softly.

TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

A/N: So as far as formatting goes, this chapter is weird. It might be like that for the next chapter too.

I can haz the reviewz pleez.


	9. The Closing Moments

A/N: Thanks to **fallen.leaves19, Majestik Moose, momiji'sunusedhalo, Torilei, Rose of Hope, supernatural16, BandGeek58407 **and **LupinandHarry **for those lovely reviews! Just a warning, this chapter is kinda sad. And it is NOT the last chapter despite the title. It just tied up some loose ends in the story. Well, please review guys!

-

Riley was nearly trembling as he stood outside the hospital door. He knew he had to go through with this, he had to talk to his father…he wished there was another way. As soon s he thought that he felt selfish…then he felt confused. Everything felt confusing. Ben told him he would wait outside, just like the other time. Riley didn't want to leave his little brother but Abigail said she'd stay with him,

When Riley and Ben left the room Mikey was still fast asleep.

Riley wished he could sleep. He was really tired.

But he couldn't yet. He needed to talk with his father.

As he entered the room he couldn't really believe it was possible that his father looked worse then he did before. Like death maybe. Pale. His liver was rapidly failing him…years of drinking had finally done him in and Riley had a strange feeling that his father knew this.

Wires and tubes were attached to him, he was breathing harshly. It sounded horrible, like a lung filling up with water.

Riley sat down was silent for a few moments irrationally hoping he wouldn't have to go through with this again.

Instead he sat there, feeling his stomach squirm slightly at the all to familiar sterile smell and that high-pitched beeping. And that pain-chart. It was a cartoon looking character in different stages of pain. He wondered if he was the only one who found it disturbing.  
"Riley…?" The scratchy voice caused Riley to jump. His father was slowly waking up.

"I didn't think you'd come back."

"I said I'd tell you when Mikey's safe," Riley answered.

"You got him back?" murmured his father. His eyes filled with tears but he was too weak to even lift up his head. "He's okay?"

"Yeah," Riley assured softly. "He's sleeping in the pediatric ward."

"Oh…that is really…" Jonathan's face contorted as he pressed his lips together, tears of relief springing down his face. "Thank you."  
Riley swallowed and looked down at his hands, a strange feeling creeping into his chest. "I guess…well…he can visit you as soon as he's allowed."  
To his surprise, Jonathan shook his head. "No…I don't want him to see me like this. "

"But…I would think…."

"Riley, he wouldn't understand…I don't have that much time left anyway."

"Wow…okay what?"

"I'm dying, Riley."

"Dad…."

"At least…I won't have to be tormented everyday…with your mother's face. There's not a day that goes by when I don't think of her…and Miriam and Kimberly."

Riley froze and looked at his ailing father. All the horror and unresolved crap in his life seemed it his him with a sledgehammer.

"Did you even care, dad?" he found himself whispering.

"Of course I care."

"It…didn't seem like it."  
Jonathan nodded. "I know."  
"You…drank all the time. And…I don't understand…why," his voice cracked on the last word and he had to take a breath before continuing. "you had to hurt me."  
God, what was he doing? Why was he even talking to this man who had caused him so much grief?

"I thought that after the accident…something would change…I don't know…anything…but it was worse. Everything was worse with you. I was so screwed up dad. I don't think normal ten year olds are suicidal."

Riley let out a shaky breath. "I wasn't there for a funeral…for anything. It's like they just disappeared…you didn't tell me where they were buried…"  
"Riley, you and I both ….know you could've… have easily looked that up…"  
"That's not the _point_ dad," Riley choked. "I didn't get to say goodbye… and afterwards I lived with possibly the most miserable excuse for foster parents to grace this planet and you know what?" Riley found he couldn't stop now. His voice was shaking and his chest was aching. "You know how screwed up this was? I found myself thinking that these people who treated me like a heaping mound of crap were preferable to living with you!"  
His father hadn't said anything and was just looking at him with a tired and saddened expression.

"There is nothing," he said in a low voice, "Nothing I can ever say…that will let you know…how truly…sorry I am."  
"You're right," Riley choked, "I'll never know…I don't want to know."

"Okay…" his father sighed and his breathing grew harsher. The horrible machines attached to him began to beep.

Riley looked quickly at the heart monitor and he found himself unsurprised when he saw the heart rate slowing alarmingly.

"Look after your little brother…" his father coughed.

Riley nodded, feeling the color drain from his face.

"I told him…a lot about you…you're like his hero."

Riley shook his head putting a hand over his mouth.

_Oh no…not while I'm here…don't die._

"Can you lean forward, son?" Jonathan whispered hoarsely. It seemed to take all his energy.

"What?" Riley croaked.

"I just want to...say goodbye."

Riley edged closer to his father who lifted up his hand to caress Riley's cheek.

Riley couldn't stop himself from flinching as the hand made contact.

"Oh Merciful God, forgive me," whispered his father sadly. "I did this to you."

It felt like was something ripping loose in Riley's chest. Then he said the worst thing he could have possibly said to his dying father.  
"I still can't forgive you, you know."  
His father nodded.  
"Well, you came… didn't you? That's something," he slurred, eyes beginning to shut.

"That's something," Riley nodded. His chest was going to burst open. Jonathan smiled at him and closed his eyes. Riley turned to the monitor. The beeping had gotten slower and slower.

Then it flat lined.

Riley stood up and left as nurses and doctor began to rush past him.

-

As Riley walked in a trance like state out of the emergency room he was barley aware of the sounds behind him. He didn't turn around when he heard the doctor shouting to clear the area before applying the deliberator.

His father was gone, he knew it, and he was sure his father was expecting it.

Ben was waiting there and not looking at the frantic action in the emergency room either. He was looking at Riley.

As his friend approached him, Ben immediately stood up.

Riley didn't even slow as he came toward him he just walked into Ben's arms. Ben wrapped him into a tight embrace as Riley clung to him.

Then a sob tore from Riley's throat. And another. And another.

Then it was like an all out torrent of emotion broke loose, clawing painfully out of his lungs. Riley began to weep, his face buried in Ben's shirt.

"It's okay," Ben muttered. "It's okay."

Ben had never seen his friend break down like this. He had seen solitary and repressed tears, pain lingering just under the surface, but he had never _ever _seen him cry like he was now. In fact, he had never seen anyone cry like Riley was. Not even his father when his grandfather died.

"I-I'm sorry…I don't know why…I'm being such a freak…right now…" Riley managed to say in between sobs.  
"Riley," Ben said, throat tight. "Riley, just…let it out. I'm here. I'm right here."  
Riley let out a strangled cry and doubled over and Ben had to support him. "Easy buddy. Easy now."  
People were turning and staring out of sympathy or averting their eyes. Ben thought briefly about trying to get Riley out into the parking lot or something. But his friend was practically falling over and Ben was more preoccupied with making sure he didn't collapse into an emotional heap.

Ben steered him to some nearby chairs one of which Riley practically fell into.

Riley wept for a long time, feeling like a dam burst and the water wouldn't stop flowing. He had never cried like that in his entire life.

Now everything seemed to just come out from some hidden place he forgot existed.

The pain had been dulled too much. Now his body felt it dead on and couldn't contain all of it.

Ben just held him, rocking him gently until the flood played itself out.

"I don't understand," Riley cried brokenly, tears running down his cheeks. "Ben, I don't understand. "

Sobs wracked Riley's body as his friend leaned into him, years of unshed tears and pain finally unloading themselves into his shirt.

"I know…It's okay…shhh…" The older man murmured into his hair over and over again.

Riley's tumultuous emotions finally began to play themselves out. His sobbing quieted down.

"Riley, lean forward," came Ben's calming voice. Riley obeyed and felt a warm damp washcloth pressed to the back of his neck. He wondered where the heck Ben had gotten it because it seemed to have magically appeared out of nowhere.  
"Just take a few deep breaths, Ri." Ben said gently. "Deep breaths."

Riley began draw in calming breaths into his lungs.

"There we go. You're okay, Riley."

Ben held the washcloth there for a little while, watching as his friend slowly regained control. His sobs died down and they were replaced by shaking sighs. Ben removed the washcloth, which a nurse had been nice enough to give to him, The physical contact seemed to be helping so he kept his arm around Riley's shoulders.

Finally Riley sat up and shrugged off Ben, wiping his face with the back of his sleeve. Ben reached into his pocket and handed him a packet of tissues.

"Thanks," Riley breathed. He felt drained both physically and emotionally.

He let out a tearful chuckle. "Convenient...you had those tissues."

Ben shrugged with a slight smile, eyes studying Riley carefully. "I was expecting it."  
"You were expecting …me to have an emotional breakdown?" Riley asked wiping his face with the tissues. His face probably looked terrible.

"I guess you could say that." Ben said quietly. "Are you okay now?"

"I got your… shirt gross again," Riley muttered. His lungs kept contracting into these small breathy hiccups.

Ben rolled his eyes. "It doesn't matter. But Ri, are you okay?"

Riley sighed and looked at his friend. "I don't know. How am I supposed to feel?"  
"I don't know. You tell me."  
Riley blinked his bloodshot eyes at Ben and took another breath. He seemed to be carefully considering his friend's question. After a while he answered. "I think I feel lighter."

"Lighter?"  
"Yeah…like some sort of weight came off my chest."

"That's…really good Riley." Ben said, relief flooding through him.

"Good? This was good?"  
"Do you really feel like a weight went off you?"  
"Yeah…"  
"Then Ri, this was very good," Ben said gently.

"Weird," Riley mumbled.

Riley felt so exhausted. He leaned his head back against the wall. He squirmed around a little bit but couldn't get comfortable. For the first time in a long time he actually wanted to sleep.

"Here, you can sleep on my shoulder," Ben offered. Riley shrugged but decided it was better then sleeping against the wall. Ben took a jacket and scrunched it up into a makeshift pillow and propped it up on his shoulder. Riley leaned against the fabric and immediately felt his eyes closing.

"Ben?" he said fuzzily.

"Yeah Riley?"  
"Thank you."

Then he fell asleep.

-

Abigail hurried down the hallway, trepidation in her steps. Ben had just called her explaining vaguely that Riley's father had just died and Riley had an emotional breakdown.

She had made sure a nurse was in the room that her friend's little brother was sleeping soundly in, in case he woke up. She didn't want to leave him for long and she new Riley would be annoyed at her for leaving her assigned "post" but Mikey was fine and she had to make sure Riley was too.

She spotted her husband and hurried over to where he was seated. Riley was sleeping soundly on his shoulder and Ben looked drained.  
"Ben, is he okay? I came as soon as you called."  
Ben let out a shuddering sigh he had been holding in.

"I think his dad dying was what…pushed him over the edge. He had a complete meltdown, Abi."  
Abigail looked sadly at Riley. "Is he going to be okay? Should we…?" She didn't even know.

"He's okay, I asked him. I think this was good for him, it got his emotions he's been repressing out."  
Abigail nodded. Her mother had said something like that once. Sometimes crying was a good thing.  
Abigail watched Riley and he stirred in his sleep.

"He looks so peaceful."  
"Yeah," Ben smiled, turning his head to look at his best friend. "He does."

-

_"Riley, honey, wake up." That voice was so familiar. So beautiful.  
Riley slowly opened his eyes. He wasn't sure where he was but it was bright and he felt peaceful.  
"Riley!" another voice said, this one younger and more insistent. "Come on you lazy bones!"_

_"Riii-bread…mommy wants you to wake up!" said a final innocent voice that sounded like light. Riley fully opened his eyes and blinked. And there was his mother, Miriam and Kimberly all smiling at him._

_"Am I dead?" he whispered.  
"No silly," Miriam giggled. "This is a dream."  
Kimberly suddenly darted forward and Riley found his arms full of his little sister._

_"Kim…I miss you. I miss you so much," he choked out. The little girl reached out her small hand and brushed at his tears. "Don't cry Ri-bread! Everything's gonna be okay."  
"Yeah," Miriam put in as she hopped onto his lap next to her sister. "You got Ben and Abi. There're really nice Riley."_

_His mother came forward and gently ran a hand through his hair._

_"Mom…?" he asked softly.  
"What is it honey," she asked caressing his cheek.  
"I couldn't forgive dad. I just couldn't…"  
"Forgiveness is a process. Give it time Riley."_

_"But…"  
"Riley." He looked up at his mother, dark hair and all. She leaned forward and gently kissed him on the forehead. "Healing will come. I promise. You take care of Mikey, okay? Be good to your little brother. We love you Riley."  
All three of them wrapped their arms around him,_

_"Don't go…please don't go…please…don't leave me alone…" he whispered._

_"You're not alone," he mother comforted. "You have your friends. You have Mikey now."_

_"But it hurts."  
"Then let it hurt Riley. Don't hide it, let it heal."  
Riley clutched onto them tighter. "I don't want to leave you."  
"Let it go Riley. Darling, you need to let it go."_

_Riley hesitated for a moment. Then he let them go. His family smiled at him and seemingly began to fade away in front of his eyes._

_"We love you Riley!"  
"Bye-bye Ri-bread!"  
Riley watched them disappear. "Goodbye," he whispered._

-

Riley slowly began to return to reality. He really didn't want to. It had been such a nice dream...and great, a headache. As soon as he woke up. Lovely.

He heard Ben talking quietly to someone. He wondered how long it had been since he had fallen asleep. Stirring, he opened his eyes, head still resting on Ben's shoulder.

Ben turned slightly toward his friend. "Are you up?" he asked quietly. Riley nodded. His head felt really heavy and his eyes felt cracked with gross stuff around them.

"Hey sweetheart," said Abigail's voice. Riley looked at her and smiled a little bit.

"Hey Abi," he said softly. His voice was hoarse. Abigail was kneeling in front of him. She ran a gentle hand through his unkempt hair.

"How are you doing?" she asked tenderly.  
"Okay," he said, nestling his head into the coat fabric.

"Okay?" asked Abigail, continuing to stroke his hair.

"Mmhmm," he murmured.

The three of them sat like that for a while and Abigail continued brushing back Riley's hair.

"I just had the best dream," he whispered.

"Really? "Ben asked.

Riley nodded and smiled. "My Mom and two sisters were there."  
Abigail felt herself choke up a little bit and even Ben felt tears come to his eyes.

"That's wonderful, Riley," said Abigail.  
Riley stayed where he was for a few more moments. Then he heavily lifted his head off of Ben's shoulder. It gave a few dull throbs.

"How long was I sleeping?" he asked, wiping his eyes.

"About an hour."  
Riley nodded. "Did any doctors come by or anything?"  
"Not yet. "  
Riley sighed. He felt completely drained but not even in a bad way. It felt like he had room to breathe now.  
"Mikey," he suddenly said. "How is he? Hey, you're supposed to be watching him Abi!" Riley said annoyed. He sprang up, a little to fast because his legs wobbled a bit and Abigail clasped onto his arm to steady him.

"Riley, he's fine. I made sure a nurse was with him. When I left he was still sleeping and I don't think in the fifteen minutes I've been gone something drastic happened."

"So, what…you come over here because _Ben_," he shot a look at his friend, "Called you up to tell you about the waterworks?"

Abigail looked affronted and Riley realized how bitter he probably sounded. Abigail just wanted to make sure he hadn't completely lost it.

"I'm sorry Abi…" he sighed. He ducked his head and motioned over to the pediatric ward. Abigail was startled to see that he was blushing. She realized how intensely embarrassed he must have been because of the whole situation.

"I'm going to be with Mikey. You guys don't have to stay. You can go home, I'll be okay."

"Riley…" Ben began and Riley held up a hand.

"Ben, it's okay. I'll be okay." Riley assured. "I'll be here all night and you both need to sleep."  
"But-"  
"Ben." Riley's eyes held a slightly imploring look. "Please. You've both done so much, and right now…well, there's nothing else you can really do unless you feel like disfiguring your back by sleeping in a hospital chair. You two get some rest. I want to stay with Mikey…"

Ben let out a deep breath. He was unhappy about leaving his friend in the hospital, but he saw that Riley wanted to be alone with his brother. Ben suddenly felt a pang of remorse for both the Pooles. For Mikey because he was about to learn his father had died and died and for Riley because he was the one who would have to tell him. They were both orphans in some respects and it seemed the only family they had now were each other.

"Okay Riley. But if anything-"  
"Yes, if anything happens you'll be the first to know about it. Scouts honor."  
Abigail moved forward and gave him a tight hug. "We'll see you tomorrow then."

"Uh-huh. Thanks Abs."

Ben smiled and took his turn giving his friend a hug. "Goodnight buddy."  
"Thanks again Ben," Ben heard his young friend mutter into his shirt.

"Anytime. We'll call you tomorrow."  
Riley watched his friends turn and go. He checked his watch and grimaced. According to it, it almost _was _tomorrow.

-  
Riley poked his head into the pediatric ward, wondering if his little brother was still sleeping. Not wanting to wake him or any of the other children who may have been sleeping he tiptoed over to the chair. Unfortunately his foot came down on what he assumed was a toy truck, it was to dark to tell, and his leg flew out from under him, He fell to the ground with a dull thud. _Owch._ He winced and counted the seconds, hoping he didn't wake any poor kid up.

It seemed like everything was still quiet so he picked himself up and settled onto the chair. He looked at his younger brother and was startled to see him now awake and blinking at him.

"Hey Mikey," Riley said quietly with a grin. Mikey smiled back and snuggled further under the blankets. Riley scooted his chair closer to the bed.

"Do you want me to get something for you?" Riley asked in a whisper, hoping his brother would talk to him.

Mikey clutched the pillow to him for a moment. "Wolfie?"  
Riley smiled hearing the words, his heart easing up in his chest a bit. "Who's that?"

"My friend."  
"Yeah? Is he here?"  
"No…"  
"Is he a wolf?"

"Yeah."

Riley figured Wolfie was a stuff animal he wanted for comfort. He glanced around and spied another stuffed animal, except it was a tiger. Riley picked it up and put it on his lap.

"Well, I can't get Wolfie but do you want another animal for now?"  
Out of loyalty to Wolfie, Mikey shook his head no.

"Oh, okay. Well…he'll stay right here tonight." Mikey giggled as Riley made the tiger hop back onto his lap.

Riley sighed and studied the stuffed animal. He wanted to tell him what happened to their father before the boy asked. Except he had no idea how to bring it up or what to say. He wasn't entirely sure Mikey would understand completely.

"Mikey…" Riley began, looking his little brother in the eyes. "I need to tell you something."  
Mikey nodded uneasily, sensing the change in his older brother.

"Did you know that…dad was sick?"  
Mikey nodded again.

"Okay. Well…sometimes when people get really sick, they can't get better…"  
"He didn't get better?" Mikey whispered, in a quivering voice.

Riley swallowed and shook his head.

"He's gone Mikey."

"He's gone?" Mikey whimpered.

"Yes," Riley said gently.

His little brother didn't say anything else, he just began to cry softly. Riley felt his heart break and he leaned forward partially pulling Mikey into his arms.

His crying eventually tapered off into silence as he fell asleep, hands loosely gripping Riley's shirt. Sighing, Riley gently uncurled Mikey from him, laid his younger brother back onto his pillow and tucked him in. Riley was dead tired and he felt himself slumping forward, leaning halfway on Mikey's bed. He closed his eyes and felt the darkness take him.

-

He was awakened sharply at the light from the outside hall pierced into the dark room. He pulled his head up from the bed. The bed sheets had created an indent on his face. To his surprise he saw Agent Sadusky peering at him through the darkness. He motioned at Riley who glanced at Mikey. Thankfully still asleep. Quietly he made his way out into the hallway after the Agent. Everything felt slightly surreal, but then again at this early in the morning it always felt surreal.

"What's going on Sadusky?" Riley asked his voice still thick with sleep, hoping nothing bad had come up.

"How's your brother doing?"  
"The doctor said he was okay. Just some minor cuts and bruises. Hopefully he'll be out of here in a day or so."  
Sadusky nodded looking relieved. "I just thought I'd let you know that the people who were holding Mikey, along with the rest of the drug traffickers have been put away. They won't bother either of you anymore."

"That's great news. Thank you sir."  
Sadusky cleared his throat. "I heard what happened…with your father. I'm very sorry."  
Riley didn't say anything only nodding his thanks and looking at the ground.

"But this causes some complications for your brother. He has no one else to look after him…we contacted his mother but she…well, let's just say it's better off if Mikey wasn't in her care."  
"So then, what's going to happen to him?" Riley asked in concern.

"Unless someone wishes to take him in he will be placed in a children's home."  
Riley shuddered, at the thought. "You mean an orphanage?"  
"Well, they're not really called that anymore in the States, but yes, essentially."

"No," Riley shook his head. "I don't want him staying there…I was in the system, Sadusky, and I was put with horrible foster parents. I don't want that happening to him. If he's going to stay with anyone I want to make sure they're alright myself."  
"Understandable," Sadusky acknowledged. "And I think that can be arranged. In fact, the couple who are interested in taking care of him are here now. That's one of the reasons I came here."  
"What?" Riley was confused. It was literally only hours since Mikey had come into the hospital. And it was three in the morning. Who could have already heard about this?

Riley turn to see Hendricks and Angela walking toward him with almost apprehensive looks on their faces.

"Hendricks?" Riley asked in surprise. Hendricks smiled, an arm around his wife. "You can call me David."  
"You two want to take care of Mikey?" Riley wanted to make sure. Angela nodded looking up at her husband.

"We both wanted kids for a long time…and well, after tonight…I couldn't get him out of my mind. We've been talking about adopting or fostering for a while…"  
Angela looked uncertainly at Riley. "I know you're his older brother…maybe you don't like the idea of us taking him and I understand."  
"No…well maybe a little," Riley sighed. "But he needs parents, a mom and a dad. That's something I can't give him."

Sadusky stepped forward, speaking up. "Community-based care may take a few weeks to process through."  
"We understand that, sir," David nodded.

"Until then Mikey will have to stay in a children's home."  
"What? No way!" Riley said in an appalled voice. "I'm not leaving him in some creepy institution where he's all alone."  
"Now Riley it will only be temporary-"  
"No! He's not going to stay there," he persisted stubbornly. "Can't I watch him for a few weeks? Until David and Angela take him in?"  
Sadusky raised and eyebrow and smile quirking on his lips. "Well, I don't really see the harm in that."

Riley let out a relieved smile. He was still dead tired.

"Look why don't you all get some more sleep. We can finish this up later, okay?" Sadusky said to Riley, David and Angela.

They all nodded and said goodbye to each other. Riley went back into the room and sat down again next to his brother. Mikey was sleeping, leftover tearstains on his face from before. Riley gently brushed the tears away and leaned back in his seat. He thought briefly about calling but decided against it. He would tell him when he got to the hospital in a few hours. This time it took longer for sleep to take him.

-

The next morning Ben and Abigail were back in the car, driving to the hospital. Ben had called Riley's cell phone and was waiting for him to pick up. One ring..two rings..

"Hello?" he asked a blurry voice. Ben winced a little. It sounded like Riley had a less sleep then they did.

"Hey, we're coming back over there. Do you want us to pick you up some breakfast or something?"  
"What? Ben? Oh, no it's fine."  
"Come on, I don't think that hospital food is full of sustenance."  
"It probably is…because its _hospital_ food."

"Well…even so it doesn't taste good. We'll get you and Mikey some breakfast. What do you want?"

"Maybe a blueberry muffin with orange juice for Mikey…"

"Okay sounds good, but what do you want to eat Riley? You need to start off your day on the right level of energy."  
He thought he heard Riley groan. "You speak too fast and too loud."  
"Riley." Ben warned.

"Okay, okay…uh…I guess coffee for me…lots…and lots…of coffee."  
Ben let out a very audible sigh, making sure Riley heard his disapproval. Not exactly nutritious.

"I need caffeine Ben."

"Alrighty. We'll see you it a bit, okay Ri?"

"Okay…thanks Ben….and, oh, Ben?"  
Ben quickly returned the phone to his ear. "Yeah Riley?"  
"Uh, never mind. I'll tell you and Abigail when you get here."

"Okay. See you soon."  
Ben clicked off the phone and sighed again. Turning to a questioning Abigail he said, "Pit stop at Dunkin' Donuts."

Riley shut the phone and looked at his watch. It was already almost eleven. Quickly he returned into Mikey's room to see that his little brother was sitting up and rubbing his eyes. Riley didn't know about the mourning processes of children but he knew Mikey was still sad from the news the night before.

"Good morning Mikey," Riley said softly repositioning himself to sit down.

Mikey clutched his pillow, moist brown eyes looking at Riley.

"Can I go home?" Mikey asked sadly.

Riley swallowed and shook his head. "You're going to stay with me for a little while okay?"  
Although he was still unhappy Mikey brightened slightly and sat up in the bed.

"Really?" he asked hopefully.

"Yup." Riley smiled.

A pretty nurse suddenly bustled in and smiled at them both. "Good morning…I'm just checking up on Mikey now."  
"Okay," Riley said and smiled back, scooting his chair backward to give the nurse some room.

The nurse produced a blood pressure monitor and velcroed it to his upper arm.

"How are you doing Mikey?" she asked him. He remained silent as she squeezed the contraption a few times and then let it loose.

"Normal blood pressure," she said reading off the monitor, then commencing to check his eyes and ears.

After that was done she took out a syringe and began to put it together. Riley winced slightly and Mikey's eyes went wide.  
"Alright Mikey, you've been great so far. This is just going to be a little prick okay?"  
Mikey turned his anxious eyes to Riley who took his hand.

"It'll by fine buddy, just a second."  
The nurse quickly dabbed on the alcohols and slipped the shot into his arm. Riley felt Mikey's hand tighten in his but he didn't even make a peep.

_What a brave kid, _Riley thought a little sadly.

"There we go. Told you it would be done in a second," the nurse smiled. She reached into her pocket producing some very nice looking lollipops.

"Do you want a lollipop?" she asked Mikey, holding them out to him. Mikey paused contemplatively and selected a bright red one with a smile.

"How about you sir," said this nurse with a grin at Riley. "Would you like one?"  
"Well, I dunno," Riley pretended to think. "Do you have apple?"

"No, but I can go to our lollipop storage facility and get one for you," she said, flashing a pretty smile at him.  
_Is she flirting with me? _Riley thought in surprise.

"That's okay. I'll just have another cherry one." Riley said. She plucked one out and handed it to Riley who thanked her.

"Have a good day," the nurse said cheerily to them. She left the room leaving both Poole brothers sucking contentedly on their cherry lollipops.  
Riley's cell phone buzzed again and he looked to see a text from Ben. _We're here, be up in a minute. _Hmm, he should tell Mikey he was going to have visitors.

"Mikey, my friends are coming to visit. They're really nice. You'll like them."  
"Okay," Mikey said trustfully.

Riley looked around the room and went over to the blinds, pulling them open to let more light in. The sun was already high in the sky. "There we go. Much better."

There was a soft rap on the door and Riley looked up expectantly. Ben and Abigail standing there, Ben clutched a Dunkin' Donuts bag in his hand. Then Riley saw someone he wasn't expecting to see.

"Patrick!" Riley cried in surprise, seeing the elderly man who had a wide smile on his face.

"Hey there kiddo! Great to see you again!"

Patrick came forward and hugged the young man to him. The hug was tighter and longer then a typical hello hug. Riley figured Ben had probably told Patrick some of what happened.

Patrick finally released him smiling fondly.

Mikey was staring at the new comers shyly.  
"Mikey this is Ben, Abigail and Patrick, my friends," Riley introduced, motioning to each of the Gates.

"Hi Mikey," Patrick greeted with smile.

Mikey clutched the pillow to him, peeking out from behind it.

"He's still a little shy," Riley explained.  
"That's okay, my dad is pretty scary," Ben said as he rummaged around in the Dunkin' Donuts bag. Then he produced the muffin and carton of orange juice, handing to Mikey. The boy took the food items and happily started picking apart the muffin to eat it.

"Annnd here's your coffee Riley. Also I took the liberty of getting you a bagel."  
"You didn't have to I said I just wanted coffee-"  
"Right, and I'm sure that coffee plus that red lollipop equals a healthy breakfast."  
Riley chuckled softly, giving in. "Thanks Ben," he said and took the bagel.

They all sat next to Mikey's beside for a while, catching up with Patrick. As they talked and laughed Riley felt suddenly like hadn't been this at ease in a long time. It felt like forever. Riley wanted to enjoy it while it lasted, before everything else happened.

As Abigail and Patrick were playing with some toy cars they had found with Mikey, Ben leaned toward Riley, lowering his voice.

"You said you wanted to tell me something?"  
"Oh…yeah." He briefly told him about the meeting with Sadusky the night before.

"So…you're going to look after Mikey?" Ben looked doubtful and Riley felt a pang of hurt.

"It'll only be for a month or so, Ben."  
"What about your work?"  
"I can work from home…it's computer work."  
"Then…" Ben lowered his voice even more. "Riley, what about your…condition?"  
Riley gave the older man such a wounded look that Ben immediately regretted the question and his choice of words. Riley stood up, mumbling some excuse and hurried out of the room. Abigail, Patrick and Mikey stopped playing with the cars for a moment and watched him leave.

Abigail shot Ben a stern look. "Ben, what did you say to him?"  
"Nothing! I…" Ben sighed and stood up. "I'll go and talk to him."  
-

Riley was back out in the parking lot, letting the fresh air clear his head from the maddeningly sterile smell of the hospital. It wasn't fair. It wasn't fair that Ben could say that. Like he had a disease or something. Maybe he did. He didn't really know anymore.

Ben walked out into the parking lot and sighed when he saw Riley facing away from him.

"Riley?" Ben asked to the back of his friend.

"Oh," Riley muttered. "It's you." Although he wasn't expecting anyone else.

"Look, I'm sorry. I didn't mean for it to sound that way."

"No, it's fine Ben. I need to be constantly reminded anyway of my 'condition'."  
"Riley-"  
"No seriously, Ben it's fine. It's all good. I'm good."  
"Riley…"  
"It's not fair, you know? This has to stay with me after everything. What's it called, PTSD. Post traumatic stress disorder. It's stupid things, like riding in a car or not wanting to eat or being depressed all the time."  
"Those don't sound very stupid to me…" Ben said softly.  
"Well they _feel_ stupid," Riley said bitterly, sitting down heavily on the steps.

Ben sighed and sat next to him.

"I'm sorry Riley," Ben said again, this time more regretfully. "I can't pretend to understand what you're going through. I know it's hard on you…"  
"I'm just frustrated. I want to do something right for once. Take care of my now only existing blood relative, the only family I have besides you and Abigail. That kind of thing."  
"I know, and no one's saying you can't I'm just worried…"  
Riley turned and looked at him with a particularly miserable expression. He had gone through almost this same conversation before and it was discouraging him.

Ben stopped talking.

This was Riley, the guy who had gone with him on a crazy treasure hunt. The guy who believed him even when it felt like the rest of the world said he was crazy.  
"I know," Riley told him quietly. "I can barely take care of myself, so how can I take care of Mikey?"

"I know you love Mikey with all your heart, and that you'll take care of him the best you can. But I'm worried about you, Riley…I haven't stopped worrying about you. It's actually driving me a little crazy."  
Riley laughed a little and played around with the long sleeves of his shirt.

"I'm actually seriously thinking about going to see a psychologist," he confided, hoping to reassure his friend somewhat. "After this whole thing dies down…" he sighed and his eyes studied something in the distance. "Don't tell Abi, but she was right. I think I need some help. Psychology-wise."  
"That's great, Riley! Well, not _great_ that you need to see a psychologist-"

"Yeah, yeah, I get it Ben," Riley rolled his eyes.

"But that you're willing to go get help," Ben said clapping his friend on the back proudly. Riley smiled at him and stood up. "I'm heading back inside…"  
"Alright, I'll be there in a minute." Ben said. Riley nodded and walked back into the building.

Ben sat there in front of the hospital building, alone with his thoughts for a while.

-

In the next few days everything went from crazy to insane. The first thing was Mikey. His little brother had finally been let out and after signing a few (an annoyingly lot) of papers Riley was able to take his little brother home with him. David and Angela stopped by as well to meet Mikey. At first the six-year-old was shy but he warmed up to them. Riley had made sure that he explained to Mikey that these people were going to watch him. He wasn't sure how much his little brother understood but he hoped he got that these were the people he was going to live with after he stayed with Riley.

On top of all that, he was also making preparations for his father's burial. It was extremely difficult, and not because he was in mourning. That was something he felt extremely guilty about. He didn't really want to think about his final moments with his father. It pained him too much…and maybe it was his own selfishness and harbored bitterness that prevented him from forgiving him.

-

It was a graveside service and the sky was clear. Riley had arrived early with his tiny group. Mikey was holding his hand, looking around him about him with bewilderment.

The coffin lay waiting ready to be lowered into the grave, flowers arranged around it. As Riley approached it he stopped short.

"Ben," he whispered unevenly, tugging at Ben's arm. "Ben, look." The treasure hunter looked up and saw what made Riley so emotional. Two other graves, next to his father's, three names.

_Clarissa Marie Poole_

_Miriam Diane Poole_

_Kimberly Joanne Poole _

Under their names was a quote:

_"And with the morn those angel faces smile_

_Which I have loved long since and lost awhile"_

_-John Henry Newman_

Ben blinked and put a tight arm around him as Riley wiped his face with the back of his arm. Feeling a tight hug around his waist Riley looked down to see Mikey smiling up at him.

"Don't cry big brother."

Riley laughed slightly and placed a hand on top of his brown hair.

More people started arriving soon afterwards. He spotted Brad Conely who gave him a nod and the homeless shelter's curator. Agent Sadusky arrived to show his support, as did David and Angela. They came up to him, offered condolences which he accepted, although Mikey needed it more then he did.

They took their seats and Abigail had her hand placed lightly on his back.

Mikey sat next to him, quiet for the whole time as the priest intoned in the background.

Riley was barely listening, feeling slightly numb. He looked around at the people around him and wondered how many of them new his father personally. It felt like he was attending a funeral for someone he barely knew…someone who he remembered hurting him and his mother and he couldn't bring himself to think of this man as a loving father. Which was apparently what he had been to Mikey.

His little brother didn't appear to fully understand what was happening but he had tears in his eyes, knowing this was linked with his father.

Finally the priest looked up at the crowd. "Any relatives can come forward and pay their last respects."  
"That's us Mikey," Riley said to his little brother. They both walked over to the coffin. Riley touched it briefly and looked very pale for a moment. Mikey looked up and Riley questioningly, unsure why they were up in the front.

"Goodbye dad," Riley sighed. After that everyone else was allowed forward to pay their respects. Ben, Abigail and Patrick came up behind them.

Everyone stood back and watched the coffin being lowered into the ground.

-

A while afterward, as people dispersed, talking in hushed tones, Riley still stood there, numbly clutching Mikey's hand.

"Ri," Abigail said gently. "Are you coming back to the car?"  
"You can go. I'll be there in a minute." Riley said softly.  
Abigail nodded and gently leading Mikey away.

"Come on Mikey, Riley wants to be alone right now."

"Is Riley okay?" Mikey asked Abigail in concern, brown eyes shining with tears. Abigail looked quickly down at the boy and smiled gently.  
"He's fine Mikey. Now come on, let's go to the car." She walked away, Mikey's hand in hers, followed slowly by Ben and Patrick.  
Riley stood in front of his family's graves. All four of them were now buried together. Sighing he knelt down and touched his sisters grave, turning his head toward the sky. He had never really prayed before so he wasn't exactly sure how. His mom had been into that kind of thing…not him.  
"Hey, God? Take care of them up there. And keep an eye on Miriam. She's a sneaky one…probably switching halos on angels…that kind of thing. Thanks."

He stood up and wiped his eyes again, staring at the stone headstone.

Then he turned and walked away from the gravesite to join his surrogate family.

-

It was very late when Riley and Mikey finally returned to the apartment. They had been dropped off by the Gates, which had been very nice. Riley had given Mikey his room and he had taken the foldout couch. Once Mikey was tucked in and comfortable Riley went back into the living room and crashed onto the couch. He was exhausted, as he seemed to be often nowadays. It had been a long day with the funeral…his mind was too tired to really think about it anymore. He closed his eyes, drifting asleep.

It seemed that he had just closed his eyes when Riley was awakened suddenly by Mikey's cry from the next room.

He immediately scrambled out of the sheets and off the couch. Throwing open the door he saw Mikey sitting up in bed and crying.

"Riley, I'm scared! I'm really scared, I don't want them to hurt me." he whimpered.

Riley felt his heart plunge at the words and rushed to his brother's side and hugged him close.  
"Hey chief, hey it's okay. Nobody's going to hurt you. You're safe."

"You promise?" the boy whispered shakily.

"I promise you Mikey. Nothing's going to happen. I'm here."

Mikey sniffed and nestled his head on Riley's chest.

Riley remembered how Ben had sat up with him that one night to tell him stories. Maybe it would help distract Mikey's thoughts.

"Hey Buddy, did I ever tell you about how me and Ben and Abigail found the treasure?"  
Mikey shook his head and snuggled closer to Riley. Riley ruffled his hair and put his chin on his head.

"Well, it all started when Ben walked into where I was working, which was a really boring office…."

Riley stopped talking. He had just gotten to the part where Ben had decided to steal the Declaration of Independence. Mikey's eyelids had nearly closed and he was blinking to stay awake.

"What happened Riley?" he murmured tiredly.  
"Well, then Mikey had to go bed because he was really tired." Riley stated with a smile.

"But I want to knowww…." Mikey yawned.

"I'll tell you more tomorrow night okay?"

"Mmmmkay…" murmured Mikey, too tired to argue anymore. He was out like a light moments later. Riley sighed and continued to cradle him in his arms.

His blue eyes gazed blankly at the ceiling, one hand stroking Mikey's back. The moon shone through the window illuminating the room, and the crickets droned in the background.

Eventually he found his eyes closing as well, and he drifted back into sleep.

-

A/N: Well, I don't know how I feel about this chapter but I hoped you somewhat liked it.

It's nearing the end (yay) I want to finish it so I'm sorry if it seemed rushed. Also I gave Hendricks the first name of David because we have a family friend who's in the FBI named David!

Please review!


	10. The Brothers

A/N: Almost done Ugh talk about writers block -- Practically had to force myself to write. Not thrilled with how this came out. But I hope you like! And it contains fluffiness in the beginning. You gotta luff da fluff!  
-

Over the next few weeks Mikey's shyness dissolved. Riley was ecstatic to see that in its place emerged a curious and vibrant six-year-old. It was how it should have been, and it still broke Riley's heart that his little bother had to go through such an ordeal. He never wanted anything to happen to Mikey again, he didn't want the boy to end up like _him_.

There were still times when Mikey would get nightmares and wake up screaming. Other times it was harder because he would cry for their father and Riley had to explain again that he wasn't coming back.

The two agents Riley had begun to consider as friends. David and Angela came over at least once a week and took Mikey to go somewhere special. The boy had had warmed up considerably to them and even looked forward to their visits.

Sometimes the Pooles would go somewhere with the Gates family. It seemed that his friend's lives had turned somewhat back to normal for them. Riley didn't want to detract from their time anymore then he already had. Though he knew they would be more then willing to help him with anything.

-

Time went a little more swiftly then Riley would have liked. Before he knew it Mikey only had a week left in his stay and Riley wouldn't have traded those days for the world.

They would often walk to a little park that was a few blocks away from his apartment. Mikey proved to have some excellent monkey-bar skills. Expect he would get stuck in the middle and Riley would try to pull him off. Mikey would whine and cling onto the bars tighter, attracting a few stares. The end result was usually Mikey crash landing on top of him.

After Riley made sure he didn't have any broken bones, they would get ice cream, both chocolate, and walk into the back wooded area of the park.

There was a stream there the Mikey never failed to get wet in. As he hopped around, it caused his ice cream to plop into the water, which prompted him to turn to Riley and look pathetically at him until he gave him his own ice cream.

Abigail had gone with them on one of these escapades and kept shaking her head saying, "It's like a miniature you… a tiny little Riley. Heaven help us."

-

On Saturday afternoon, there was only one more day before Mikey would move in with David and Angela. Riley decided to do one last special thing with his little brother during his stay.

-

Riley poked his head into the kitchen to see Mikey standing on a chair and going through the cupboard.

"Mikey, get down from there."  
Mikey turned to him with a pout.

"I wanted some chips."  
"I'll get them for you. Just ask next time," Riley said walking over to the cabinet. "I don't want you going around and standing on chairs. You could get hurt."  
"But I'm too short!" Mikey complained, hopping off the chair.

"When you get older you won't be short anymore."  
"Abigail says you're short too."  
"Well, she can be very mean sometimes," Riley muttered, searching for the bag of chips.

"But it's _funny_," Mikey giggled.

"Ha-ha. Okay here you go. Don't eat too much."  
Mikey took the bag of tortilla clips and happily began munching on them. Riley let a fond sigh, ruffling his hair. _I spoil this kid way too much. _

He checked his watch. If they left now they'd still have time…

"Hey, Mikey, have you ever been to a zoo before?"  
Mikey looked up at his big brother, chip frozen between the air and his mouth. He shook his head.

"Would you like to go now?"  
"Yeah!" Mikey said excitedly.

"Awesome, let me get my stuff. We can catch the bus there."  
"But you have that shiny red car! Why can't we take your car?"  
"Um, well, I'm not very good at driving right now."  
Mikey nodded contemplatively. "Oh, okay. That's okay Riley."  
Riley sighed and quickly packed a bag, throwing in some food for lunch. He felt particularly guilty at the wastefulness of not driving that car.

"Okay Mikey, ready to go?"  
Mikey nodded eagerly. "

-

The two brothers exited the bus. As Riley walked toward the entrance of the zoo, Mikey was bounding at his heels like an exited puppy.

"Will there be monkeys, Riley? Huh? Will there?"  
"Mikey, _you're _being a monkey!" He placed a hand on Mikey's head to stop him from hopping up and down. The result was it looked like he was dribbling a human basketball.

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure they have monkeys here." Riley said as they got in line for the tickets.

Mikey must have been very eager to get inside, Riley figured. He had never been to a zoo, and he probably had never had seen many of the animals in person.

As they waited a woman kept glancing at Riley and then tentatively asked him, "Did I see you on the news? Didn't you help find the Templar Treasure?"  
"Yup!" Mikey answered for him. "He helped Ben find it and there was lots of it and he helped steal the Declaration of Independence!"  
"What?" the woman looked flabbergasted. Riley grinned sheepishly at her.  
"All in a days work, ma'me. Excuse me, I need to buy the tickets."  
Riley purchased the tickets and he and Mikey walked into the zoo. Riley looked at a directory trying to figure out where they were in proximity to everything else.

"Stay close, I don't want you to get los…" he glanced around but Mikey had vanished from where he was standing."…t."  
Riley groaned and did a three-sixty. He spotted Mikey leaning over the alligator exhibit.

"AHH! Mikey, Mikey-" Riley ran forward and plucked his brother off the railing. "Don't do that it's dangerous! And you need to stick close, otherwise you'll get lost."  
"I don't want to get lost," Mikey said, his eyes going wide.

"Then don't run off like that again, okay?" Riley said sternly. Mikey nodded looking a little put out.

Riley sighed and turned back at the directory. "Who do you want to see first?"  
"Monkeys!" Mikey said immediately.

"Okay, let's go look at the monkeys!"  
A few minutes later they were standing in front of the monkey cage and Mikey was nearly beside himself.

"Riley, Riley look at that one! He's swinging with his tail. I wish I had a tail."  
"That would be pretty cool," Riley agreed as they watched the spider monkeys swing around in the exhibit. They continued walking and were able to look at the Golden Lion Tamarins and chimpanzees.

There was a crowd of people and Mikey was jumping up and down impatiently.

"I'm still short," he whined. Riley smiled and with some effort picked Mikey up so he could see the chimpanzees.

"There you go. Hey, look at that Mikey. There's a little baby one," Riley pointed out. The mom was carrying it around.

"They look funny," Mikey laughed hugging his bother around the neck.

"Monkeys are supposed to look funny." He set Mikey on the ground again and they continued onward to the next exhibit. Mikey tugged at his arm.

"Riley, can I ask a question?" he asked suddenly. Riley smiled down at him.

"Sure, what is it?"  
"We're from the same daddy right? But not the same mommy. Does that mean we're not brothers?"

Riley was a little startled by the question. He looked at Mikey and the kid seemed genuinely upset at the prospect.  
"Well, how we're related, people call that half-brothers. But family doesn't always mean the people you're related to. It can be people who aren't related to you."  
Mikey looked thoughtful and nodded his head. "Oh, okay. Like you and Ben."  
Riley smiled and ruffled his hair. "Like me and Ben."  
"So we can be full-brothers if we wanted?" Mikey asked excitedly.  
"Sure, if you want!" Riley laughed.

Mikey looked much happier and turned his attention back to the animal exhibits.

"Hey, let's go look at the gorillas," Riley said, looking at the map. "Ben got to meet a gorilla once."  
"Really? Was he nice?"  
"Maybe should ask him next time you see him. I'm sure he'll be happy to tell you," Riley chuckled.

After the gorillas they made their way through the rest of the zoo and stopped to look at the penguins, sea lions, lions, pandas polar bears and ocelots. Mikey especially liked the capybaras, the largest rodent in the world.

"They look like furry hippos," Mikey said observantly.

"Did you know that there's a Native American story that says the hippo was beautiful, but then lost all it's fur? Maybe it looked like a capybara."

"Coooool," Mikey murmured.

-  
It was a great day for both of them. Riley hadn't remembered the last time he had that much fun. He got a kick out of watching his little bother's wonderment as he looked at the various animals and excitedly talked and pointed things out to Riley.

When they finally had to leave Riley was expecting Mikey to pout and ask to stay longer. Instead his little brother latched himself into a hug around Riley's waist because he couldn't reach any higher.

"That was fun Riley!" he said happily. Riley laughed and gave him a small squeeze around the shoulders.

"I'm glad you liked it. Come on, we should head back…"

He looked down at Mikey again and frowned a little.

"Hey…you remember I told you that tomorrow you're going home with David and Angela, right?"  
Mikey played with his fingers, not meeting Riley's gaze.

"Yeah."

That was all he said and Riley didn't know weather or not he should have been worried.  
-

The next day Riley called David, finalizing the plans. He felt saddened that Mikey wasn't going to be staying with him any longer but he knew it was for the kid's best interests. The two agents were loving people and they were really excited about fostering his little brother. Riley knew he would never be able to take care of him as a full on responsibility.

And it wasn't like he could never see Mikey again. That was something he had to keep reminding himself over again. There would be plenty of visits.

The doorbell rang and Riley opened it for David. He came bustling in looking almost as excited as Mikey was when he went to the zoo.

"Hi, Riley," he said breathlessly as he pumped Riley's arm. "Today's the day huh? Is Mikey getting ready?"  
"Yeah, I told him to get his things together…he doesn't have too much though. We went shopping for some clothes and I got him a few toys but that's it. Where's Angela?"  
"Oh, she's getting something she baked for you in the car." Then he whispered conspiratorially under his breath, "Cookies, she made you cookies. Augh, I wasn't supposed to tell you. Don't tell her I told you, it's a surprise."

Angela appeared in the doorway holding a fresh batch of cookies, grinning broadly.

"Riley! Made these for you this morning!"  
"Act surprised," Hendricks muttered out of the corner of his mouth.

"Oh my _gosh _thank you soooo much Angela! You didn't need to do that" Riley gushed obviously over the top.

Angela stopped and looked in annoyance at her husband.

"You told him!"

David grinned sheepishly at her. "I was just too proud of you sweetie. Everything you bake always…"  
"Where's Mikey?" Angela interrupted shoving the tray of cookies at David.

"Um, he's in the bedroom. I'll go get him."  
Riley creaked open the door and Mikey looked up at him, smiling with those brown eyes. He was really going to miss having his brother around.

"Hey chief, you ready to go? Angela and David are here."

Mikey picked up his stuff and came to the door. David took his small book bag to bring to the car.

Riley knelt down and gave him a tight hug. "Bye, Mikey. I'll see you soon."  
Mikey's eyes suddenly went wide and he pulled away from Riley.

"You're staying, Riley? You're not coming?"  
"Mikey," Riley said with a small laugh. "I thought I told you…I can't live there too…this is my house."  
"I want you to come!" Mikey said his voice suddenly sounding scared. "I don't want you to go away!"  
"Mikey, I'm not, you're just going to be living somewhere else…" Riley said, his heart sinking. He thought he had explained this to Mikey, that his brother had understood that he would live somewhere different.  
"No!" Mikey cried tears beginning to form in his eyes. "I don't want to leave because then I'll never see you again!"  
Riley realized Mikey was terrified of abandonment. After everything that had happened to him, he probably thought once he left Riley would disappear forever. Just like his father had. Angela had a hand over her mouth and David looked dismayed, still clutching the book bag.

Riley tried to console his brother. "I'm not going anywhere, I'll still visit you…David and Angela are super-nice, you know that…"  
Mikey didn't even seem to hear him, his six-year-old mind already set in it's fear.

"You're going to leave me!" he said and began to cry.

"Mikey-"

The boy broke away from Riley and ran back into the room, slamming the door to his room.

Riley was still kneeling, staring hopelessly at the closed door. Then he turned apologetically to the two agents.

"I-I'm sorry…I explained it…I thought he was okay…"

Angela shook her head and put a hand on his shoulder.

"It's not your fault, Riley. He's just a little boy…maybe he didn't realize the full situation until now."

Riley sighed and shook his head, standing up. "What should I do?" he sadly asked them.

"Let him have some room for a little bit. Then you can you talk to him." David suggested with a kind smile.

"Okay," Riley sighed, taking a deep breath.

-

It was a while later and Riley hoped Mikey had calmed down enough for him to talk. He went to the door and knocked softly.

"Mikey?" he asked. There was no answer on the other side. "Come on Mikey, I know you're in there."  
Still no answer. Sighing, he turned the doorknob and entered the room.

"Mike-" Riley stopped short. Mikey wasn't anywhere to be seen. Quickly, he checked around, in the closets or under the bed he could have been hiding. His anxiousness quickly mounting he looked at the window seeing it open and felt his stomach drop. The fire escape.

"Oh no," he muttered. He ran out of the room and stared at the couple in panic.

"Mikey's gone out the fire escape," he said fearfully.  
"What?" Angela gasped.

"He could be anywhere, around the block or….who knows are far-" Riley began, his face pale.

David cut him off, now looking more like an FBI agent on the job then a worried would-be foster parent. "First, we have to not panic. This is what we're going to do. Me and Angela will take the car and go around the neighborhood. Riley' do you have any idea where he could be?"

Riley suddenly realized where he should check. The park, the park he and Mikey always went to. He loved it there and it was Riley's guess it would have been the first place he'd go.

"The park, we went there all the time. I'm going to check there." Riley said.

"Okay, let's get going."  
Riley nodded, and they all sprang into action. Opening a draw he grabbed a flash light out of it. He fumbled for his coat and keys, already in a full-out run as he took out his cell phone to call Ben.

"Hey, Riley."  
"Ben something happened, with Mikey. He's gone, he ran away!"

"Oh no…do you know where he could-"

"I think I know where. David and Angela are checking around the neighborhood. I'm going to the park near my house. Can you head over there?"  
"Of course. We'll be right there.!" Ben said and then clicked off the phone.

Riley hurriedly pressed the button for the elevator and stepped inside. It descended infuriatingly slow. His heart was hammering. He knew Mikey was a resourceful kid, he had been through dangerous situations before. But that didn't make this any less dangerous. It was late at night and he was just a little kid running around. It was far from safe.

He ran outside and stopped dead in front of his car. He cursed at his own hesitation and jumped into the car without opening the door and started the engine.

Angrily, he slammed his fist on the steering wheel as the nauseous anxiety started to already build.

"_Stop it! _I'm not dealing with this," he growled to himself.

His concern for his brother overrode his fear. After taking a few deep breaths, he pulled out of the parking spot and onto the road.

-  
As he pulled up to the park everything was eerily dark. It looked very different at night then it did in the daytime. The moon reflected off the equipment in the playground and Riley couldn't help but feel more worried. Where was Mikey? Riley knew Mikey didn't know the full danger of what he had done. And after everything that had happened Riley was nearly terrified with concern. That little boy meant more to Riley then anything else, and he'd be damned if he let something happen to him.

Ben hadn't shone up yet and Riley didn't have the time to wait. He looked at his cell phone and grimaced. Little to no service over here. So much for switching to that new plan.

Well, he'd have to go looking with or without Ben.

Taking the flashlight he made his way through the park, calling his Mikey name, hoping desperately to hear an answer.  
Eventually he found himself at the edge of the short patch of wooded area. Taking a breath he walked in, the flashlight bouncing off the trees.

"Mikey?" he called. His own voice sounded strange in the stillness.

There was no answer. Riley felt his heart hammering.

He couldn't loose him. He couldn't loose anyone else.

"MIKEY! Come on, please answer me!" he shouted into the surrounding trees.  
"Riley!"

Riley could have cried in relief. He dashed toward where he heard the sound. Then he stopped, foot balanced precariously at the edge of a ditch. It wasn't that deep but was steep enough for someone to fall and hurt themselves if they were not paying attention. Scared, Riley flashed the light around the bottom until it landed on a small figure.

Mikey was lying at the bottom of the ravine, his leg twisted beneath him at an odd angle.

"Mikey!"  
"Riley!" the boy screamed in a mixture of relief and terror. "My leg hurts! I can't move it!"  
"Okay, okay, calm down buddy. I'm coming down there."

Mikey tried to sit up but cried out in pain.

"Mikey, don't move. Don't move. It looks like you broke your leg."  
Riley tested the steepness. He would have to go slowly. Carefully, he descended with one hand on the earth, the other shining the flashlight in front of him to make sure there was nothing obstructing his path.

Finally he made it down to the bottom and Riley was able to see Mikey's pale and terrified face. Riley ran over to him and gathered him up in his arms.

"Riley!" the boy sobbed and hugged him around the middle. "I-I'm sorry I ran away! Don't hate me! Don't be mad!"  
Riley held his brother protectively to him as he cried into his shirt.

"I'm just glad you're safe. I'll never hate you Mikey. Never, ever." Riley murmured comfortingly.

"It was s-so dark…and I thought…I w-was…going to die!" Mikey whimpered in between sobs. Riley held the terrified boy close in his arms. He kissed him on the top of the head.

"It's okay Mikey. You're safe now. I've got you." Riley calmed and rocked his little brother in his arms.  
It was a little while before Riley heard the faint calls in the distance.

Ben and Abigail were probably looking for them. He let go of Mikey and stood up to get them. Mikey grabbed him by the shirt.

"D-don't go! Please don't leave me!" he sniffled.

Riley knelt back down and wiped his tears away. "I need to go and get help. I'll never leave you Mikey. Just hang on for a minute okay? I need to tell them where we are. Do you think you can do that? Can you be brave for me?"  
"Y-yeah," Mikey nodded resolutely but he still looked terrified.

"I'll be back in a minute okay?" He scrambled back up the edge of the ravine and shouted to Ben and Abigail.  
"We're over here! I found him! Call an ambulance, his leg is broken!"  
-

**A few days later…**

Mikey was being seen off again. This time he was quiet as Riley said goodbye to him. He had a little cast over his leg. After Ben and Abigail had found them, they took Mikey to a hospital. It turned out the leg wasn't badly fractured and the doctor said it would heal quickly.

Ben and Abigail had come over as well to say their goodbyes. Mikey looked completely miserable and Riley had to keep saying it wasn't forever, he would see him again.

"We'll visit and everything," Riley said with a gentle smile

Mikey's eyes welled up with tears. "But I don't want to leave you Riley! You're my big brother!"  
"Hey, remember what I said about family not having to be people your related to? Well, they really want to keep you. They want to be your mommy and daddy."

Mikey's eyes widened. "I'll have a mommy and daddy?"  
Riley nodded, feeling his throat constrict. "Yeah, they'll take care of you and love you. It'll be a blast, I promise."  
"But, I want a big brother…too," Mikey whispered miserably. Riley hugged the little boy to him. "I'll visit you every chance I get. We'll be able to do stuff together."  
"Why can't I live with you?" Mikey asked, his deer-brown eyes looking like pools of liquid. Riley had been thinking of an answer in case the boy asked him this question.  
"I love you Mikey, but there some things going on with me that will take me away from you. I won't be able to be there all the time."  
"Does it have to do with how you sometimes have bad dreams?" Mikey asked quietly.

Riley jerked back a little bit. The kid was too perceptive for his own good. "You weren't supposed to know I have bad dreams."  
Mikey shrugged. "I have bad dreams too, Riley. But I have you when I wake up."

Riley blinked back tears that were coming to his eyes.

"And now you'll have David and Angela. "  
"Are you sick, Riley?" Mikey asked.

"Yes," Riley swallowed. "I'm sick. And I'm having trouble taking care of myself right now and I don't want that to hurt you. Okay, Mikey?"  
Mikey nodded and suddenly threw his arms around Riley's neck and hugged him tightly.

"I love you big brother."  
"I love you too Mikey. Be good for your mom and dad okay?"  
Mikey nodded bravely. "Okay."

David smiled at Riley and took Mikey's hand. Angela waved at him.  
"Come on, Mikey. Time to head out." David helped buckle the boy into his seat and then went around and started the car.

Riley felt Abigail and Ben come up beside him. Mikey waved at them through the car window and they waved back.

"Bye!"  
"Bye, Mikey! I'll see you soon okay?"  
The car backed up and drove down the road. Riley waited until it was out of sight before sighing and sitting down on the steps. There were a couple of minutes of silence.

"Do you want to go inside?" Abigail spoke up, breaking the silence gently. "I made some of that casserole…"  
Riley stared blankly at her for a moment then he pulled on a disgusted face.

"Ew, Abigail, that green stuff?"

"That concoction is my secret recipe and I wouldn't insult it if I were you."

Ben chortled as they all stood and made their back into the apartment building.

-

A/N: Meh. Hope you guys liked it anyway! On more chapter!

Seriously, if you don't know what a capybara looks like go google image it. They're so cute At least _I _think so.


	11. Epilogue aka The End

A/N: Woot, two chapters in one day :D

-

Riley walked into the waiting room and looked around. It was a nice enough room, he thought. Couches, magazines…nice paintings of…boats. Okay then. He walked over to a women sitting behind a desk.

"Um, hi…" she looked up at him and smiled.

"Yes hon, anything I can do for you?" She spoke with a slight southern drawl. Why did receptionists insist on calling him 'hon'?

"Yeah, I'm here for a three thirty appointment with Amy Fletcher?"  
She glanced at piece of paper on the wall.

"Riley Poole?"  
"Yup."  
"This is your first time here?"  
"Yes it is."

"Okay, it's required for everyone who's here for the first time to fill out this sheet. It's a list of questions."  
She handed him a clipboard with a paper attached to it and a pen.

"When you're done just hand it back to me, kay?"

"Okay, thanks."  
He went to go sit down on one of the couches. It was kind of lumpy but whatever. He looked at the questions and realized there were a good few pages of them.  
_Wonderful_, he thought dully. _There go my hopes and dreams of getting out of here as soon as possible. _

-

Amy stood up as the door to her office opened. A young man walked in and she immediately took in his physical appearance. He was a small man, brown hair, blue eyes. Very pale, dark bags under his eyes, malnourished look. Maybe mid to late twenties, around the same age as her oldest son. She was trained to look past physical appearances. He had a sort of determined air to him, a briskness.

She offered her hand and he took it, shaking it with a surprising firmness.

"Hi, you must be Riley."  
"That's me. You're Dr. Fletcher I take it?"

"Call me Amy. Have a seat."

Riley didn't know what he was expected but Amy's office was completely different from the image he had formed in his imagination. He was expecting more…white walls and fewer… dogs. Pictures of black Labrador retrievers dotted nearly every picture frame.

He sat on the couch and Amy must have seen him looking at the many pictures.

"Yes, that's my dog Abigail."  
Riley started and felt himself grin. "Abigail, huh?" He couldn't wait to rub that in a certain person's face.

Amy tilted her head to the side at his sudden amused look. "Something I said?"  
Riley waved his hand and dismissed it.

"So what about you Riley? Do you have any pets?"

He wasn't sure how applicable the question was and really didn't want the small talk but he shrugged.

"No, unless you count my computer. I don't like cats; I'm allergic to dogs. I had a hamster once but that didn't end very well."  
Amy chuckled quietly and leaned forward in her chair in a conversational manner.

"I take it you like computers?"  
"Yeah. Oh yeah. It's my livelihood. I don't want to brag or anything but I can basically do anything with a computer."  
He seemed distinctly happy when telling this part of himself to her. Riley did in fact enjoy telling some fresh faces his skill. Ben, Abigail and Patrick knew of it very well so he couldn't exactly brag about it to them. It was probably the equivalent of _them _talking to _him _about some historical thing that he couldn't care less about.

"So Riley…" she looked over the answers to questions he filled out. Depression, panic and anxiousness, and loss of sleep. Typical symptoms she usually dealt with but always a different cause. "Do you want to talk about what brought you here?"  
Riley blew out a puff of air. "Geeze, doc this is going to be a long story."  
"Well, we have an hour. Just tell me what you can for right now."

About a half hour later of straight talking Riley had given her a shortened version of what had happened.

Amy was nodding and writing on her clipboard. Riley sat there uncomfortably, shifting his weight slightly.

Finally she looked up. "That's quite something," she murmured. She noted how he had told her the events on a very surface level, not talking about how he felt, his feelings. He told it to her as if he were reading it from a newspaper. That was okay, they had plenty of time to work through this.

"Well, I'm glad you're here Riley."  
"Can you…I mean," Riley didn't look at her. "Since I started remembering things…from my past…I've gotten these weird things happening to me. Like, I don't like driving now because of the car accident I was in. And I've lost my appetite. And, I don't have them as much anymore, but I sometimes get nightmares."  
Amy sighed and took off her glasses, looking at the pale young man.

"You have to remember…the symptoms don't just go away by themselves. We try and treat the actual PTSD, not flashbacks. The symptoms are a by-product of it, and we need to get to the root."  
Riley looked visibly disappointed but he nodded.  
"But, Amy continued," there are methods, to help you deal with the symptoms. And we'll be practicing those. Okay? Or if it turns out you want medication I can refer you to a physciatrist."  
"No, that's okay," Riley said.

"Is it okay if I ask a few questions?" Amy continued, turning back to the clipboard. "It's just for the record so I can see where we stand with everything. This is strictly confidential, and you don't need to answer if you don't feel comfortable."  
"Ask away, doc," Riley said giving her a small smile. Amy chuckled and turned to the clipboard.

"Have you ever had a problem with drug abuse."  
"No, I haven't"  
"Have you ever had a problem with alcohol abuse?"  
Riley shuddered, thinking about the problem his father had. "No."  
After a few very awkward questions later, Riley still was on a roll by answering no to all of them.

Then, "Did you ever resort to self-injury?"  
Riley paused and Amy looked up briefly from the clipboard.

He sighed. "When I was in high school but I stopped. I had a slip-up recently but it wasn't that bad."  
"Can I see?"  
Riley said yes and held up his palm for her to inspect. She studied it for a moment then nodded.

"Do you want to talk about it?"  
"I kind of lost it. I really don't know, I pulled up a picture of the car accident I was in and I needed something to ground me. Ben walked in and saw what I was doing and grabbed my hand…and I basically scratched his hand instead of mine."

Amy saw Riley's eyes flick to the floor guiltily. "It might have been worse if he didn't stop me when he did."  
Amy was looking at him thoughtfully. "It sounds like Ben and Abigail are a big part of your life."  
Riley's eyes went bright with tears and he leaned forward in the chair.

"Honestly, if it wasn't for them, I don't even know if I'd be alive right now."  
"Did they take you in?"  
Riley smiled softly, "In a way…yeah they did. Sometimes I feel so selfish, just always foisting myself on them."  
"Well, Riley, you kind of took Mikey in didn't you?"  
"That's different. He's just a kid."

"He's a person in need, just like you were. And you took care of Mikey just like your friends took care of you."

"But he's family…my little brother…"  
"And from what it sounds like, Abigail and Ben are your family as well. Riley, I'm sure they told you and I'll tell you too, that you're not a burden to them."  
Riley slowly nodded his elbows propped up on his leg. "I'm beginning to figure that out a little more. Ben always tells me that."

"Well, he's right."  
"He's _always _right," Riley muttered.

-  
Fifteen minutes later the session was done and Riley excited the building. Abigail was waiting for him outside, reading a magazine. She had insisted on coming to the first appointment with Riley. Ben would have come but he had to work during that time and Abigail was able to take off for the afternoon.

She looked up at him and smiled.  
"Ready to go?"

"Yeah, let's head out." He climbed into the passenger side next to his friend. "Hey can we stop at Starbucks or something? I'm craving some nice mocha frappuccino."  
"Sure." Abigail kept glancing at him. Riley sighed and answered her blatant unasked question.

"It went fine. You know she had a dog named Abigail?"

"Don't get any ideas Riley," Abigail glared at him. Riley smirked and turned to look out the window.

-

**A few weeks later…**

Riley poked his head into the hallway with a grin on his face.  
"Where are my favorite historians?" he called.

"Riley!" Abigail shouted in an annoyed voice. "How'd you get in?"  
"Oh I have my ways," he answered smugly. He looked around hurriedly. "Is Ben here? I want to talk to both of you."  
"Yeah he's in the kitchen…is everything okay?" Abigail asked studying her friend. Sometimes Riley would call them without telling them why. He would talk on the phone for a little while with one of them about nothing in particular. Abigail figured he just needed distraction from some demon or another that he was having difficulty with. Both she and her husband gladly took the time to talk if it meant helping him. And it seemed he was improving. The therapy sessions were helping him and he ate more regularly now. He looked healthier; the color seemed to have returned to him. Most importantly, he was happier. The glazed look that had haunted his eyes had all but disappeared and he was able to be himself more and more often.

"Yeah, everything's fine, I just want to say something to you guys."

Ben walked out of the kitchen and smiled when he saw his friend. "Hey, how are you doing?"

"Pretty good…um…" he paused and seemed to be grappling for words. "I just wanted…to say thank you."  
Ben and Abigail looked in puzzlement at Riley who took a deep breath.

"I know…that there is nothing I can say to truly express my thanks. You guys helped me through some of the darkest weeks in my life. Even when I was being impossible you never gave up on me. I don't know what I would have done without you …" Riley was choking up a little bit. He wanted to say all the gratitude he felt for them being there. But nothing he said seemed to truly wrap around what he was feeling. Ben and Abigail were getting teary eyed as well.

"Man…I'm no good at this type of thing. I guess what I want to say to you both, is thank you. Just…thank you."

Riley cleared his throat and spoke before they felt they needed to reply to that. "I made something for you two. It's not much it feels inadequate after everything. But I hope you like it."

He reached into the bag he was holding and pulled out a beautifully leather bound and thick book.

"So, you know how you guys are into history and everything?"  
"What tipped you off?" Ben smiled.

"Well, I did some research and got as much information as I could about both your families ancestors. "  
He opened the book and Abigail and Ben leaned forward to look.

There were old black and white photographs, pieces of yellowing paper, typed information…diary pages. Over each page the relative's name was scripted out and beneath the birth and death date.

"This side is the Gates and this side is the Chases. When you get closer to the middle, the more closer to present day you get, Until…" Riley flipped exactly into the middle. Ben's picture was on one side and Abigail's was on the other.  
"Ta-dah! The rest is history. Unless you guys decide to have a little baby Gates running around." Riley turned to them a little uncertainly. "You probably know all this stuff already about your families…"

Ben was flipping through the book in awe. "Riley…this is fantastic! Where did you get these photographs…and these handwritten documents! I looked everywhere but couldn't find…" He stopped at a page entitled _Thomas Gates_. The black and white picture showed a young man, baring resemblance to him and his father. It just made it seem so much more real, more tangible.

"Well, you know me…connections and all that." Riley smirked. Abigail suddenly pulled him into another hug and planted kiss on his cheek.

"Eeew! Abigail…" Riley tried to squirm away and wiped his cheek with his sleeve.

"Never knew you were the scrap booking type" she giggled.

"It's _not_ a scrap book" he began defensively, "It's…"  
"I was just kidding. I love it. I love it to death. We both love it. Riley this is marvelous."

Ben laughed and ruffled Riley's hair. "Wow, this is officially a family heirloom. Thank you. This is amazing! My dad will be absolutely ecstatic to see this."

Riley was beaming from ear to ear. "You guys like it!"  
"Yeah! 'Course we do! I mean, I have to say, I'm a little jealous you got all this information before I did!" Ben laughed. Riley just continued smiling. They liked it. That was all that mattered.

He looked at his watch. "I should head out. I'm going over to visit Mikey now."  
"You're driving again?" Ben asked with a grin.  
"Oh yes. Oh yes…" Riley said evilly.

"Uh oh, steer clear of the roads and sidewalks." Abigail smirked.

"Har har. Okay, well I'll see you later. Enjoy your _scrapbook._"

-

A few days later Riley was paying another of his frequent visits to his little brother and Ben and Abigail were with him to visit their surrogate nephew.

"Riley, are you sure you don't want to come?"  
"To be quite frank Abigail, I don't think I can attend another one of those things. I mean, there's the food…no girls to talk to. Just stuffy old men."

"There are actually a lot of women. Ben had quite a following of groupies."  
"You have groupies?" Riley asked slightly envious.

"It's not as great as it sounds Riley. Believe me," Ben said glumly.

"Well none of them are interested in me then."  
"Mmm, I don't know," Abigail said mischievously. "You're usually to busy wallowing in your own self pity to notice how many of them are checking you out."  
"Really? They actually look interested?" Riley said hopefully.

"Well if you would pay attention once in a while and stop stuffing your face you would see that."  
"Huh, well then," Riley turned his attention back to the road, looking pleased. "That's good to know. But…" his voice got a little quieter. "I think I'm done with parties."  
The Gates looked at him and nodded.

"We understand Riley," Ben said.

"Thank you." That was all Riley felt like he was saying lately. It was a long process, he knew. His friends knew. His therapist was helping him sort through all the crap that was inside of him. How he was scared to enter into relationships because he feared abandonment or seeing the person hurt.  
Seeing his father had helped close some doors that had been left opened and it helped him find his little brother. Mikey. Riley smiled at the thought of him.

"We're here!" Ben said, poking his head out the car window.

They pulled up in front of the house and David came out to meet them.  
"Is Mikey here?" Riley asked excitedly.

"Sure is! He'll be so happy that you're here today! In school he…" he shook is head and smiled. "Well I'll let him tell you himself. Mikey! Riley, Ben and Abigail are here!" he called. The front door slammed open and the kid let out a cry of delight.

"Hey Chief!" Riley yelled. "How're ya doing!"

In response Mikey ran over to his brother and threw his arms around him as if it had been weeks instead of days since he'd seen him.

Abigail and Ben stood grinning. It was a soft, perfect moment that comes only comes once and far between. Abigail took Ben's hand and he drew her toward himself.

"He'll be okay," she said quietly with a smile on her lips. Ben watched his best friend play with his little brother. Ben smiled as Riley swooped Mikey up in his arms, Riley was laughing in a wonderfully open way and Mikey laughing right along with him.

"I have a sneaking suspicion," Ben said, kissing his wife on the head, "That you are absolutely right."

**THE END**

-

A/N: Well, that's the end. After months. And months. And months. Hope you guys enjoyed this.

Since I feel like torturing myself I'm going to list the things I should have done differently.

Riley in my opinion was too out of character. My sister, ever the critic, was like, "Even if he was depressed he would still have some of his humor." I agree and I'll work on keeping him in character in my next story. But it WAS kind of the point that he wasn't being himself. shrugs

Starting all the chapters with "The". It was like an impulse decision at the beginning but I mean seriously. What did I think this was, Animorphs?

Not really something I wanted to do differently but there were some little scenes I wrote but I didn't put in because they just added unnecessary angst.

Oh, also I apologize for the grammatical/spelling errors -- (Shrivels up and dies in a corner) Thank you for trying to decipher through my blunders.

BUT IT'S DONE!! Yay. I'm defiantly posting another National Treasure story, hopefully soon. Thank you again to all the kind reviewers, you guys are awesome!

**ALSO I think I'm going to be changing my pen name. **Just a forewarning, I've had this one for four years and it's really staring to annoy me.

HUGS EVERYONE WHO READ THE STORY!! THANK YOU!!3

-

Spoiler alert for the DVD (don't read if you don't want to know what happens in the deleted scenes. I'm just excited about them.):  
Who saw the deleted scenes?? I loved that "Pursuit at Mount Rushmore". It was great that Sadusky got to have more screen time there so you get to see a little but more into his character. And I was really happy that Ben did his infamous "If you touch any of them, I'll kill you." I was like, "Yesh, Ben! Yesh! You tell ol' Wilkinson!"

And that little scene with Riley messing with that lady's computer XD!? That was so cute! "Do you know computers?" "Uh…not really…well, yeah, maybe a little."

Annnd…the one where Ben is balancing on the glass and Sadusky comes and corners him. And Ben calls him "Pete". XD. That was funny, their dialogue in that scene.

Too bad I don't have Blu-ray I wanted to know what happens in the two other deleted scenes!

Wow, that went longer then I thought. I'm done with rambling now!


End file.
